Dear Fellow Travelers,

While neither Comrade Tovarichi nor I myself have yet been formally accused of any crime (at least by any non-criminal, honorable, and reputable accusers), may I remind you all as I stated so clearly on the previous (and I might add PERFECTLY GOOD!) thread -

"It wasn't me."

As for Tovarich Tovarichi, while I can't give you the full details due to the national (and global) security nature forthwith and thereby, you may rest assured - especially after you've imbibed sufficient quantities of beet vodka - that our dear comrade Tovarichi was, in fact, engaged in matters of Double Plus Good Ultrablack™ Beyond Top Secret espionage, which necessitated his seemingly committing the alleged crimes.

You gotta ask yourselves, given the depth of his clearance and good looks, not to mention his potential and delightful psychedelic brain-out-of-jar stage projection, if you continue to prosecute this Hero of the People - do you feel lucky?

Well - do ya, punks? (this statement not to include Comrade Prosecutor and former Judge/Madam Fraulein Pulloskies; not available in stores; your mileage may vary; pull my finger).

I would unhesitatingly seek to assist Brain-in-a-Jar's efforts to defend these two miscrean (as well as a number of other miscreants) if my hands weren't tied.

--KOOK

Commodore Snoogie Woogums wrote:

The attachment tea party.jpg is no longer available

COMRADES!

What started out as an innocent request for some welding to be performed by our resident handy prole Tovarichi, has turned out to have revealed nefarious anti-party activity and treachery against the State by him and his erstwhile partner R.O.C.K in the USSA .....including allowing Atomic wedgies to be performed without a proper license!!!!!!!!

For those Comrades not up to speed, the entire sordid background of how this all came about can be found here at the below link..........

https://thepeoplescube.com/peoples-blog ... 12106.html

I have been humbly tasked as Judge of the forgone guilty verdict proceedings and our lovely, oh so easy on the eyes Fraulein Frankenfeinstein has been tasked as Prosecutor. Resident Cube towering intellect Ivan Betinov, has been assigned with the thankless task of defending these miscreants.

As of now, the 'Dastardly Duo' have not been formally charged as the evidence is still being collected and witnesses interviews are still being conducted, but have been ordered not to leave the area and be available to stand trial at a moments notice. The court now asks all Comrades if you have further information or wish to just add your contributions about the court proceedings on the nefarious activities involving these two, to post them here from now on.

Respectfully Yours,

Honorable Judge Snoogie Woogums Esq
3rd District Court... Kangaroo Prefecture
1233 Hang-em High Street

Your Honor Snoogie,

I am submitting the following image as proof positive that my personal photo (taken the day I took Comrade Putout for a ride in my biplane) has been duplicated without permission and sold for profit <gasp> to a capitalist Website! I realize that just because the "Dastardly Duo" was present on the day of my flight, and that financing was required for their extravagant party, one cannot conclude their guilt - but it doesn't look that good either.

To be fair, I am submitting the same evidence to the defense. Though Ivan mentioned the word "bribe," I wouldn't want anyone to think that was my motive. Justice is at stake here, and justice is my only concern.

Yours truly,

Captain Craptek (aviator)

I DENOUNCE COMRADE OF FALLEN IN GRACES! He is not allowed to steal dear leaders line of "it wasn't me". Deniable is flimsy at best and lying at worst . . and someone, that appears to be stepping on dear leaders toes, does it not?!!

I have submitted and Approved undeniable proof positive of guilty comrades. There can be no further discuss of discuss, I am thinking.

Comrades are now involving themselves in CAPITALISM by offering products for sale in stores!? aaaakk! I am fearful all this stress is giving me the vapors..........

Dammit, see what you idiots have done? The last time the Fraulein had "the vapors," it took a week to air this joint out!

