Comrades,

Where do I begin? How about I start by telling you my head hurts and I am personally fed up with the “Bible” thumping fanatical zealots and their preaching on morality. Who are they to judge us? When will the Religious Reich accept the revealed truth of the Prophet Darwin and his dancing accordion wielding monkey disciples? How much more proof are these backward superstitious rednecks going to need to accept that we are right and they are wrong? *Sigh* Now you know why my head hurts so badly. Comrades, lets face the truth here, if they just abandoned all faith and realized that unrestrained monkey sex for millions of years produced us, we could then easily all go home happy and filled with the spirit of the revolution. This is not hard science, its progressive science™ which makes it easy to believe. Hmm, my phone is ringing; excuse me for a moment…

Chairman M.S Punchenko gossiping on the phone like a little school girl wrote:Chairman Meowsevich S. Punchenko speaking, how can I use you? Oh hello Jim! Yeah, yeah I'm fabulous, just fabulous, got that extra 100K this week. How are you doing? Oh really, well I always thought she was a whore anyways. Yeah, yeah she got around alright! HA! Heard she's been messing around with Pravda too. I know, must be the uniform and the extra potato ration, gets em' every time. So, what can I do for you Jim? Oh really, ya don't say. OK, well I will inform the collective of that… Say hello to your wife for me, OK now, buh-bye.” *click*

Ughh, I hate that S.O.B. To bad for him he doesn't know I'm seeing his wife. OK, where were we, oh yeah, Evolution™ and moral authority™. Well, I just learned from sissy-boy Jim that we are in fact converting to a more “faith” based persuasion – but weren't we the ones who accused the Reich of using the "Bible" for political reasons? I know; I just got done railing against them myself for being backward superstitious rednecks. But that was then and this is now and the nutroot's community has insisted we begin tricking and fooling the Religious Reich into crossing the line and joining the Party. Already our useful-idiots are in the transition process to appear "religious”. Will this work? I'm not sure. But I am happy for us to once again find another way to out hypocrite everyone.

REPENT SPENDERS! GOD/GODDESS/MAYTAG REPAIR(WO)MYN SAID SO!

(For all those wondering, the Maytag Repair(wo)myn is the Deity of all appliances, he/she/bag o' chips must be represented as well.)

Hallelujah,

Chairman M.S Punchenko

P.S - I am looking for a PS3, if anyone has any connections to a retailer just let me know. Thanks.

"When will the Religious Reich accept the revealed truth of the Prophet Darwin and his dancing accordion wielding monkey disciples?"

There are times when I believe myself to be the truthiest of truth-tellers, and then I see something like this and stand in awe.

Thank you Dr. Chimps. If I may blow smoke up your ass as well, I would say that I have the utmost respect for you and I'm very happy that you have decided to join the collective, I am also a huge fan of your work at Bush is Hitler and BlameBush!. I will also state that you will make a fine addition to the Pantheon of progressive thinkers -- joining the ranks of Dr. Palimpsest, Professor Kurgman and Dr. Archie B. Limpold.

P.S - I am looking for a PS3, if anyone has any connections to a retailer just let me know. Thanks.

I think one sold on Ebay for over 20,000 capitalist extortion units. Maybe if you blackmail someone, you could get one for free. I myself am waiting a few months until all the bugs are worked out, and better games come out. Although Resistance Fall of Man looks good.

Comrade Premier, this is an outrage! These unwashed little brats should have at least some shame! The PS3 is an appliance and a co-equal in our socialist utopia, it is just criminal to see so many be forced into servitude to appease the entertainment demands of their cruel masters! These gentle appliances have feelings Comrade Premier, they feel the painful jerking on their joysticks and the acidic sweat on their controllers -- this is murder and I must protest!
Ugh, now I'm disgusted and will have to go out now in the cold and confiscate one of these PS3's from some kid for the Common Good-- I must get my hands on one! I even heard they are coming out with GTA4!!! I must stop this senseless enjoyment..errhmm... I mean murder at once!

Turn in your PS3's to me! Help stop the murder! REPENT SPENDERS!

Yes, it is disturbing to the utmost degree. But the good news is that GTA 4 is set in the glorious people's utopia of Europe, and will be supported with online play. Unfortunately, the release date is unknown to me. Ratchet and Clank 5 will also be coming out, and Killzone 2 appears to be just an illusion.

I know! I can almost taste the satisfaction of driving on the wrong side of the road. Ahh yes, Euro-trash cars and pedestrians. I will miss Lazlo though, I did enjoy GTA talk radio.

Wait, Lazlo won't be there? NOOOOOOOOO! I think the best talk radio was in Vice City's VCPR with Maurice Chavez. Lazlo was also great with V Rock. Radio X in San Andreas sucked though.

Well I just don't see how an AmeriKKKan enemy of the people white pig like Lazlo could possibly fit in socialist Europe? So I am making the assumption he will not be in GT4. But how can they replace him? How!?

Maybe they will replace him with a stinky Frenchman with an annoying accent and a fetish for frog legs. Eeeewwww....

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:These gentle appliances have feelings Comrade Premier, they feel the painful jerking on their joysticks and the acidic sweat on their controllers -- this is murder and I must protest!

Comrade Chairman, O'Brien would be proud! Your radicalism is boundless. Have you considered writing S&M novellas for the amusement, and, better yet, bemusement of Oceania's proles? Distraction impedes reaction. We've got to keep them preoccupied, so that we can work in behalf of their Greater Good™.

On the "cutting edge" of Edukation,

--Dr. P

Yes Dr. Palimpsest, I have written many S&M book's in my more forminible years, much like our newly elected Senator Jim Webb has with his compelling journalistic detailing of the child-parent dynamic in Vietnam and Bangkok. Sadly enough though, I have stopped writing and have turned to film as my new medium.

I can only hope and pray/send good energy to the God(s)/Godess(s)/Maytag Repair(wo)myn(s) up above that someday the Religious Reich will accept our new turn to Progressive Faith and accept us within their orthodox congregations (so that we may tear it down from within). I really would like to show my films someday in a public venue -- like a church/temple/synagogue/Circuit City/Biology class or any other place of worship.

Drinking a glass of Propaganda and listening to Khachaturian,

Chairman Meowsevich S. Punchenko