The American Dream is About Receiving Our Fair Share

by Casserole Czar

What does it mean to get one's fair share in order to achieve the American Dream?

Getting our fair share means never keeping what we have earned, because by giving away what we have, we get what others have.

Getting our fair share means letting the stars shine on you instead of reaching out for them.

Getting our fair share means nationalized health care because everyone should get to be on a list. And the collective should know every detail about everyone's details.

Getting our fair share means letting all children receive the same level of education. All children should automatically receive a fifty percent on their tests.

Getting our fair share means giving the United Nations a chance to equalize us with other nations by sharing laws, police forces, and dental clinics.

Getting our fair share means walking our neighbors dog, because his dog is my dog. His crap is my crap.

Getting our fair share means public transportation for all. No one has the right to own one, let alone two cars, when some people have to ride the bus to the grocery store.

Getting our fair share means limiting quantities at the grocery store. Large cities are only allowed to have the same selection as a small rural community.

Getting our fair share means unequal taxation. No one must be taxed who is underpaid.

Getting our fair share means unions for everyone! State Sponsored Churches Pastors Union (Kim Chee!), Muslim Professors Union, Undocumented Lawn Care Workers Union, Drug Smugglers Union, Coyotes Union, Sea World Animals Union. (Only the military must not have a union, because their salaries must be kept in a reasonable range so the bankrupt government will be able to afford their services.)

Getting our fair share means being equally unprotected. No person shall bear arms, because that would make some people safer than others.

Getting our fair share means passing the lollipop around the playground so that all kids have the same germs.

Getting our fair share means no HOA's that put a strain on those with old clunkers approved People's Cars.

Getting our fair share means never having to say you're sorry. If someone apologizes, then everyone will feel like apologizing.

Getting our fair share means everyone receives a letter in the mail a week before the census, so that everyone will equally be anticipating next week's recycling day.

Getting our fair share means always having to say you're sorry for everything that you do because everyone's feelings will always never be hurt.

Getting our fair share means BBQ pits for everyone, so that wild boars roaming the dusty streets will be evenly roasted.

Getting our fair share means doing away with "illegal" status for visitors and residents. All citizens of the world must be equally welcome and receive their fair share of the fruits of democracy.

Getting our fair share means holding "terrorist" trials in all major cities. Why should some cities be humiliated and not others?

Getting our fair share means brand new equal opportunity housing in the inequally wealthy suburban neighborhoods.

Getting our fair share means serving prison sentences with the people who committed crimes against us.

Getting our fair share means that animals should be able to maim humans because animals are humans too.

Getting our fair share means that sea creatures receive the same amount of tax dollars as our school systems.

And above all, getting our fair share means whining incessantly when our whims are being trampled on by insensitive racist, capitalist, pigs.

Together, we can achieve the American Dream if we all stick together and let the government achieve the dream for us. It is the only way.


Brought to you by the Red Oven Mitts of America Union.

I commend you for an excellent debut post, Comrade CCCP! No wonder, you are the Casserole Czar. That's some casserole dish of relevant and meaningful examples of what the American Dream should truly be. I'm impressed. I bet Comrade Elliott will be impressed too, because even though he's from Minnesota, I bet he's never seen a casserole as well made as this one. And even though it's a casserole, that bon vivant Theocritus ought to find it quite tasty to his sophisticated palate.

My humble thanks, Leninka! I never would have tried it without your encouragement!

Casserole Czar! You take my CO2 away! What a debut!!! I know for a fact that Commissar Theocritus will go nuts about this! I thought I, Pamalinsky, would have something to add to this question! You said it all! My only choice left is to commend you most highly for your heart and fortitude! (Bravery) You speak for us all!!! Brilliant!!!! I'm so happy! Thank you for showing us how it's done! STUNNING! ABSOLUTELY STUNNING!!! YOU GAVE IT YOUR ALL!

[off] You brought tears to these eyes, my dear Casserole Czar. A hard thing to do when you are heart-broken and angry simultaneously. A much-needed release. You are an inspiration! I'm doing the same thing in my life. I've found another kindred spirit on The Cube! CHECK!

And more:

To get our fair share we must create the Man that will do it for us.

So I, we, created him from the best we could imagine; the hopes within us - what we could find from the dead: the lungs and the heart and the brain and the eyes from the dead bodies of those from the grave-yard. We create the new man, our leader, from our fond dreams. We put those in the body of the very best body and zap it with electricity and behold!

They say that only God can create life. But we can too. Built from our hopes and dreams and the best within us I, no we, have built from the grave-yards of our yearning the new man; he that can give us our fair share.

Some call him a monster. But he is mine - ours - our creation- for we have all taken from the dead bodies those parts laying fallow in our dreams and sewn those parts onto the body which we see.

Barack is built of those parts we gave him. That is his strength.

Behold! He is Frankenstien's monster, but he is yours too. We all made him from the pieces of the bodies of our dreams.

My Comrades!

Too long has Africa languished under Western Imperialisms! Now is the chance for Africa to get our Fair Share!

America and Europe must make amends to Africa for Slavery, Climate Change, Colonialism, Apartheid, Communism, Sexism and those nifty little Iphones we still can't get in Zimbabwe, IMMEDIATELY!

Amandla!

Obamugabe.

CCCP, I see that you have truly imbibed of the waters of progressive fairness. You have discovered the power of the words "fair" and "justice." Ignore entirely that none of your examples is either fair or just, and that you strung together a bunch of lines of pseudo-intelligent, self-entitled statism which would wreck anything that they were tried on.

I'm so proud of you.

Comrade Casserole Czar, an excellent first post. You have cemented your position here at the Cube like the burnt on residue of over baked macaroni and cheese.

But your post was so thorough that there is nothing more to add by way of comment. Where's our fair share? Ah, who am I kidding? I couldn't of thought of anything that clever. Good work.

Comrade Obamugabe, I recall that back when Clinton was our messiah in chief some African leaders were demanding 777 trillion dollars and 49 cents as slavery reparations from the rest of the world. They felt that slavery stole the best and brightest members of African society leaving the continent populated with a bunch of evolutionary throwbacks. Since that demand was made so long ago, I wonder what would be a fair price today (with interest and penalties)? I'm sure Obama could write you a check.

I should think that they would first look to the black African leaders who sold them into slavery in the first place. Or perhaps the Arabs who bought as many slaves for Arabia as were sent to the New World. And in the New World a black man is president, whereas in Arabia, they were by and large all murdered. I don't quite get how this turns into a recruiting tool for Islam though...

"Together, we can achieve the American Dream if we all stick together and let the government achieve the dream for us."

ah, yes, and look how well that worked out for the USSR. "Share'n is Care'n, Comrades!"

Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:"Share'n is Care'n, Comrades!"

Or, Share and Carry - a possible name for some iProg stores (invented by Commissar Theocritus).

They would be like the old Cash and Carry stores but at Share and Carry you don't use cash, you use fair sharing. When you go to the check out counter with your State produced iProgducts the young bored cashier, or sharier in this case, looks up your time schedule from the government's database of your life and calculates how much of your time you'll share doing work for the betterment of your community and what that work will be. This is your fair share.

Your fair share is scientifically calculated by the most sophisticated means with the most advanced government computer programs so you know your fair share is a completely unbiased assessment.

