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The end of Global Warming causes depression among scientists

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[img]/images/various_uploads/End_of_Global_Warming.jpg[/img]

Comrades,

Today should be a day for great celebration. It is the 20th anniversary of my groundbreaking Important Scientific Paper, The Hokey Schtick Hockey Stick.

When it was discredited by [spit, spit] Real Scientists, our people managed to keep that out of the Press, and the Proles kept on believing the immense fraud that I perpetrated.

But now, that Fascist, not-my-President Drumpf, has succeeded in getting a notorious Denier appointed as the head of NASA! On the anniversary of my fraud paper!

In past years, NASA has been very helpful to our cause, tampering with temperature records going back hundreds of years, to make the Global Warminsk hoax look real. But with this man in charge, I fear that all is now lost.

Here's a link to our propaganda arm known as "News"week that I think will explain it all:

WHO IS JIM BRIDENSTINE? CONTROVERSIAL NEW NASA LEADER IS REPUBLICAN CONGRESSMAN AND CLIMATE CHANGE SKEPTIC

Climate change denier Jim Bridenstine has been confirmed as NASA's 13th administrator, becoming the first member of Congress to hold the post.

The Senate narrowly confirmed the Republican Congressman for Oklahoma in a 50-49 vote on Thursday, amid concerns that he does not have the scientific knowledge to head the space agency. The vote came after President Donald Trump touted Bridenstine for the role last year.

Read it and weep, Comrades. The end of the Glorious World of Next Tuesday is nigh.

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Perhaps a consensus of 97% just wasn't enough. Or perhaps the other 3% should've been dealt with more, um, assertively.

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Imperatorskiy Pingvin wrote:Perhaps a consensus of 97% just wasn't enough. Or perhaps the other 3% should've been dealt with more, um, assertively.
Товарищ Пингвин!

Now that wealth is being unequally redistributed and more Republicans are using homeless people to test the shocks on their Lincoln Navigators, you will soon be without a habitat. In just ten, oh, what the heck, DAYS, the Antarctic will melt and sink into the Weddell Sea to join the wreckage of Endurance.

I mention this for two reasons. One is that we need the picture of you floating on a lone iceberg to prove our good comrade's theory was more than right. Secondly, I believe enough comrades should be able to pitch in and get you a tractor barn with an air conditioned office where you can live after all the ice is gone.

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My first thought was that you were writing about this news story.

Climate change is ‘not as bad as we thought' say scientists

But now I realize the situation is a lot worse than I thought.

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Thank of the Polar Bears Comrades! THINK!! What's that? Polar Bears are fine? Numbers are increasing? F*ck.

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Papa Kalashnikook wrote:Thank of the Polar Bears Comrades! THINK!! What's that? Polar Bears are fine? Numbers are increasing? F*ck.
Comrade Professor, educate thyself! True science is an assertion followed by an animation. We all know the assertion, or we wouldn't be Party members. Here's the animation. What further need have we of witnesses?

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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
Papa Kalashnikook wrote:Thank of the Polar Bears Comrades! THINK!! What's that? Polar Bears are fine? Numbers are increasing? F*ck.
Comrade Professor, educate thyself! True science is an assertion followed by an animation. We all know the assertion, or we wouldn't be Party members. Here's the animation. What further need have we of witnesses?

Drat!

PB.jpg

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Captain Craptek wrote:
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
Papa Kalashnikook wrote:Thank of the Polar Bears Comrades! THINK!! What's that? Polar Bears are fine? Numbers are increasing? F*ck.
Comrade Professor, educate thyself! True science is an assertion followed by an animation. We all know the assertion, or we wouldn't be Party members. Here's the animation. What further need have we of witnesses?

Drat!

PB.jpg
I mean, it was the Current Truth.

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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:[W]e need the picture of you floating on a lone iceberg to prove our good comrade's theory was more than right. Secondly, I believe enough comrades should be able to pitch in and get you a tractor barn with an air conditioned office where you can live after all the ice is gone.

Ask, comrade, and ye shall receive (according to your need, of course):

Penguin Ice Floe.jpg


P.S.: The walk-in freezer where the beet vodka is stored behind Tractor Barn No. 2 will suffice for my new office.

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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
Papa Kalashnikook wrote:Thank of the Polar Bears Comrades! THINK!! What's that? Polar Bears are fine? Numbers are increasing? F*ck.
Comrade Professor, educate thyself! True science is an assertion followed by an animation. We all know the assertion, or we wouldn't be Party members. Here's the animation. What further need have we of witnesses?
Drat! x3. However, for those of us who don't tolerate fools gladly remain open minded about such things, it is clear merely from the photo that this is another alarmist fake news hit piece sensitive piece of social justice video by concerned jackass simians scientists.


 
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