While neither Comrade Tovarichi nor I myself have yet been formally accused of any crime (at least by any non-criminal, honorable, and reputable accusers),

Your Honor, My client makes a valid point. There have been no formal charges levelled against either of these wastes of skin. I demand immediate lodging of formal charges, followed by a motion to dismiss them all as immaterial, prejudicial, and insulting to housepets.

Ivan Betinov wrote:

While neither Comrade Tovarichi nor I myself have yet been formally accused of any crime (at least by any non-criminal, honorable, and reputable accusers),

Your Honor, My client makes a valid point. There have been no formal charges levelled against either of these wastes of skin. I demand immediate lodging of formal charges, followed by a motion to dismiss them all as immaterial, prejudicial, and insulting to housepets.

Comrade Ivan,

I've been told you accused me of being a "bribe happy" squirrel in your "secret meeting" next door? Is this true? Well, sir - in that case I would add the following image to the mounting evidence against your clients! How do you explain this!

Ya know, Dear Snoogie, I've posted this before, way back down the wormhole, but it seems appropriate to post it again. I do this as an advisory tactic, in order to help you make the right decision involving our dear proles, Tovi and R.O.C.K.

They deserve the best lawyerly actions available to all Progs, it's only Fair™.

Non Sequitur anal-yze, ANAL-YZE!

Comrades, forget the silly show trial - come on up (or receive the transmissions) from the R.O.C.K. Opera, "Anarchy for the USSA" and support Laika the Space Dog, Hero of the People!

Let's face it - support for Laika isn't what it once was, and as you can see by the photo above, her stock of good beet vodka from the motherland is gone, forcing her to drink inferior vodka like Stolichnaya!

Comrades, we owe it to Laika!!

Your Honor, Please! I object to further damning evidence being entered into evidence before we have even heard formal charges! And Craptek, check under your nuts. I left a little something from you-know-whos for you there.

Comrades, I submit for evidence my personal ticket to a very exclusive Inner-Party award banquet and people's competition, the Ted Kennedy Invitational which celebrates Liberal Lion contributions to Feminisim™!

Is it possible that this is but a terrible misunderstanding?

Commodore Snoogie Woogums wrote:

---------------------------------------

When I saw the picture in the middle- the chick in the bikini and the blue Miller wire welder, the first thing I thought of was-



I spent a career as a professional welder, and I gotta tell you THIS CHICK doesn't excite me very much.

Good motif though.

.
.
Now it appears that a life-sized marzipan sculpture of Lady Gaga was also procured!

Comrades please help me with the symbolism...

A SINGLE blue ball and Tovarichi is trapped in the SINGLE blue ball!?

What kind of a shindig was this?!

Perhaps a Bill Clinton type of medical exam is in order for Comrade Tovarichi? (We would require photographic proof... or it didn't happen!)
.
.

Justice for Craptek! Murder Tovarichi! We are all Defenders of Nuts!
(can a little capitalism be tolerated, if we use it to fight capitalism? You know, sell hoodies to support who we all know is the victim?) I know that Tovarichi is guilty! I heard an audio clip on MSNBC that told me!

ORDER in THIS COURT!!!!!!

Standby for an IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT.....

The following formal charges have now been filed against Comrades Tovarichi and R.O.C.K in the USSA

* Using state funds to ARC-WELD a sympathetic TEA-PARTY motif on a Rock -n- Roll Tour bus.

* Failure to submit the proper form 1237-89034-7-L (in triplicate) granting permission to divert diesel fuel from Beet production tractor for use in tour bus.

* Utilizing Part-Time labor to weld said motif on bus and not providing proper safety gear to said employee (be advised this charge may be overlooked due to recent GOVT shutdown to not have the funds to provide proper welding outfit and wages in place at the time of labor usage provided the Defense counsel can show a plausible connection.....She's hot)

* Staging an entertainment event involving Vanilla pudding and Mud wrestling without a proper permit filed in quadruplicate specifically Form 1433-70977-28 Vanilla Pudding / Mud Wrestling with the Permitted use of Atomic Wedgies During the Match

* Cavorting and mingling with known TEA-PARTY groupies and partying like it was 1999.