I'm not talking about a payment mind you. This isn't a transaction in the capitalist sense. You will have the choice to say no to this and not share - and still "Carry" the iProgduct home without sharing. This is choice. Choice is the most important Right a Prog has, and the State will support your right to choice. And you'll go on the prominently posted community list of people that refuse to give the community its fair share so that everyone will know that you are scum. It's all up to you because choice is the fundamental Right of every good red-blooded Prog.


Ask not what you will receive as your Fair Share, ask what your country's Fair Share of you is.

That's what your Fair Share is really all about.

Comrade this is a most equal post, but I fear it is lacking a few things mainly the spiritual and the cosmick side to collectivism. It is not enough to recieve one's fair share of wealth products and education one must also recieve your fair share of righteousness and heavenly balance.

So remember to get your fair share is to go to hell where the flames will roast us all equally in the fridged darkness. Heaven's light creates unequal shadows in which some are brighter then others but everyone will scream just as loudly in the ninth circle.

And also remember, getting your fair share means making do with less oxygen for a some time while the government invests in deprived and suppress worlds like Pluto which never had an atmosphere or Mars which lost it atmosphere to transgalactic capitalists.

Otis, now I understand a Fair Share. I was proposing that the only method of payment at Prog*Mart be something like the Lone Star Card. People use that here in Texas instead of money at grocery stores. It must be great value--since it won't buy dog food lots of dogs eat from the butcher's counter.

But shame is a good way of paying too. It binds us together.

Cx2 (I shall call you that, as my nickname here is 'C2'),

A most equal transmission- all things shall soon be FAIR. However, as your Superior Czar, and in the interest of Fairness, I must take full credit for this post; it may at first seem "unfair", but as all my best work's credit goes to my Superior, you need to redistruibute your success to me. Also, on a somewhat related note, we (you) need to have a brainstorming session on how to handle the distribution of excessive death among the elderly and sick- it hardly seems fair that so many of them should suffer from having Less Living, and others should enjoy so much. So if you could have the answers on my desk by Friday, that would be great; I could really use the kudos. - Czar Czar

Share and Share Alike...

Draft Proposal
Text of People's Party Organ Donor Card Mandate
All Rights Credited to the Party

WHEREAS the individual is beholden to the Greater Good and the Party is the guardian thereof, AND
WHEREAS there exists an unequal distribution of vital body parts, AND
WHEREAS from time to time it suits the needs of the Party to sell organs and various bodily parts on the left, AND
WHEREAS it is the patriotic duty of every Party member to give until it hurts and beyond,
BE IT THEREFOR RESOLVED:
1. All participants in ObamaCare will voluntarily sign up for a Party Organ Donor Card. Failure to comply will result in termination of all health benefits, confiscation of all property, and immediate execution.
2. Holders of the Party Organ Donor Card will surrender on demand by duly authorized Party Officials any and all such organs as are required by the State for the Greater Good.
3. Holders of the Party Organ Donor Card will be recognized for their contributions in the following manner:
--For the first major or the first two minor organs donated, the Card holder will receive five carbon offset credits and a certificate of compliance suitable for framing.
--For the second major or fourth minor organs donated, the Card holder will receive a lifetime bus pass good for free travel on all public transportation in Chicago during off-peak hours and an additional certificate of compliance suitable for framing.
--For the third major organ donated the Card holder will receive a full color picture of the beloved Dear Leader and a Xeroxed letter of appreciation signed with His own personal rubber stamp and an additional certificate of compliance suitable for framing.
--For each additional organ donated the Card holder will be allowed to jump forward two spaces in line at any Collective store and will receive a certificate of compliance suitable for framing.

Forgive me for the "groaner" dear Comrades, especially after viewing all of the most wonderful responses to our Casserole Czar! We can certainly agree on one thing...CCCP definitely created quite a STIR around here! No? I hope know CCCP is preening as we speak!(Gosh. I wish I could be CCCP.)

Ah, Fair and Share. The two most common words uttered by children and progressives. And as made progressives, we all know that sharing is the fairest way. That way nobody's feelings are hurt, and everyone is exactly the same, and has exactly the same. Now isn't that wonderful?

Comrades,

Does this mean we will have to re-label our Fair Trade goods as Fair Share? It's a very serious question for my local Coffee Parteé meeting of oppressed Caucasian-Americans.

I love it when all of our brains come together in a whirlwind of profundity for the cause! You all have brought me much laughter today. Thank you for your kind responses. And now, I shall get some replying done...

Ah, Fair and Share. The two most common words uttered by children and progressives. And as made progressives, we all know that sharing is the fairest way. That way nobody's feelings are hurt, and everyone is exactly the same, and has exactly the same. Now isn't that wonderful?

The best disservice service we can do for our kids is to expose them to new order ideas right away. Sharing is age old wisdom, but sharing FAIRLY takes a little extra discernment. We can pass this discernment on to our children when we exaggerate the importance of sharing and take advantage of their love of picture books to expose them to the relative truths of the revolution. Who could not want to be part of a revolution based on caring and sharing? Answer: Everyone except the closed-minded, sadistic, Constitutionalists. (spit,spit). Whatever we do, we must not read them children's versions of the Constitution. It would give them nightmares and make them confused. Bedtime bear books and Kangaroo lunches are just the thing to give them sweet dreams now and forevermmore.

1. All participants in ObamaCare will voluntarily sign up for a Party Organ Donor Card. Failure to comply will result in termination of all health benefits, confiscation of all property, and immediate execution.

The nice thing about Fair Share is that you don't have to wonder if you have to do it or not. It's just one more way to take the unfair stress, caused by capitalism, out of our lives. Any not-doers are not doing very well, so it makes the choice kind of easy. And easy is good. Isn't easy good?

3. Holders of the Party Organ Donor Card will be recognized for their contributions in the following manner:
--For the first major or the first two minor organs donated, the Card holder will receive five carbon offset credits and a certificate of compliance suitable for framing.
--For the second major or fourth minor organs donated, the Card holder will receive a lifetime bus pass good for free travel on all public transportation in Chicago during off-peak hours and an additional certificate of compliance suitable for framing.
--For the third major organ donated the Card holder will receive a full color picture of the beloved Dear Leader and a Xeroxed letter of appreciation signed with His own personal rubber stamp and an additional certificate of compliance suitable for framing.
--For each additional organ donated the Card holder will be allowed to jump forward two spaces in line at any Collective store and will receive a certificate of compliance suitable for framing.

This had my mind frolicking in the possibilities! I am a picture frame freak, so the more I can collect the better! The rewards of compliance are almost too many to imagine. (I feel like I am selling time-shares.) It will leave you speechless (after they remove your tongue as donation #3).

Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:"Together, we can achieve the American Dream if we all stick together and let the government achieve the dream for us."

ah, yes, and look how well that worked out for the USSR. "Share'n is Care'n, Comrades!"

Well, maybe "Share'n is CRAV'IN", Comrades. At this point, I know I can't do without it! Perhaps some "caring" comrade will give me an "intervention," maybe I'll even get a reality show deal, and I'll be able to SUE those suckers (not exactly sure who they are, who cares!) and be "set for life!"

