Simi Valley, CA – Former President Ronald Reagan turned over in his grave last night and rose from the dead to deliver a message to the country.

“What the hell is going on down there?!,” Reagan shouted in a booming voice from his grave at his Presidential library, “What did you people just do?”

Reagan was reacting to the election of Barrack Hussein Obama as the next President of the United States.

“I said win one for the gipper, not win one for the United Socialist States of America,” fumed Reagan.

The former President was visibly upset after the results of last night's election and what it means for the future of the Republic.

“I busted my hump for my entire political career to end the scourge of Communism and Socialism in the world and you people go and elect one as the President of the United States?” said Reagan who added with his usual wit and charm, “You kids better not make me come down there. I swear I will turn this car around and we will go right home.”

Reagan then spoke about his 1983 defense build up that broke the back of the former Soviet Union and freed millions of people form the rule of Communism.

“This country spent Trillions of dollars and thousands of lives to end this scourge once and for all. I thought it was all but dead save for Cuba and North Korea and they were on the way out the door when I shed my mortal coil and now you elect one as the leader of the country? That is an insult to every American service man and woman who made the ultimate sacrifice to God and country to end this evil for of government,” said Reagan.

“When I told Gorby to tear down that wall, I didn't mean tear it down, move it to Washington and rebuild the damm thing,” said Reagan who added with tears in his eyes, “my legacy is destroyed. I now feel like my Presidency was a failure. I ended communism abroad, only to have it resurface in America.”

“Who would have thunk it. The President of Russia, who is a son-of-a-bitch, is a bigger conservative than the President of America,” sighed Reagan who added with his usual positive outlook, “if the country survived Carter for one term, we can survive Obama.

Several servicemen also accompanied the former President and also spoke late last night at the library.

“It may have not been a popular war,” said PFC Jonas Smith who was killed in Vietnam in 1970, “but I feel that my sacrifice was not made in vain and made the Russians think twice about expanding their empire into other countries.”

“I was a member of The Company,” said a deceased cold warrior who was using code for the CIA who added, “I am one of the stars you see when you first enter the CIA building. That means I gave my life fighting for my country against Communism but for security reasons I still can't give my name.”

- https://tinyurl.com/59d5md

“This election is an insult to all who ever fought to keep this country and the world free from socialism,” said the ex CIA spook who added, “I hope you suckers are ready to spread your wealth around.”

Comrade Ted State


Oh how I miss Ronnie!! He knew how to put the fear into the commies. I hope every day that we will find another person of courage, convictions, and love of his country, Already, the Russian President (Putin's puppet) has called out Obama. I'm sure that he will have company soon. Ahmadinejad, Chavez, Kim JongIl, will all be more than happy to contribute to the confusion that Obama and his several hundred National Security advisors will have to deal with.

your fellow comrade (worried for America),

Che' Gourmet

Thank you Che. I miss him too. The ony hope for Amercia is that after this Second Jimmy Carter presidency we produce a leader like Ronnie.

We could use Reagan right about now.

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Jack Büt
The Peoples Ruminator

Oh my.
Has anyone seen my gulag key?