* The Kitchen Sink.....Just to thrown that in there.

During this trial this court expects to be able to thoroughly examine all defense evidence presented to the court for its appraisal 'value'.

Now that charges have been filed the previous motion that was previously filed by the defense.....

To dismiss them all as immaterial, prejudicial and insulting to housepets.

The motion was read to a non-biased local house pet party doggie who found it not to be insulting but nothing more than the defense barking up the wrong tree, so your answer to the motion to dismiss starts with a D as in DENIED.

Now Comrade Betinov / Comrade Frau (sorry about your vapors) if you have no further need to prep your clients or prepare to prosecute this miscreants

THEN LET THIS SHOW TRIAL of the 'Dastardly Duo' Now Commence!

R.O.C.K in the USSA!

That note from your Mommy was not notarized and therefore cannot be used as an excuse to not attend your own trial!!!!! Your defense Attorney must be pulling his hair out by now, well if he had any. It has not escaped the courts attention that he has been desperately trying to give you and your cohort Tovarichi advice that your not heeding!

Also, in the interest of fairness there is actually a 00000000.9% chance that you and Tovarichi may actually be found innocent. With great odds like that, put on your finest spandex and let us start with the proceedings.

Pshaw - a note from Mom IS A NOTE FROM MOM!! It trumps all else, notarized or not.

Comrades, I have found a brief but short slot of time between changing all my strings and tuning my guitars - if this miniscule and yet hugely important allotment of time is sufficient for a show trial, count me in! I think I can spare it.

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Comrades, I have found a brief but short slot of time between [highlight=#FFFF00]changing all my strings [/highlight]and tuning my guitars - if this miniscule and yet hugely important allotment of time is sufficient for a show trial, count me in! I think I can spare it.

Comrade ROCK,

Would that include the "G" string used in the atomic wedgie incident? Could this be seen as an attempt to suppress or tamper with evidence?

Your Honor Snoogie,

I believe we have another charge pending.

GOOD!

Now that R.O.C.K has decided not to 'fret' it anymore....we will proceed.

Captain Craptek,

Your enthusiasm is laudable for additional charges to be had but we've already thrown in everything including the kitchen sink in the charges.

The prosecution needs to make no opening statements, as she is still recovering from the vapors.......

Defense Counsel Ivan Betinov,

You may begin at anytime with your opening statements and offers of defense evidence for the courts perusal.

Enough of these continuances! On with the Show (Trial)!!

*whistles "Anarchy for the USSA"*
*rolls eyes*

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:

NoteFromMom.jpg

umm, no, said note was not notarized... but I am impressed at the unusual steps taken to forge and lie about said document. I see a DEAR LEADER IN THE MAKING... and I am wondering if I should be concerned? But in any case, I like the odd and strange initiative to cover yourrear end... hidden parts.

I am thinking enough of the trial... comrade is obviously guilt as charge but has the making OF A GLORIOUS CLINTONESQUE/ OBAMAESQUE COMRADE. Besides, I am busy prepping the Peoples Vodka.

Thank you, Your Honor, and may I say what a lovely shade of blue your eyes are today.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Collective, you see before you two men. Two men who have transgressed, yet two men who none-the-less have value to the community. The court indeed has been merciful in the leveling of the charges specified against my clients; why for example, they very well could have been charged with Racism for choosing vanilla pudding for their antics rather than a more cosmopolitain chocolate or tutti-frutti. But I digress.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Your Honor, Learned Counsel for the Prosecution, I'll be brief. The question here is not "Did R.O.C.K. in the USSA and Prole Tovarichi throw a wild and unauthorized party with Party resources." Nor is it a question of if they took a few liberties with their female guests.

They did.

But, Your Honor, these female guests were all members of the local TEA Party apparat, and as we have been told endlessly by both the sacred media and the secular entertainment industry, these Republican women are seething pits of unrequitted passions, with the bodies of houris and the minds of Port Said sewer rats.