---

I just thought of this, Comrades!...What if "Share'n is CRAV'IN" really means, "Shakin' is Bakin", I mean, who the hell knows! Uncertainty = chaos. With all this shakin' up of the citizenry PLUS the Global Warming thing...I, Pamalinsky, see some trouble comin':

Trouble, oh we got trouble, (Obama)
Right here in River City! (USA)
With a capital "T" (Tyranny!)
That rhymes with "P" (Pamalinsky)
And that stands for Pool, (Peloski)
That stands for pool. (Peloski)
We've surely got trouble! (Obama)
Right here in River City, (USA)
Right here! (Every state in the USA!)
Gotta figger out a way (States Rights!)
To keep the young ones moral after school! (States Rights!)
Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble...(It's up to us, our duty and obligation! Let's Friggin' Kick It!)

Aw, heyull, I don't know where to place the off or on button here. You decide for yourself!

A most equal transmission- all things shall soon be FAIR. However, as your Superior Czar, and in the interest of Fairness, I must take full credit for this post; it may at first seem "unfair", but as all my best work's credit goes to my Superior, you need to redistruibute your success to me. Also, on a somewhat related note, we (you) need to have a brainstorming session on how to handle the distribution of excessive death among the elderly and sick- it hardly seems fair that so many of them should suffer from having Less Living, and others should enjoy so much. So if you could have the answers on my desk by Friday, that would be great; I could really use the kudos. - Czar Czar

Since you are my Superior, I against my will willingly comply with your demand request. I only ask in return that you would share your RED Hot Babe with my brother who is kind of lonely these days. Share and share alike!

Forgive me for the "groaner" dear Comrades, especially after viewing all of the most wonderful responses to our Casserole Czar! We can certainly agree on one thing...CCCP definitely created quite a STIR around here! No? I hope know CCCP is preening as we speak!(Gosh. I wish I could be CCCP.)

Comrade Pamalinski,
Thank you for your generous words of encouragement! You convey your warmth and enthusiasm well. It was pretty fun putting this post together. Now I will be on the lookout for some more ideas... Back to the drawing board butcher block table!

Or, Share and Carry - a possible name for some iProg stores (invented by Commissar Theocritus).

They would be like the old Cash and Carry stores but at Share and Carry you don't use cash, you use fair sharing. When you go to the check out counter with your State produced iProgducts the young bored cashier, or sharier in this case, looks up your time schedule from the government's database of your life and calculates how much of your time you'll share doing work for the betterment of your community and what that work will be. This is your fair share.

Your fair share is scientifically calculated by the most sophisticated means with the most advanced government computer programs so you know your fair share is a completely unbiased assessment.

I'm not talking about a payment mind you. This isn't a transaction in the capitalist sense. You will have the choice to say no to this and not share - and still "Carry" the iProgduct home without sharing. This is choice. Choice is the most important Right a Prog has, and the State will support your right to choice. And you'll go on the prominently posted community list of people that refuse to give the community its fair share so that everyone will know that you are scum. It's all up to you because choice is the fundamental Right of every good red-blooded Prog.


Ask not what you will receive as your Fair Share, ask what your country's Fair Share of you is.

That's what your Fair Share is really all about.

This is brilliant and should stand alone as a new thread! I would like to see some IMAGES of this. I am picturing the Share and Carry stores...with closeups on the sharier and the bags to carry home products in. Please GIVE ME MORE!

And I will ask what my country's fair share of me is, right before I go shine up my arms. I mean scrub the dirt off the day.

I should think that they would first look to the black African leaders who sold them into slavery in the first place. Or perhaps the Arabs who bought as many slaves for Arabia as were sent to the New World. And in the New World a black man is president, whereas in Arabia, they were by and large all murdered. I don't quite get how this turns into a recruiting tool for Islam though...

(Are you all getting sick of my long-winded responses yet? It's just that it's my first post and I am feeling kind of giddy. But I will wrap it up soon so I can get some sleep since I stayed up way too late last night workin' on this thing...)

Theocritus! I'm not sure about the whole Islam question. But what I do know is that when I googled images of the American Dream, it came up with a few comic strip type of pictures that were in Arabic and had Muslim men in airport lines and Muslim women at a laundromat, I think. I tried to save them, but it didn't work for some reason. And I couldn't read Arabic, so it didn't matter anyway...I could try to send them to you for interpretation?

Comrade Casserole Czar, an excellent first post. You have cemented your position here at the Cube like the burnt on residue of over baked macaroni and cheese.

Aw, shucks, Comrade Whoopie! They say eggs and cheese are the hardest things to scrub off, and beings that I have lots of experience with washing casserole dishes, I would have to agree! So I guess I'm here to stay, unless someone gets one of those industrial strength power washer thingys that we used in the back of the buffet restaurant I used to work at...

America and Europe must make amends to Africa for Slavery, Climate Change, Colonialism, Apartheid, Communism, Sexism and those nifty little Iphones we still can't get in Zimbabwe, IMMEDIATELY!

I love it!

Send your requests immediately to:
Paul Somebody, Director of Census Bureau Stuff
United States Commerce Dept., Economics and Statistics
DC, USA 666666

Attn: Head Guy who likes that his name was put on the letter that went out a week ago.
Subject: Bring your fairness over here.

Does this mean we will have to re-label our Fair Trade goods as Fair Share? It's a very serious question for my local Coffee Parteé meeting of oppressed Caucasian-Americans.

Getting our fair share also means that we are all equally oppressed, unless you are Caucasian, then not so much. Nevertheless, we fairly share the burden of inequality though we may not all feel inequally oppressed.

Also, Fair Share means that after you share a cup of your fairly traded coffee with friends around the table, you then share the used grounds back around the world, to those that may not have had their own fair trade coffee even though they picked it themself. The taxpayers will pick up the tab, so don't hesitate sending those grounds Priority Mail/One Day Air so that those grounds get there before the mold sets in.

Barack is built of those parts we gave him. That is his strength.

Behold! He is Frankenstien's monster, but he is yours too. We all made him from the pieces of the bodies of our dreams.

Yes, we will share in the wrath of the monster. We must make sure ALL comrades appreciate the monster as much as we do. If they do not, well, we need something to feed to the monster to keep him alive!

And also remember, getting your fair share means making do with less oxygen for a some time while the government invests in deprived and suppress worlds like Pluto which never had an atmosphere or Mars which lost it atmosphere to transgalactic capitalists.

Ooo! Ooo! Let me share too! I'd like a condo on Mars someday!

ah, yes, and look how well that worked out for the USSR. "Share'n is Care'n, Comrades!"

Comrade Pulloskies,
The USSR is the supreme model for the USSA. We must track it's footsteps closely, so as to align ourselves with the force that brought about its creation and its demise.

Did I miss anybody? This is great fun!

I'm going overboard, right? Well, as my Grandma would say, "Goody for me." (I've never figured out if she means it sarcastically or not...she says it in sort of a half-congratulatory way.) Unsolved mysteries...

Casserole Czar wrote:Did I miss anybody? This is great fun!

I'm going overboard, right? Well, as my Grandma would say, "Goody for me." (I've never figured out if she means it sarcastically or not...she says it in sort of a half-congratulatory way.) Unsolved mysteries...

---

YOUR FUN IS MY FUN! You, dear CCCP, deserve many kudos! My opinion is that you struck a nerve in all of us progs. And you friggin' deserved your kudos! Part of my "evolution" as a virgin prog has always been...am I going over the "top?" I had, and still do sometimes, wonder if I have adequately separated my commentary from my kommentary. I do care so much about what I submit here. I sometimes "dread" my responses the next day! (not so much now) Never once has anyone on this site given me reason to do so. Never once. To me, The Cube is a stunning array of people I have always wanted to meet...but couldn't. Now I can, and have! Frankly, I consider myself in "privileged" company. So to speak.

