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The New Pledge

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"WANT IS WEALTH
POVERTY IS PROSPERITY
SQUALOR IS LUXURY"


I pledge allegiance to Dear Leader
Barrack Hussein 0bama
And to the tyranny which he imposes
One boot upon my neck, my every move recorded
With oppression and poverty for all
(Except the elite tyrant class and their cronies)

That's way too short to be an Obama pledge. I demand that you rewrite it so it occupies at least 6 pages. The 6 page pledge will be required for children to memorize and repeat every morning in their indoctrination lessons *cough* I mean school.

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Science Czar wrote:That's way too short to be an Obama pledge. I demand that you rewrite it so it occupies at least 6 pages. The 6 page pledge will be required for children to memorize and repeat every morning in their indoctrination lessons *cough* I mean school.
You ask too much of our children, Comrade Czar. The entire Common Core curriculum for grades K through 12 is not 6 pages long. The pledge below is okay, but it can be shortened to just "Barack Hussein Obama mmm mmm mmm" which can be recited before meals bought with the food stamps provided by our benevolent Dear Leader.


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Don't forget the importance of having effective means for knowing which parents are not devoutly and accurately teaching the pledge to the mini-people they delude themselves into believing are "their" children:

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--KOOK


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Comrade Che'

You should pass this information along at the next general meeting. Much of the original pledge - particularly the "salute" - could came in handy as Dear Leader gathers his collective powers over the next few years.

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Agree Most Captain of Craptek! The extended hand salute should be re-instituted immediately. This will be on the agenda of the next General People's Assembly meeting!

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Science Czar wrote:That's way too short to be an Obama pledge...

SC, you must not confuse a bill with a pledge. Every bill or act must be at least 2000 pages single-spaced, to allow wiggle room and modification by Congress (even though they are unnecessary, they are entertaining), the vast Heroic Bureaucratic class, and Dear 0'Leader. Oh, and don't forget it may be announced no more than two days prior to enactment as law.

However, for understanding by the LoInfoVos - specifically to allow for unstumbling chanting, Chairman Meow refreshed us with a very important point: "Barack" (or Barrack, you say Quran, I say Koran) "Hussein 0bama... Mmm - mmm - mmm!" is about the longest string of words and sounds we can expect our proles to master. Therefore, I must ALMOST denounce myself for cogitating (oh unpleasant activity) a pledge that is actually too verbose for our Glorious World of This Tuesday.

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[/quote]You ask too much of our children, Comrade Czar. The entire Common Core curriculum for grades K through 12 is not 6 pages long. The pledge below is okay, but it can be shortened to just "Barack Hussein Obama mmm mmm mmm" which can be recited before meals bought with the food stamps provided by our benevolent Dear Leader.

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I see what you did there, Chairman Meow. Very clever.

I hope your shilling for 3M brings you great wealth and profit. What kid couldn't use a roll of Scotch Tape or Post-Its to bind hostages and write ransom notes as well as make "gunny" looking things.

Ah! Kids today, whatttaya gonna do?

M&Ms might be a good way to go as well. In spite of Michelle's foodie thingie, I'm sure you could get a bribesubsidy for that. The intimidation factor is strong. That's what counts. Good luck!


 
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