You can see this for yourself, Your Honor: I have arranged for these witnesses to be available for private interview in your chambers. If I may be so bold, perhaps a moton to adjourn for the day is in order at this point, that you may have ample time to evaluate their demeanor and assets?

*Wow...Betinov is pulling out all the stops on this one!*

I move that we adjourn for the day!!

I also have another sip of Cazadores Anejo!

Ivan Betinov wrote:Thank you, Your Honor, and may I say what a lovely shade of blue your eyes are today.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Collective, you see before you two men. Two men who have transgressed, yet two men who none-the-less have value to the community. The court indeed has been merciful in the leveling of the charges specified against my clients; why for example, they very well could have been charged with Racism for choosing vanilla pudding for their antics rather than a more cosmopolitain chocolate or tutti-frutti. But I digress.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Your Honor, Learned Counsel for the Prosecution, I'll be brief. The question here is not "Did R.O.C.K. in the USSA and Prole Tovarichi throw a wild and unauthorized party with Party resources." Nor is it a question of if they took a few liberties with their female guests.

They did.

But, Your Honor, these female guests were all members of the local TEA Party apparat, and as we have been told endlessly by both the sacred media and the secular entertainment industry, these Republican women are seething pits of unrequitted passions, with the bodies of houris and the minds of [highlight=#ffff00]Port Said sewer rats[/highlight].

You can see this for yourself, Your Honor: I have arranged for these witnesses to be available for private interview in your chambers. If I may be so bold, perhaps a moton to adjourn for the day is in order at this point, that you may have ample time to evaluate their demeanor and assets?

Comrade Betinov,

Congrats on your novel defense of the accused. Oh, and another thing; I'll be adding "Port Said sewer rats" to your "bribe happy squirrel" comment in the "future evidence" section of my Comrades Diary, just in case the need should ever arise - if you know what I mean. BTW: I checked and there's nothing under my nuts.

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:

The attachment LaikaStoli.jpg is no longer available

Comrades, forget the silly show trial - come on up (or receive the transmissions) from the R.O.C.K. Opera, "Anarchy for the USSA" and support Laika the Space Dog, Hero of the People!

Let's face it - support for Laika isn't what it once was, and as you can see by the photo above, her stock of good beet vodka from the motherland is gone, forcing her to drink inferior vodka like Stolichnaya!

Comrades, we owe it to Laika!!

I wouldn't be too hasty about Laika's waning support there, dear R.O.C.K.


Just yesterday, while applying for my Vodka rations, I was suddenly interrupted by a guy, a tall lumberjack sort, who was struggling to lift a quadruple six-pack case of a brand of beer I had never heard of: K9. He had a Brit accent and referred to this beer as "absolutely, superb." He came to the store to buy this brand because he was afraid it would "sell out" and wanted to buy as much of it as he could.

He pulled out a bottle from his case and offered me a look at the label, which was endorsed by Hunter S. Thompson, in addition to the name of the manufacturer which was, and I quote: "Flying Dog"

Yes, it would seem that Laika has joined the dark side and has gone with the evil capitalist, profit-driven beer soaked Right! After all, the Right does love their beer, especially the knuckle-dragging, football-loving, canoe-rowing (the Redneck Yacht Club's all over Flyover Country, actually, bars by this name on any given river) gun-loving, wacko-job neanderthals.

I couldn't find the actual label I read but here's what I did find:

Need I say more?

Counselor Betinov;
First and foremost, I saw the title of this thread, and I'm not happy. I don't care to be called a "Dastard, " by boat-people, especially in front of The Children.™ I do have a male parental figure, known to me, who is in one of three possible Gulags...

Second. If a note from Mom is inadmissable, the whole pudding issue should be dismissed. Who signed the note? ROCK's Mom. Who says "don't play in your food?" EVERYBODY's Mom. The court can't have their pudding and eat it too (and I believe the Commodore's dress white uniform still has vanilla pudding on it (ala a blue dress owned by a Miss Lewinski...) and we have video of the front row... a trump card you can throw as needed.

