The explanation is obvious. Our President O'Bama, who had just arrived from Ireland, was channeling with a corpseman from the 57th State when he wrote the date. Expecting a President to multitask the writing of the correct date while engaging in such mentally taxing activity as channeling with a corpseman would make anyone write the wrong date.
By the way, Laika, my browser is somehow failing to show updates in your "News we just don't have time to write about" column. Is someone sabotaging your communications module? --
Comrades,
The entry was not in error. Here is an un-retouched blowup of the date as entered:
The entry clearly reads as 24 May 700B. Translated, this means 24th of May in the Century (700) of Barack. As the 12th Imam, Dear Leader has re-set the years to honor both the golden century of Muhammad (the 7th) and the 8th, the new Golden Age of Obama.
ThePeoplesComrade wrote:Dear Leader is preparing us for our sliding back in time to the Glory Days of Soviet Union where men were men and women were (you get the idea).
Where men were men and women were men and the bears were scared?
Have any of you ever tried to sleep on a plane? Raise your hand if you've ever slept on a plane? Who in the back has their hand up? LIAR! WHACK!!!
Everyone knows when you have jet lag, you're so tired and confused by the different time zone, the different place, the different culture—you show me where I'm supposed to find a 24-hour Walgreens in Trondheim, Norway even though it's always daylight there in the summer—but that you can never be sure if it's today or next Tuesday, let alone 2008! Speaking of which, ever hear of the movie If It's Tuesday, This Must Be Belgium?
Which brings up something else—Obama is on a European tour, you haters, and maybe you think Obama shouldn't be on a European tour because he's black and everyone knows black folks don't do tours of Europe; moreover, he has a funny name and doesn't look like the little old ladies crammed on the tour buses, does he?
But anyone who's ever been on a tour of Europe knows how they rush you from one place to another, obsessed with keeping you on schedule; there's never time to look at anything in the Rijksmuseum or the Louvre or the Vatican but they'll lock you up screaming for six hours in a Black Forest Cuckoo Clock outlet, where the manager keeps plying you with schnapps till you don't know how it all ends or how your credit cards got maxed out and a lien placed on your firstborn until three months later, when UPS shows up at your door with 26 cuckoo clocks, three of which have that little girl bouncing on the springy swing but none come with a guy that burps plus seven Swiss chalet music boxes where you lift up the lid and a little doll swings around on a barstool in time to “Edelweiss”, which according to one little old lady I met on such a tour, is supposed to be the National Anthem of Austria. (“Isn't it ‘Edelweiss'? I thought it was ‘Edelweiss.'”.)
And speaking of National Anthems, before all of you haters start attacking Obama for what happened at the Buck House state dinner—how was he supposed to know the orchestra was playing “God Save the Queen” instead of “My Country 'Tis of Thee”? Of course he thought it was the latter! I know I did, and I know the rest of you did, too, because you all went to public school so none of you know God or the Queen from the holes in your heads, and everyone knows only the Government saves! Not to mention the fact that I believe the tune may have originally been a drinking song anyway, so why wouldn't he go bottoms up upon hearing it?
The Queen should have been a good sport, picked up her glass, and toasted with Obama, never mind her silly narcissistic song. Instead she made him look like a fool! Obviously she's out of touch, getting old and senile just like Charles and Camilla. Time to put 'em all out to pasture and replace them with William and Kate. Oh, if only William and Kate could be King and Queen while Obama is president!
And while I'm here, I don't think it's fair that the Queen and Camilla got to wear tiaras, while Michelle didn't. In fact, it's more than unfair, it's downright racist. Clearly they got to wear tiaras because they're white and fancy themselves her superior, whereas they think Michelle shouldn't be allowed to wear anything on her head but a mobcap.
Commissarka Pinkie wrote:...The Queen should have been a good sport, picked up her glass, and toasted with Obama, never mind her silly narcissistic song.
Dearest Commissarka, obviously you meant to say "...picked up her glass, and toasted Obama..." - other than that, yes, definitely. Yep.
Oh, and Comrade Grigori, I feel it incumbent upon me, depending, of course, on what the meaning of "is" is, to thank you once again for your enlightenment, this time having to do with Dear Leader's amazingly wise and generous sharing of the Ages with Muhammad and his most obvious (in hindsight) reference to said sharing!
Please excuse the Queen for being perturbed. One of her household servants had just run over her favorite CD [Barrack's speeches] with a vacuum cleaner. She also knew it could not be replaced without going through proper diplomatic channels. She would have to be without the wisdom of his words. It is almost more than a soverign can bear.
TIME STOPPED for our newly minted Irish President O'Bama when he lifted his glass to toast the QUEEN and no one else did UNTIL a minute later or so and AFTER the song GOD SAVE THE QUEEN finished playing!
What an embarassing moment for our ill-educated pointy headed Irish President!
He certainly looked the uncomfortable fool for what must have seemed an eternity!
Fool! He must be saying!
Somehow, all this is Bush's fault!
Laika the Space Dog wrote:Pinkie. Are you sure it wasn't ebony lag? I always get those two mixed up.