Not to worry, CCCP, you have set the new bar! I am inspired by you!
Thanks, Pammie.
I always do better when someone is "better" than me!

I, like you, (not to speak for you, though), have found a sanctuary here with kindred spirits everywhere! All over the world. You should look up the actual founder of this site, Oleg! Google the People's Cube. You'll find it, and Oleg's last name. He puts most Americans to shame! He loves our country as we do! I actually have become more focused here on the Cube, and in my life, just by speaking my mind! I kid you not! I'm stronger somehow. Never saw that coming. Congratulations!

Casserole Czar, I am absolutely dazzled by what you've presented! Therefore, allow me to present something in return: You are hereby the latest recipient of Pinkie's prestigious Beet of the Week Award!


And a bumpersticker for your mother:

You'll also enjoy use of the "Reserved for Beet of the Week" parking space in front of Party headquarters. Plus you get free gift certificates to Jiffi-Lobo and Pup's Pleasure Party Palace (both non-transferable, blackout dates apply).

Oh yes, and don't forget to cook yourself a beet casserole, since that's part of the awards package.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Casserole Czar, I am absolutely dazzled by what you've presented! Therefore, allow me to present something in return: You are hereby the latest recipient of Pinkie's prestigious Beet of the Week Award! . . . .
You'll also enjoy use of the "Reserved for Beet of the Week" parking space in front of Party headquarters. Plus you get free gift certificates to Jiffi-Lobo and Pup's Pleasure Party Palace (both non-transferable, blackout dates apply).

I have a prog question from the collective ~ is this "fair" and "equal"? By that I mean, if only a particular few, receive these awards,and receive it for some perceived accomplishment.. Beet awards? This feels much too capitalist and competitive and we know that causes or can cause: pride, increased self-worth, a desire to work independently, aspirations

to become self-reliant & self sufficient . . . . and probably climate change.

I know you have well meaning intentions, (and intentions are all that truly matter to us open-minded, caring Progs) but speaking for the collective, our fellow comrades and the oppressive Obama administration spy's, I have concerns.

CCCP, you've received Pinkie's Beet of the Week award! I'm a most equal comrade here and I've only received it once, in public. (I received it in advance for some work that I'm doing on Prog*Mart, which is one-stop shopping for all things progerrific.)

Beet of the Week. You should frame that. Because with Pinkie it's either Beet of the Week or a severe headache from her shovel.

Comrade Pulloskies,

You brought up the opportunity for a Teachable Moment. So here is your Teachable Moment message of the day:

In the mother country, years ago, when supervisors couldn't get workers to do much, on account of them not being paid diddly squat, they brought in what where called "Shock Workers" and "Shock Brigades." Shock Workers came in, worked their asses off, and either through inspiration or shame, would bring production levels up. In other words, with their actions, they would say: "Look at me! Look how hard I'm working, you lazy bums!" They were written up in newspapers, etc., for their efforts, and there was actual "socialist competition." This, I know, from a book entitled "Stalinism as a Way of Life." They even had what was called "The First Congress of Shock Brigades." Now, of course, this competition is never to be confused with capitalist competition. It's not at all (cough, cough), the same thing. No, not at all.

Commissar Theocritus wrote: Because with Pinkie it's either Beet of the Week or a severe headache from her shovel.

Yeah, the only award I ever got from her is Beat Down of the weak.

Leninka wrote:Comrade Pulloskies,

You brought up the opportunity for a Teachable Moment. So here is your Teachable Moment message of the day:

In the mother country, years ago, when supervisors couldn't get workers to do much, on account of them not being paid diddly squat, they brought in what where called "Shock Workers" and "Shock Brigades." Shock Workers came in, worked their asses off, and either through inspiration or shame, would bring production levels up. In other words, with their actions, they would say: "Look at me! Look how hard I'm working, you lazy bums!" They were written up in newspapers, etc., for their efforts, and there was actual "socialist competition." This, I know, from a book entitled "Stalinism as a Way of Life." They even had what was called "The First Congress of Shock Brigades." Now, of course, this competition is never to be confused with capitalist competition. It's not at all (cough, cough), the same thing. No, not at all.

Thank you, dearest Leninka, for your brave, well thought out and precise explanation. I denounce myself and beg forgiveness from Commiss Pinkie. I am not jealous or envious of these delectable beet awards (*I wonder if they'll buy that?) only slightly weary of holing, not to be confused with "whor'n", beets and reaping no rewards.
It is a great relief to know we're not indulging in greedy capitalism but in sharing Stalinism. joy, oh joy. *spit spit

Fraulein, I always share my Stalinism, just as I was always sure to share cold sores, and other sores that I had. If they were good enough for me, why not others?

And there is something to be said in comparing Stalinism to festering, weeping sores and lesions. Ask Meow. He'll tell you. I cannot tell you how many times I've sworn by Meow's weeping sores and lesions.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Fraulein, I always share my Stalinism, just as I was always sure to share cold sores, and other sores that I had. If they were good enough for me, why not others?

And there is something to be said in comparing Stalinism to festering, weeping sores and lesions. Ask Meow. He'll tell you. I cannot tell you how many times I've sworn by Meow's weeping sores and lesions.

Truly, this is only fair! What a freak'nbrave comrade you are, to share all YOU HAV. I commend you and, yes, dare I say, offer you,Comrade
Theocritus
,THE award!

Wear your beet withpride humility. . . proud humility.

Oh. My. God. Fraulein, I am very impressed by your generosity, but <i>do you know what Pinkie does if someone steps into her territory?</i>

Oh. This is fraught with danger. Do you want a babushka with a mean shovel arm, her blood-red eyes glittering balefully at you with that thousand-yard stare, just waiting for you to relax your attention just a little bit?

Run, Fraulein! Run! Run! Before it's too late! Run!

Now normally I would offer the use of a wormhole to go hide in a nice safe Stalin era Gulag during winter in Siberia, so that the good Fraulein could escape the wrath of Pinkie. But that wouldn't be Fair(TM) and Pinkie does so love to Share(TM) the whackings of her shovel, does she not? So in the interests of Fair(TM) and Share(TM) I won't.

oops . . . . . . (quickly! quickly!!)


Dear Commissar Theocritus, I'm sure you'll understand if I have NO idea to what you're referring?

Colonel 7.62 ~ m sure Comrade Pinkie has many glorious, outstanding, and most HUMBLE qualities, sharing and caring, among the top. . . but again, I'm sure I have NO idea to what you refer. gulp

My Comrades

As Beloved Leader and Tyranical Dictator of the People's Paradise of Zimbabwe I have to say that Fraulein Pellosskies has truly overstepped the boundaries of Proledom here.

-- She is Envious of Casserole Czar's Beet Award.

Envy is a very essential emotion for every prole and we have to do everything in our power to instill our proles with Envy, especially Class Envy, Race Envy, Gender Envy, Healthcare Envy, Carbon Footprint Envy, SUV Envy and Pianist Envy. But I must point out that Envy of Casserol Csar's Beet Award does not fall into any of the Party Approved Classes of Class Envy. Envy of a Made Prog and Party Member cannot be tolerated. If everybody were a chief Comrade Native Leader then who would be the IndiansComrade Native Proles? Being envious of Party members is a serious thoughtcrime!

--She stole the Beet Award and awarded it to Theocritus.