Keep up the adequate work!


FREE R.O.C.K.!!! Justice for Trayvon Tovarichi !

Ahhhh, Comrade Tovarichi! Good to see you!

It appears that our Soviet judicial system has adjourned for the night, but hey - since we're here anyway - whaddaya say to an all night party in the court house?? The Tea Party girls are waiting for us in the judge's chambers... and they seemed quite anxious, hoping for your soon arrival last time I spoke to them...

Shall we?

Bring Vodka, and those little meatballs in barbecue sauce.

I'll bring pudding...

Is the People's clinic still open? I seem to have acqured a small ummm call it a "condition" from that welding student. It seems she's sharing more than enthusiasm.

Ah, THERE you are!

Comrade, just pour some of the People's Beet Vodka on, well, you know, and you and all of our new friends will be just fine. Such is the glory of good beet vodka; but you knew that.

What a waste of vodka! Is there any way to salvage... nevermind. The sacrifices I make for the Party and the parties... I hope it works



By the way, the Junior Varsity team wants to try butterscotch, I'm ok with that, you?

Sure, variety is the spice of life Comrade! I wonder what the judge is gonna think in the morning when he walks into his chambers and sees all the leftover pudding and all the empty bottles?

As always, we blame the squirrel.

And maybe Krasnodar. He hasn't been a whole lot of help, and the still in the tractor barn is cold and empty, so I know what he has NOT been keeping up with.

Oh, be sure to thank your Mom for the note!

Tovarichi wrote:As always, we blame the squirrel.

Your Honor, The Inner Circle will not be swayed. We have worked to long to korrekt these Amerikan proles... through humor, psychosis, and bribery.... we have won. We will not have these two -- if they can not see the grand recourse of our accomplishments. Fire at will...

..Or we will.

Collectively Your Gang of Four Comrade,

Red Rooster

The Court wishes to acknowledge the Esteemed presence of Comrade Red Rooster to the proceedings!!!! It is good to see you occupying your permanently reserved front row seat in this trial. I have to acknowledge that after interviewing the TEA Party groupies in my private chambers that they did make a pretty compelling case for some mercy on these miscreants.......

KOOK rises to Praise ROCK in the U.S.S.A. and to Denounce him.

First, the Praise: ROCK earned the status of Hero of the People when he overachieved in one of the Progressive Movement's most important tasks: Finding virtually unknown aspects of the desperately-still-trying-to-cling-to-Capitalism U.S.A. suitable for universal condemnation. He accomplished this daunting task not-only by discovering the inherently racist origin of the name of the now-former state of Oklahoma (land of RED people) but also by single-handedly re-naming it "Above Texas,"



which also accomplished two additional things simultaneously. First, it relieved the now-former "Oklahoma" of the stigma of such racist name; Second, it suitably recognized the Indigeneous-Descendant Peoples of "Above Texas" as being "Above Texans" in the same way in which the politically-revered MDOPCIOTPPCBNAAPO Culture are intrinsically "Above American'DOPES.'"

Now, the Denunciation: Afther these wonderfully Progressive accomplishments, ROCK failed to also remedy the racist boundary-line method the American DOPES utilized in subjecting the now-Above-Texans to a topographical form of racist humiliation: The American DOPES shaped the border of "Above Texas" to symbolize a stone hachet and to thereby racistly imply that anyone living in "Above Texas" is a descendant of a stone-age culture.

--KOOK

DIVERSIONARY Tactic at best! (Comrade, remember the lands between Above Texas and my beloved Texasistan are separated by what? The RED river? colors of indigenous people of color, squares of equality, and good communism...)

Comrade Kook,

The court wishes to recognize what a fine 'hatchet job' that you've accomplished in your denouncement. The court has been receiving much paperwork as of late from defense counsel that has been provided to him by the defendants that needs to be reviewed by the court for authenticity to ensure it is genuine and not tampered with.