A good question, and one that raises a very important point about dog whistles. No, I don't mean the kind of whistle only you can hear, Laika, but a different, more insidious kind of dog whistle. I refer to the racist dog whistles used by Republicans with just about every word that spews out of their foul, sulfur-breathing mouths. “Jet lag” is a racist code word used by racist Republicans. When they say someone has “jet lag” they're really saying that person is the equivalent of a lazy black person who does nothing but “lag” about waiting for a free mortgage, free gas, and free Obama money that Obama gets from—well, I don't know, from his stash. “But Pinkie,” you say, “no one on the right is saying Obama has jet lag. In fact, they've been scoffing at the very suggestion that he has jet lag, and insisting that he's really just a dumbass who doesn't know what he's doing.” Of course. Because they know it would be racist to say “jet lag”, so they call upon one of their other, more arcane racist dog whistles: “Obama is just a dumbass who doesn't know what he's doing.” Think about it: “A dumbass who doesn't know what he's doing.” What image does that evoke? Why, “dumbass” brings to mind the lazy black dude who'd rather be stupid than get educated and better himself, for fear he'll be accused of “acting white”—but at least he knows enough to always vote Democrat. Add to that the observation that he “doesn't know what he's doing” and racist Republicans perpetuate the stereotype of an unempowered black person who's helpless and oppressed and needs the government to do everything for him—which the Republicans absolutely hate—so you see, this isn't just racism—it's hate, pure, unadulterated hate, straight up—for the dark-skinned guy who dares to occupy their White [Man's] House. You go ahead and laugh, but it's true. Some of them are even blaming the White House Protocol Office for not properly prepping him on toast etiquette. Again, they're implying through racist code that the government isn't giving the black guy the mollycoddling he needs because he's stupid and helpless—and by extension they're blowing yet another dog whistle that says, “A black man should not be POTUS.” Now I, on the other hand, can say he has jet lag and I'm not being at all racist about it. You know I mean it's because of the change in time zones, and why? Because I'm a made Prog, which means I not only care, but I care about black people.
Princess Nookie wrote:The next question in a mental status exam (after "do you know what the date is") is, "Can you tell me who is president right now?"
Psychiatrist: Can you tell me what the date today is, sir?
Obama: Of course. It's the twenty-fourth of May, two thousand and eight.
Psychiatrist: Umm-hmm... very interesting. Now we're getting somewhere. And sir, can you tell me, just who is it do you think, who is responsible for your problems?
Grigori E.R., that was the best explanation I have heard and am deeply disappointed our glorious,biased media has not picked up the reporting. Now, how about we discuss Bush and how stooopid he is?
Pinkie, thanks for pointing out the racism factor. This entire European trip is racist and so is every European of European descent. Here's more proof...
Comrades, the explanation is simple and it shows the Olympian superiority of Dear Leader while exposing the evil racist in all of us. To make excuses for Dear Leader's "mistake" is to presuppose that a) Dear Leader can make a mistake and b) that Dear Leader is so weak that he needs someone to defend him. Neither of these is true, nor could either of these ever be true.
The truth is that Michelle was proud of her nation for the first time in her adult life in 2008. Therefore, time stopped in 2008. Dear Leader won the last presidential election in US history in 2008 having received the majority of electoral votes from all 57-61 states. Therefore, time stopped in 2008. If he has the power to accomplish 100 days in a mere 72 days, certainly he can decree that it always will be 2008. ANYONE who would argue that time has progressed since 2008 is claiming, and Princess Nookie is qualified to verify this, that they are more progressive than Dear Leader himself! If that's not narcissism, then I don't know the meaning of the word. To even let the thought speculate upon the possibility of crossing your mind, if I may coin a phrase, is to be confronted with your own twisted, hate filled, racist desires to find fault with Dear Leader and force elderly, handicapped, minority kittens to starve on a diet of dog food.
Admitting that it is and always will be 2008 is admitting Dear Leader's supernatural abilities to heal the earth. If it's always 2008, then the Gore Apocalypse will never happen in ten years. So you see how Dear Leader has rescued not only us, his ungrateful and fault finding minions, but the earth and the universe as well.
But it is good that we see our hideous, unreeducated selves for what we really are. We must repent, comrades, and never again question that it is any year other than 2008.
Hmmm...?
So Juche 97 is really 2008 and Juche 100 is really 2008? This is why the Colonel really needs to get to this thread. Those in the Party™ who use Juche really aren't in Juche 100 but are still stuck in Juche 97?
So...look at Juche 100 and the beauty of Juche!
Now are we to go back to Juche 97?
Who are we to judge Juche time? These Temporal Time shifts are hard on the old Sputnik.Did I mention I need a new Sputnik? Can the Party™ at least approve some allocations to Pimp My Sputnik™
Their dear leader needs to get on board with our Dear Leader lest they think themselves more socialist than thou. Surely somebody in the North Korean workers' paradise and vacation resort has a 2008 calendar! And is that a picture of your new pimped out Sputnik?
*Sigh* Must I explain EVERY bit of weirdness involving time? We all know that when you travel really fast, you experience time dilation. Because of the power of Chairman O's brain, coupled with the speed of Air Force 1, he traveled back to 2008. A simple computer error prevented a realigning of the timelines. The operator of the computer has been shot. Pay no attention to things you are not authorized to see.
Colonel 7.62 wrote:*Sigh* Must I explain EVERY bit of weirdness involving time? We all know that when you travel really fast, you experience time dilation. Because of the power of Chairman O's brain, coupled with the speed of Air Force 1, he traveled back to 2008. A simple computer error prevented a realigning of the timelines. The operator of the computer has been shot. Pay no attention to things you are not authorized to see.
Well, obviously, someone in charge of making sure everything went smoothly for the president failed.
You are simply seeing a bit of something that never happened. Pay no attention and MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIVES! Those who continue seeing this will also receive a bullet to the brain with no money up front.
Pinkie darling. I see you brought my favorite shovel. And here, I brought all your favorites too. Vodka filled chocolates. Chocolate flavored vodka, fine caviar, and look *runs and hides in wormhole* Hey! I'll be in 1918 if anyone needs me!
The uncontested absurdities of today are the accepted slogans of tomorrow. They come to be accepted by degrees, by precedent, by implication, by erosion, by default, by dint of constant pressure on one side and constant retreat on the other - until the day when they are suddenly declared to be the country's official ideology. ~ Ayn Rand
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