Stealing is a most Excellent Prog Value. We learnt that lesson from the People's Hero Comrade Robin Hood. That is the basis of redistribution of wealth. But again, Stealing is only allowed 1) By the State 2) For the People 3) From Enemies of the People like Middle Aged White Men. Since CC is neither middle aged, nor white (She is Party Approved Demi Asian American) nor Male, stealing from her is Not Allowed.

I hereby suggest that the Fraulein should be investigated!

Amandla!

Obamugabe

Fraulein, Obamugabe does have a point. And my heart fills with gratitude, and tears leak out of the corners of this old socialist's rheumy eyes at your award. And I do thank you.

But the award is <i>Pinkie's</i>. I can handle Pupovich's Talent Shitting Pigeons. I can handle Pupovich's Nano Jimmy Carter Rabbits. I can even handle Bruno when he's keening over tickets to a Barbra concert, which he ain't getting in this world. But there is no force on earth which can handle Pinkie, especially a Pinkie hung over from Putinka vodka, when she's in a towering rage.

You are a newly minted comrade and we welcome you to our collective bosom.

Just make sure you stay alive to enjoy it.

Well if you decide you don't want to face the good Commissarka, look for a wormhole inside your refrigerator. Oh, tasty beets BTW.

All right, what's going on here?

Fraulein Pulloskies: While I do appreciate the prog spirit inherent in your intention to redistribute Beet of the Week to Theocritus, the fact remains that only I am authorized to do that as we have no agency in place at this time that would allow me to appoint bureaucrats deputies to award BOTW in my stead, place, absence, or Lenin forbid, my incapacitation and Whoopie stop snickering under your breath or YOU'LL be the one incapacitated!

Fraulein, I charged you with establishing a Vodka Party. Where is it?

I've had just about enough of your shenanigans, Fraulein. This is your final warning. Yes, I know you've received final warnings already from Theocritus and Leninka and Obamugabe and at least sixteen other Party members, but this is your final warning from ME!

And YOU, Theocritus! Not so fast! I see you trying to tippy-toe your way out the door, but I fear the jingling of too much coin in your pockets betrays your treachery in more ways than one. Acting as her lookout! "Psst, Fraulein, quick, here comes Pinkie, delete the beet and cross everything out! Positions, everyone! Shovels up! Everyone look busy, now shhhhh!"

WHACK!!!

Now get up off the floor and pick up your teeth. And the coins that just spilled out of your pockets. Now give them to me. No, not the teeth, the coins. Last I heard, the Whack-A-Prole machine at the Kiddieland Arcade at Jiffi-Lobo still doesn't accept teeth.

And as for you, Whoopie . . .

WHACK!!!

That's for laughing at other people's misfortunes.

And you, Obamugabe . . .

WHACK!!!

Yeah, I know you're trying to play the bad cop in hopes of currying my favor, pointing your finger at Fraulein while keeping a perfectly straight, stern face. But I also know it's all you can do to keep from laughing in mine.

You all disgust me.

Pamalinsky: Get over here and clean up after your so-called sworn protectors. There's blood and mucus and what looks like a lot of spilled Gatorade all over the floor. Well, at least they didn't break the lock on my Putinka cabinet again.

Now just a minute, Pinkie. I try and try and try to be a good prog and good friend to all progressives everywhere. I did try to warn the estimable Fraulein of her danger, since she is a newly minted prog, and what do I get?

Contrecoup trauma and lacerations, that's what. You'd think that I was a Republipuke the way you go after me.

Wasn't it enough that I send you my last batch of Nano Jimmy Carter rabbits? And also I gave you, and only <i>you</i>, the last of my talent-shitting pigeons. (For our new comrades, <a href="https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopi ... rt=0">here are the talent-shitting pigeons.</a>)

Pinkie, since I can no longer please you, as a last-ditch effort I'll, well, I'll go ahead and do it.

I'm sending you Bruno. No, no, no, don't bother to thank me. I would only release Bruno to a valued and trusted Comrade such as you. And, just as a formality, what is your billing address so that I may give it to Amex?

Because that's the kind of prog that I am.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:All right, what's going on here?

Fraulein Pulloskies: While I do appreciate the prog spirit inherent in your intention to redistribute Beet of the Week to Theocritus, the fact remains that only I am authorized to do that as we have no agency in place at this time that would allow me to appoint bureaucrats deputies to award BOTW in my stead, place, absence, or Lenin forbid, my incapacitation and Whoopie stop snickering under your breath or YOU'LL be the one incapacitated!

Fraulein, I charged you with establishing a Vodka Party. Where is it?

.

I throw myself on the gulag floor, Commissarka Pinkie. In all humility, I can only say I was unaware and uninformed, as all good Progs are, of any and all broken rules. I was only following the progressive thought & deeds, of stealing and claiming another works, as my own. sniff sniff I did only intend to dutiful redistribute said Beet Award.
I shall remain on the gulag floor, muttering extolling the glories of collectivedom, as long as necessary.

I am, at present, assembling a vodka par'ta to end all par'tas... if so deemed correctly, by the collective, of course.

your proud humble comrade, Fraulein P

Very well, Fraulein. Now kindly maintain your position on the floor so I don't slip and fall in any of the blood and mucus while I address Theocritus.

Theocritus, if you really want to get on my good side, then give Bruno to Pamalinsky. She seems to fancy herself as some sort of latter day Norma Desmond what with the constant obsessing over her avatar ("Oh, Mr. Red Square, I'm ready for my closeup") and I think Bruno would make the perfect Joe Gillis, if not one of her "waxworks."

Or failing that, the chimpanzee.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Very well, Fraulein. Now kindly maintain your position on the floor so I don't slip and fall in any of the blood and mucus while I address Theocritus.

Theocritus, if you really want to get on my good side, then give Bruno to Pamalinsky. She seems to fancy herself as some sort of latter day Norma Desmond what with the constant obsessing over her avatar ("Oh, Mr. Red Square, I'm ready for my closeup") and I think Bruno would make the perfect Joe Gillis, if not one of her "waxworks."

Or failing that, the chimpanzee.

(mutter mutter) Oh yeah, I would lovingly adore to be of service (spit) dear Comrade! No need for precious dearest Comrade, to get any nasty rebellious blood and mucus on himself! Could I ask who died and made you king?

The chimp? Oh. I know which one you mean. Once in Gollyvornia Bruno begged me to take him by Whacko Jacko's house, and I did. Michael's chimp saw Bruno in full Carmen Miranda drag, and it scared him shitless. Which was such an astonishing feat--Michael kept people on staff for cleaning up the chimp's feces--that Michael was overcome with gratitude and started to beckon us inside Neverland.

Then the pineapple on Bruno's head fell off, and knocked off Michael's nose.

It was downhill for poor Michael after that. Bruno is the proximate cause of Michael's death.

And in my household I'm doing the Norma Desmond stuff. When I had my echocardiogram, I said, "Jill, I'm ready for my closeup." Same for chest x-rays. I won't let them do full-body x-rays though. There's some information that I don't want out. Did you know that a CAT-scan can read "Loom of the Fruit"?

Fraulein Pulloskies:

WHACK!!!

Let THAT be your final warning, and this time we really, really mean it! Do you hear me, comrade? This is the end game for you, Fraulein Pulloskies, and you are really, really pushing it now.

Something tells me you'll be lying on that floor for a long time to come.

Theocritus: If you really, REALLY want to get on my good side, then drag her out of here and bring her before the (ahem) Reconciliation Committee.