In reward for your fine denouncement the court is now to happy assign you a portion of the paperwork received for you to also review for its quality. Just a reminder, that the Dead Presidents pictures on all the green paperwork your receiving should have a visible watermark if you hold them up to a light......

On with the trial!!!

Prosecutor Frau (my your looking as lovely as ever),

The defense team has reminded me that they forgot to allow you to examine one more piece of evidence and wishes to apologize for the lateness of this evidence offering for your perusal. The Court has already scolded defense counsel for the lapse.

What revelations will Day #2 of the Show Trial of the Century bring?

Your Honor, my apologies for being a few moments late for this session. When I arrived at the courthouse this morning I found that someone had scratched out the "L" in the "Public Defender" sign on my office door, that the lock had been forced, and that the two top drawers of my desk had been filled with Jell-o Pudding and little meatballs in barbecue sauce, respectively. I have thus been cleaning out my drawers all morning.

I have my briefs in order, now, however, and am ready to proceed with my defense.

First, I would like to thank Your Honor for dismissing the charges involving the TEA Party groupies.

Second, I would like to thank the Learned Counsel for the Prosecution for admitting that the Letter from Defendant R.O.C.K. in the USSA, while undoubtedly forged, is in accordance with the highest principles of the Party for the fabrication of excuses and shifting the blame to others.

Third, and this is crucial, I would like to point out that Prole Tovarichi is now wearing a gray hoodie and eating Skittles. What is more, he has indicated that he is willing to share his Skittles with the members of the jury; if each of them will feel around under their seats, they will find a package taped to the bottom (Learned that little trick from Oprah). On a side note, I observe, completely innocently, that the new, forgery-proof $100 bills fit inside a large Skittles package without folding or wrinkling, and that a sizeable stack of them can be slid neatly inside through a small and easily concealed slit.

Yaaaaaaawn.

Comrades, has anyone seen the coffee? We may have filled the pot with beet vodka last night and I can't seem to find it.

Comrade KOOK, I and the fine people of ABOVETEXAS thank you for pointing out their glorious rescue from a non-Party-Approved name which had plagued them for lo, these many years. While I may have humbly played a small part, I must also acknowledge the participation, at least in the form of encouragement, from Tovarich Tovarichi and his gang of merry Tea Party Progressive Girls!

In addition, I'd like to thank my co-defendant for the package of skittles - the 7-11 didn't even know what hit them last night! Yo.

Finally, Comrade Brain in Jar, you look quite distinguished wearing those briefs pulled over your, well, you!

OUT OF ORDER!!!!!

The candy machine by the mens room is out of order again! Somebody call the vending machine company this Commodore needs his snickers bar.......Oh, looky here, somebody left me some skittles.

Now were where we? Oh, yes, yes, yes....examining the defense evidence. The court has noticed that the demeanor of the Jury has noticeably changed and the nooses, boos and hissing when the defendants had arrived on previous occasions are now conspicuously absent. It is apparent to this court that the jury has almost made up its mind on this case after reaching underneath their seats this morning.

The court has to acknowledge that the defense has shown the defendants to be adept at being professional victims, taking no responsibility for their actions at all and playing the race card to the hilt...In short, showing themselves almost to be perfect Progs, the only thing that is lacking is a confession from these two... that ends up blaming everything on Bush.

The Court will remind the defense that they have already admitted their clients are guilty in their opening statements, so the confessions will be the determining factor in what type of sentencing is to be imposed......Light or Heavy.

The Court will now take a recess to allow the defense to work on its confessions, so that we may wrap this up and this court can render its judgement.

Captain Craptek,

The Court has not forgotten that you have been put on retainer as a professional nut evaluator for the court. Unfortunately the defense did not pursue an insanity defense so your services were not required on the stand. However the defense did file some green Dead Presidents paperwork for evidence appraisal, that in light of your standing by if needed the court now wishes you to peruse. You will find the paperwork buried in the yard behind the courthouse along with where you usually bury the rest of your winter acorn stash.

Tavarichi,

Your co-defendant has lavished praise on your collaborative contributions. But I have an assignment for you.

Apply your hi-tech expertise to find out how and why I keep hearing audio from commercials touting boots associated with sounds like those made by Chairman Meo and touting dental-hygiene products for dogs. It makes me wonder whether someone is piping the sounds (in an endless loop) only into the Ghulag in which I'm still serving a sentence imposed long ago or such sounds are also being heard by other members of the Cube.

Is it a manifestation of backsliding capitalistic money-grubbing by TPC or is it a manifestation of data-mining hacking?

Has the TPC fallen into the control of those no-bid contractors who built the ObamaCare site? Is there no end to the dangers of our reliance upon private contractors instead of Navigators and Federal Bureaucrats exclusively?

Are we being punished? I'd ask whether I'm going insane, but everyone knows I'm already there. Ooops, Gotta go -- here comes Nurse Rachet.

--KOOK

PS -- Commodore, send me whatever you need for me to read/study, but please also send me some replacements for that 15-watt curleycue, mercury-filled GE bulb which provides my only light for reading.

Commodore Snoogie Woogums wrote:...Oh, looky here, somebody left me some skittles.

Comrade Commodore, I would be very careful not to eat any skittles from a package that has already been opened; you don't know where they may have been. Just sayin'.

Has anyone seen the Secretary for the Defense? Yo - Brain -

What a night! Did I have an appointment today?
Anything important? Anything?

Tovarichi wrote:What a night! Did I have an appointment today?
Anything important? Anything?

Nothing much Tov..seems to be a lull in the proceedings..BTW..work on your confession..I suspect your guilt has been pre-determined yet to be decided..just a hint..throw yourself on the mercy of this kangaroo court!

Che' Ramie wrote:

Tovarichi wrote:What a night! Did I have an appointment today?
Anything important? Anything?

Nothing much Tov..seems to be a lull in the proceedings..BTW..work on your confession..I suspect your guilt has been pre-determined yet to be decided..just a hint..throw yourself on the mercy of this kangaroo court!

Comrade Che, thanks, sound advice. We met these ladies in the judges chambers at the party last night, appropriately enough, their names (they say) are Faith, Hope, Charity, and Mercy. I'll take Mercy, ROCK could use Charity and we'll sort out the others...

Tovarichi wrote:

Che' Ramie wrote:

Tovarichi wrote:What a night! Did I have an appointment today?
Anything important? Anything?

Nothing much Tov..seems to be a lull in the proceedings..BTW..work on your confession..I suspect your guilt has been pre-determined yet to be decided..just a hint..throw yourself on the mercy of this kangaroo court!

Comrade Che, thanks, sound advice. We met these ladies in the judges chambers at the party last night, appropriately enough, their names (they say) are Faith, Hope, Charity, and Mercy. I'll take Mercy, ROCK could use Charity and we'll sort out the others...

Oh, Tovi! I am so impressed by your willingness to compromise! Awesome! What a guy!

Che' Ramie wrote:

Errr..there appears to be something wrong with the dead president document I found in my complimentary baggie of Skittles under my juror seat...

Che' Ramie wrote:

Errr..there appears to be something wrong with the dead president document I found in my complimentary baggie of Skittles under my juror seat...

SKITTLES.jpg

Comrade Che, for Lenin's sake, I do believe we could move you to the HEAD of the bread line and you'd still ask for toast...

Were you expecting skittles? Did you get skittles? Were you expecting a little something to pad your wallet and grease your way through the Government? Did you find something? Do you have a problem with this?