Not to break the mood here, (because it is hilariously uncomfortable) but I wanted to thank Commissarka Pinkie for not redistributing my BOTW Award. I do appreciate it very much. As I said earlier, I am a sucker for picture frames, and usually they just hang on the wall empty, but now I have another BOTW to hang next to my very first one which I received many moons ago. I had its beetprints put into a plaster cast and hung it next to it!

Just when you think you couldn't love a BOTW more than your first one, your capacity grows and can encompass ALL the awards that come your way. When RED frames are on sale at the Share N Carry, I pick up a few, you know, just to be ready. (Sometimes, I photoshop myself into famous statist moments, like the burning of censored things, and slip them into place...It's just this thing I do.)

I plan on spending some quality time with my kitchen tonight to make a special pie for myself. It will not be as glorious as the lofty one I made for Commissarka Pinkie, but it will have mint beets and it will have chocolate beets. Nuf said.

And I'm sorry to Whoopie for getting the Beat of the weak...

Casserole Czar wrote: Together, we can achieve the American Dream if we all stick together and let the government achieve the dream for us. It is the only way.
Brought to you by the Red Oven Mitts of America Union.

Comrade Casserole Czar
Most commendable, you are indeed a true Prog!
I wanted to join in the almostunanimous congratulations to you for your first glorious posting! Of course it goes without saying that to receive Commissarka Pinkie's BOTWA is truly most impressive! I will drink a toast to you! (as soon as Fraulein Pulloskies gets that vodka party organized! my rations have unaccountably disappeared again.)

Is your union part of SEIU yet? Be aware they may make you switch to purple mitts.

(This floor is really yucky!)

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:All right, what's going on here?

Pamalinsky: Get over here and clean up after your so-called sworn protectors. There's blood and mucus and what looks like a lot of spilled Gatorade all over the floor. Well, at least they didn't break the lock on my Putinka cabinet again.

Commissarka Pinkie,

I mean, like...EWE! I'm not cleaning this mess up! I'm not responsible for the screw-ups of Obamgabe or Theocritus here, I mean, this ain't blood or mucus OR Gatorade! It's friggin' Radiator Fluid or Tranny Fluid, which looks EXACTLY like Gatorade! It's got that iridescent look. I mean whatEVER! It's just, well, ICKY! EEEEEWE! By the way, have I ever mentioned how I love to play with matches? Hmmm? Just a thought.

And, most esteemed Commissarka Pinkie, just to make sure you give me a "pass" on this, I, Pamalinsky, offer you this, in my response to your "emergency." (it is most relevant to your Putinka supply. Wink! Wink!) Take it! Take It! TAKE IT! PULEEEZE! (I got nothing else to offer):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJezzWxP13A<br>

Casserole Czar wrote:Not to break the mood here, (because it is hilariously uncomfortable)

And I'm sorry to Whoopie for getting the Beat of the weak...

Yeah, I know what you mean CC. All I can say is I don't deserve this.

I am both stunned and delighted as I look at the mangled carnage lying in the wake of Pinkie's mighty shovel. Stunned by the damage inflicted with such a simple tool by such a sweet and dulcet flower of New Soviet Womanhood, delighted that I have been able to contribute to this thread without being in the path of said implement and flower.

Commissar Theocritus wrote: Did you know that a CAT-scan can read "Loom of the Fruit"?

Ha! Not in your case, dear Theo! Your CAT-scan will CONFUSE any computer! You certainly fooled me! (And, I ain't no damned computer!) We both know exactly what your attributes are here, Sir, n'est pas? You might want to call upon Calvin or Hobbes for help here. You'll get the most accurate answer. (Just a suggestion.)

Actually, I truly enjoyed the way you escorted me into the ways of The Cube. I truly admire your grace in doing so. You allowed me to "fall in love with you" without a flinch! Knowing, full well, this could never be. Love the way you told me this. You even had me believe you have actual affection for me, as well. I'd like to think you do. You consistently embody the best in all of us. I do truly love you for that!

Love,
Pammie

Casserole Czar wrote: Since you are my Superior, I against my will willingly comply with your demand request. I only ask in return that you would share your RED Hot Babe with my brother who is kind of
lonely these days. Share and share alike!

(Sigh.) Have you learned NOTHING today? Methinks that BOTW has gone straight to yer head Cx2. What is this 'asking in return"???? As if I owe you something? Have ye already forgotten the Golden Rule of Prog Fairness? "What's yours is mine, and what's mine is mine"! And while you are at it, tell your snivveling brother to find his own mate. Unless he's cute- I might make him part of my harem. If he pleaseth me fancy.

And while you are at it, tell your snivveling brother to find his own mate.

It was worth a shot!

Stunned by the damage inflicted with such a simple tool by such a sweet and dulcet flower of New Soviet Womanhood, delighted that I have been able to contribute to this thread without being in the path of said impliment and flower.

Sounds like a tornado to me. An object that first inspires awe, then strikes terror into the minds of those lingering outside of the barn. "Dang it, Martha!! We should have built the tornado shelter FIRST, instead of the outhouse! Get those pigs out of the ditch--we're going into that culvert!"

I will drink a toast to you! (as soon as Fraulein Pulloskies gets that vodka party organized! my rations have unaccountably disappeared again.)

Is your union part of SEIU yet? Be aware they may make you switch to purple mitts.

I would love to get invited to a vodka party. The Mike's Lemonade is the only thing we've had in the Kollective Kitchen fridge for some time now. (It's not the real thing, we had to recycle some, uh, yellow stuff and add some beet fizz so it would taste "hard" to drink.) Where does a good vodka party take place? Is it like a traveling supper where we have one round of vodka at one comrade's house, then move onto the next and have round two there, and so on? Or do we just hunker down in the rubble and light a fire?

Purple mitts, over my burnt casserole! We have more hired thugs than them (weren't they called "pinkertons"--is that where Pinkie gets her name?) and will draw a line on the greasy kitchen floor. Step over it and it won't only be the mitts that are RED! (The ONLY thing that might change my mind is a memo from Dear Leader himself.)

Speaking of verbal miracles from Dear Leader's mouth and his underlings:

I was inspired by a poster I saw in the window of a Teacher's Supply store today. In all his pleasant smiling, arrogant beauty his quote rang out from the single dimensioned paper! "There's not a liberal America and a conservative America, there's only a United States of America!" Applause and raptures! Buy this poster now, Educators of the World! There is nothing better suited for classroom use! (The one for sale in the Guns and Ammo Supply store read, "If you're not for us, you're against us!")

I know, I know--you're thinking that I had a really lucky day. But it gets better. The back side of the Census billboard that said, "If I don't say it, who will say it for me?" said, "A Journey of Many Voices. Census 2010." With a picture of an old Chinese lady and a young boy beside her. Of course, since I am demi-Asian, I loved it and felt valued and understood. But would you please translate it for me? I only speak Chinese...

Ivan Betinov wrote:I am both stunned and delighted as I look at the mangled carnage lying in the wake of Pinkie's mighty shovel. Stunned by the damage inflicted with such a simple tool by such a sweet and dulcet flower of New Soviet Womanhood, delighted that I have been able to contribute to this thread without being in the path of said impliment and flower.

Yes, our dear Commissarka must be sobering up feeling generous. Usually she just whacks everyone, and then finds reasons later.

Nika, you say your rations have been disappearing. Let's think on this. You're a prog in good standing. So obviously you drunk them, passed out and forgot about it. Enough said.

Of course you don't deserve it, Whoopie. Nor do I. Bear in mind, I was <i>just sneaking out of the room</i>. Now I ask you. Is there anything on earth which is more proglike than sneaking, skulking, and fading into the woodwork? That is when throwing people under the bus and off the speaker's stand and out of the driver's seat just isn't on right then.

So what if you didn't do it? This will build a good prog character in you. You'll be forever resentful of it, and will take it out on innocent people, a lot like, oh, Axelrod, Emanuel, and even His Most High and Mighty Loftiness, President Awesome Zero.

Remember: being a prog means never having to have a reason.

Pamalinski, how could I not do my uttermost (not to be confused with Roseanne's bosom) to make sure that all our new comrades ascend properly into the ways of perfect progdom? I never know if I will need someone at my back as I swindle a trust fund. As I bribe a council to demand a service that I sell. As I panic people and propose myself as the solution. It is at times like these that we need all the good progs that we can get.

And never, NEVER, believe it when some Rethuglican says that the only good prog is a dead prog.

CCCP wrote:There's not a liberal America and a conservative America, there's only a United States of America!

Indeed. This is the sort of politics that I like--bringing people together. If we have 74% of the DNA of a yeast cell, then surely we have at least 30% of the DNA of a Rethuglican.

(It's funny but it was a Rethuglican who pointed that out to me, and then turned away laughing. Wonder why.)

I wonder why the Repukes won't work with us in a bipartisan fashion. I mean, it's not like they need to read the bills before voting for them. It's not like they need to know anything before voting for what we tell them to vote for. As usual, the Repukes are being obstructionist.

I'VE HAD IT WITH ALL OF YOU!
Cease and Desist! What a bunch of quibbling little progs! Disgusting!!! All you want to do is "one-up" each other with your purported "wit". The only prog who has been decent about this is...CCCP!!!! Around whom you all quibble! What a disgusting lot! And, Theo, you posted several times in a row! You must feel very threatened! I never thought I would see this from you. Especially when you have seen, and now ignore, my heartfelt posts, right on this thread! Commissarka Pinkie is right! You ALL deserve a thorough whacking! And, I mean THOROUGH! I, Pamalinsky, have been played for a SUCKER! By those I have trusted!

Pamalinsky, I haven't ignored your heartfelt posts at all. In fact Red Star's goons highly trained officers are on their way to your dacha now. To assist you with your packing.

Dear Pammie, my eyes fill with tears again, to think how you've grown. From shy little progling to towering and completely unjustified rage. I just may send a clipping of this to Jeremiah Wright. I'm sure he'd have you up on the front pew.

I may consider you for an honor, a signal one for someone so young. I may put you up for a, pardon while I look both ways, a <i>show trial</i>. Would you like a show trial? You'd get a good kangaroo court, a drunken public defender, and the judges would be some old Germans we called out of retirement in Brazil.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Pamalinsky, I haven't ignored your heartfelt posts at all. In fact Red Star's goons highly trained officers are on their way to your dacha now. To assist you with your packing.

Dear Pammie, my eyes fill with tears again, to think how you've grown. From shy little progling to towering and completely [HIGHLIGHT=#ffff00]unjustified rage[/HIGHLIGHT]. I just may send a clipping of this to Jeremiah Wright. I'm sure he'd have you up on the front pew.

I may consider you for an honor, a signal one for someone so young. I may put you up for a, pardon while I look both ways, a <i>show trial</i>. Would you like a show trial? You'd get a good kangaroo court, a drunken public defender, and the judges would be some old Germans we called out of retirement in Brazil.

[HIGHLIGHT=#ffff00]Unjustified rage?[/HIGHLIGHT] How condescending! I don't need no damn dacha goons helping me with my packing! They should beware of what I, Pamalinsky, am actually packing!
I'm fed up with all of you! And actually, Theo, you most definitely HAVE ignored my heartfelt posts. I, Pamalinsky, know you are movin' on to other "conquests". Just don't lie about it! I don't mind at all, but, I really hate it when you lie to me!

Komissarka Pinkie

I go to sleep a happy man, and when I wake up I see that during the night you voilently attacked ME, THE LOVING TYRANT OF A WHOLE COUNTRY with your Blunt Tool of Proledom!

While I have only the most equal respect for your most equalness I must tell you Comrade, that I will not stand being treated with the same equality as less equal proles.

Now read my lips. There is a lot of space in the dark hole under the People's Commode.

Amandla!

Obamugabe

Obamugabe wrote:Komissarka Pinkie

I go to sleep a happy man, and when I wake up I see that during the night you voilently attacked ME, THE LOVING TYRANT OF A WHOLE COUNTRY with your Blunt Tool of Proledom!

While I have only the most equal respect for your most equalness I must tell you Comrade, that I will not stand being treated with the same equality as less equal proles.

Now read my lips. There is a lot of space in the dark hole under the People's Commode.

Amandla!

Obamugabe

---

Don't worry, Sir, I, Pamalinsky, always tell my friends, "Ya Just Gotta Love Obamugabe!"
As I do, Sir. By the way, Sir, is the proper reply...Alawehtu! Did I spell this correctly? I know it's something like that, and would like to show you my respect when addressing you. Sir.

Without the "l", dear girl. Your Prole-feric enthusiasm is noted, Comrade Pamalisnksy. You have a bright future in the Party. Just stay alive.

Obamugabe wrote:Without the "l", dear girl. Your Prole-feric enthusiasm is noted, Comrade Pamalisnksy. You have a bright future in the Party. Just stay alive.

I will Sir. Just for you. And thanks. Awehtu!

Great Stalin's Ghost!!! What a MASSA MESS!!! Glorious Casserole Czar and a glorious thread all around.

There are more fur balls in this thread than the Chinese cookery I once ate at while visiting Comrade Mao. Yes, yes, I know what your thinking comrades, CHICKEN FEED!!!! But I worn you, one bite and your teeth will break off right at the nubbins!

Comrade Pamalinski has shot her wad once again in an attempt to gain favor from our progressive spirits, but this poor poor prole needs 20 years in the Wright Church to really get it down! Feel me? I agreed Brother Obamugabe, this bastard "I" she breaths is only found in neo-kulak debauchery! We are The Party Prole Pamalinsnky, what the The Party concurs WE follow!!!

On the other hand, Heir Fraulein Pulloskies, is hot for teacher! And that's something a Made Prog such as myself can admire... it is always important to take your shovel whacking with grace, else that angry black woman will have you hoeing beets in Siberia.

And to our ever lovely and most favored Commissarka and Leninka may Marx bless your shovels. Once again The Wombat Factory(TM) is not only inspired but indebted to the sheer proletarian magic you imbue. (Please don't forget the funding we need during your next lobbying session.)

To you comrades who got yours, YOU DESERVED IT DAMMIT! And don't make a sound about it, else the Woomba Loombas come next and eat you alive!!!!

Praise Obama! Praise The Cube!

Red Rooster wrote:Great Stalin's Ghost!!! What a MASSA MESS!!! Glorious Casserole Czar and a glorious thread all around.

Comrade Pamalinski has shot her wad once again in an attempt to gain favor from our progressive spirits, but this poor poor prole needs 20 years in the Wright Church to really get it down! Feel me? I agreed Brother Obamugabe, this bastard "I" she breaths is only found in neo-kulak debauchery! We are The Party Prole Pamalinsnky, what the The Party concurs WE follow!!!

Scuse me? What exactly are you sayin'? Shot my wad? What the hell exactly IS a WAD? I have no idea what you are talking about. I, Pamalinsky, have been doin' some pretty good party prolin'. How can you insult me in this manner? Are you telling me that anything I say is...a WAD? What is that, bubble gum? Theocritus warned me about you, Red, but I never expected this. This is truly incomprehensible and insulting, and very unpleasant. If you want me to leave, I will! I don't want to be where I'm not wanted. (I'd also like to mention that you spelled my name wrong while insulting me!) You figure it out. This is uncalled for. Maybe you're just drunk. If you are, you owe me an apology. I intend to report it to the Administrator. If they don't stand behind me, then, I will be glad to be gone. And gone I will be! (I can't believe this) (And, I loved so much to post on The Cube.)

Leninka! Help! What is going on? Red Rooster is attacking me!And, it isn't funny, it's just plain mean! Red Rooster makes no sense at all! Is it just me? Maybe I don't belong here. I love to "play along" but this is just a bit weird. Too weird.

Czar Czar wrote: Have ye already forgotten the Golden Rule of Prog Fairness? "What's yours is mine, and what's mine is mine"! .

Gloriously said, Czar Czar and the premise upon which I was re-indoctrinated (was Jiffy-Lobo running eschew that day? I vaguely clearly remember "fairness. equality. fairness. equality" prolling my thought processes) Fairness is as fairness does and spreadin - redistributing the Beet Award is the name of the game which great Leader has endorsed. What you have, belongs to all; What I have belongs to all . . and to you . . and to him. . . is that not the Progressive way? And I feel sure that anyone as self-aware and full of redistributive compassion as Comrade Pinkie, would not only want the Beet Award redistributed, but demand it! What has my thinking gone astray?

Pamalinsky wrote: I'VE HAD IT WITH ALL OF YOU!
Cease and Desist! What a bunch of quibbling little progs! Disgusting!!! All you want to do is "one-up" each other with your purported "wit". The only prog who has been decent about this is...CCCP!!!! Around whom you all quibble! What a disgusting lot! And, Theo, you posted several times in a row! You must feel very threatened! I never thought I would see this from you. Especially when you have seen, and now ignore, my heartfelt posts, right on this thread! Commissarka Pinkie is right! You ALL deserve a thorough whacking! And, I mean THOROUGH! I, Pamalinsky, have been played for a SUCKER! By those I have trusted!

As a matter of fact, I'm always right, but if you don't calm down, you'll be in for a whacking, too.

[HIGHLIGHT=#ffff00]Unjustified rage?[/HIGHLIGHT] How condescending! I don't need no damn dacha goons helping me with my packing! They should beware of what I, Pamalinsky, am actually packing!
I'm fed up with all of you! And actually, Theo, you most definitely HAVE ignored my heartfelt posts. I, Pamalinsky, know you are movin' on to other "conquests". Just don't lie about it! I don't mind at all, but, I really hate it when you lie to me!

Pamalinsky, I'm going to give you one more warning.

Scuse me? What exactly are you sayin'? Shot my wad? What the hell exactly IS a WAD? I have no idea what you are talking about. I, Pamalinsky, have been doin' some pretty good party prolin'. How can you insult me in this manner? Are you telling me that anything I say is...a WAD? What is that, bubble gum? Theocritus warned me about you, Red, but I never expected this. This is truly incomprehensible and insulting, and very unpleasant. If you want me to leave, I will! I don't want to be where I'm not wanted. (I'd also like to mention that you spelled my name wrong while insulting me!) You figure it out. This is uncalled for. Maybe you're just drunk. If you are, you owe me an apology. I intend to report it to the Administrator. If they don't stand behind me, then, I will be glad to be gone. And gone I will be! (I can't believe this) (And, I loved so much to post on The Cube.)

Leninka! Help! What is going on? Red Rooster is attacking me!And, it isn't funny, it's just plain mean! Red Rooster makes no sense at all! Is it just me? Maybe I don't belong here. I love to "play along" but this is just a bit weird. Too weird.

Pamalinsky, this is your last warning . . .

Pamalinsky wrote:

Red Rooster wrote:Great Stalin's Ghost!!! What a MASSA MESS!!! Glorious Casserole Czar and a glorious thread all around.

Comrade Pamalinski has shot her wad once again in an attempt to gain favor from our progressive spirits, but this poor poor prole needs 20 years in the Wright Church to really get it down! Feel me? I agreed Brother Obamugabe, this bastard "I" she breaths is only found in neo-kulak debauchery! We are The Party Prole Pamalinsnky, what the The Party concurs WE follow!!!

Scuse me? What exactly are you sayin'? Shot my wad? What the hell exactly IS a WAD? I have no idea what you are talking about. I, Pamalinsky, have been doin' some pretty good party prolin'. How can you insult me in this manner? Are you telling me that anything I say is...a WAD? What is that, bubble gum? Theocritus warned me about you, Red, but I never expected this. This is truly incomprehensible and insulting, and very unpleasant. If you want me to leave, I will! I don't want to be where I'm not wanted. (I'd also like to mention that you spelled my name wrong while insulting me!) You figure it out. This is uncalled for. Maybe you're just drunk. If you are, you owe me an apology. I intend to report it to the Administrator. If they don't stand behind me, then, I will be glad to be gone. And gone I will be! (I can't believe this) (And, I loved so much to post on The Cube.)

Leninka! Help! What is going on? Red Rooster is attacking me!And, it isn't funny, it's just plain mean! Red Rooster makes no sense at all! Is it just me? Maybe I don't belong here. I love to "play along" but this is just a bit weird. Too weird.

Pamalinsky

The term "Wad" refers to the wad of cotton that was used to keep the black powder of a muzzle loading rifle in place before the ball was rammed down.

To "Shoot your wad" means you fire a shot without having the ball loaded: thus making a lot of noise but not causing any harm.

This term is used a lot by people who believe that the American Revolution was actually a good thing, they long back to the good old revolutionary days when people shot The Kings Men with muzzle loading rifles. Since the American Revolution is the one revolution that is anathema to all good progs, I am starting to wonder if Red Rooster may be harbouring thoughtcrimes in that little chicken skull of his...

Amandla!

Obamugabe

Who's attacking Pamalinsky and why? ummm? I think she's a sweet young prog, proudly, and with humility, adding to the collective. And now that's she's been informed on Wad Shooting, she can shoots her's Wad at anti-Progers. Maybe she needs a warm, simulated group hug and a cup of vodka.

Pamalinsky, you can practicing shooting your Wad as many times as you desire with this Practice Your Wag stick up poster!

Pam, I must tell you. This is not the time to pissing off Made Progs. Take a leaf from Pupovich. He learned to grovel and roll his eyes, and if you didn't watch him all your silverware would find a home in his luggage.

Learn this: progs don't admit to having personality. Progs are alienated, isolated people who barely feel human, and that's why we want to destroy the social fabric. So we progs have to stick together--soulless, nasty, vicious, grasping people with an innate hatred of everything which does not give us what we consider our due, which is merely what seemed doable at 7 in the morning. Or what we wanted at 7 in the morning.

"Will you have a carob bar and fair-trade coffee for breakfast?"

"Yes, and I think that I'll attack capitalism today."