Use what you've been given, Go past the People's clinic and get some cough syrup, stop by the concession stand and get some beverage (KEEP THE CHANGE!); Use the skittles and make up some fire-assed lean (aka purple drank) and sit in the back of the courtroom, watch the little judge waddle around in his robes and pontificate about what a slug I and my esteemed co-defendant am/are (he could take lessons from my wife, he's not very good at this)


Dammit man, once you're bought, STAY bought.


And WHERE is Krasnodar? At the rate we've been partying when we run out of the good stuff we're going to have to start re-filling bottles with the stuff we brewed in the tractor barn and that takes INVENTORY! I showed his picture to the girls, and they agreed that Krasno might not need CHANGE, but HOPE giggled and said she could do him a world of good...

Tovarichi wrote:

Che' Ramie wrote:

Errr..there appears to be something wrong with the dead president document I found in my complimentary baggie of Skittles under my juror seat...

SKITTLES.jpg

Comrade Che, for Lenin's sake, I do believe we could move you to the HEAD of the bread line and you'd still ask for toast...

Were you expecting skittles? Did you get skittles? Were you expecting a little something to pad your wallet and grease your way through the Government? Did you find something? Do you have a problem with this?


Use what you've been given, Go past the People's clinic and get some cough syrup, stop by the concession stand and get some beverage (KEEP THE CHANGE!); Use the skittles and make up some fire-assed lean (aka purple drank) and sit in the back of the courtroom, watch the little judge waddle around in his robes and pontificate about what a slug I and my esteemed co-defendant am/are (he could take lessons from my wife, he's not very good at this)


Dammit man, once you're bought, STAY bought.


And WHERE is Krasnodar? At the rate we've been partying when we run out of the good stuff we're going to have to start re-filling bottles with the stuff we brewed in the tractor barn and that takes INVENTORY! I showed his picture to the girls, and they agreed that Krasno might not need CHANGE, but HOPE giggled and said she could do him a world of good...

Whoa Comrade Tov! Slow your roll bro! Not complaining about the bribe bogus bill! Only I've got a black market guy gentleman who'll exchange it for real cash (75 on the dollar) so it's all good. I was just bringing it to your attention that maybe you'd better check your xerox copier closer. Other Comrades might not be sooooo understanding! (Like Craptek)

Whew! I was afraid we were starting to haggle over price. Have a shot of the good stuff before the nightly crowd rolls in. Try one of these.. the kitchen wenches are skilled at carving beets to look like flowers and animals...

Myself, I'm nibbling on a deliciously fried potato hammer and sickle, dipped in beet sauce, with a sprinkling of 'Dillo Dust (sent to me by LaRue Tactical of Texazistan and remarkably delightful on beets and potatoes, as well as the traditional steak).

Comrade, did our Secretary of Defense Brain ever show up? It's possible that he couldn't see through those briefs he was wearing the last time I saw him and got lost.

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Good news R.O.C.K. and Tovarichi - your co-counsel from Canada has arrived... the estimable Rob Ford!

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Myself, I'm nibbling on a deliciously fried potato hammer and sickle, dipped in beet sauce, with a sprinkling of 'Dillo Dust (sent to me by LaRue Tactical of Texazistan and remarkably delightful on beets and potatoes, as well as the traditional steak).

Comrade, did our Secretary of Defense Brain ever show up? It's possible that he couldn't see through those briefs he was wearing the last time I saw him and got lost.

Comrade, I have not seen him since late last night. He hasn't changed his fluid lately and has been seeing a bit fuzzy...Last I heard he was muttering something about going "out to the truck behind the courthouse with Mary-Kate and Ashley..."

We know where all of the little meatballs went, I fear that our counsel has... well, we may never know...

(sorry about the large image, they just need more pixels than average girls...)

Tovi, is it just me or does this show trial appear to be fizzling out?

As you know, we have a Very Important Concert & Party to attend with Laika and friends, and I postponed it so we could make a show appearance, but - well - other than last night's over the top party it hasn't been much of a show trial.

Of course, the Tea Party Progressive Prole girls did say they were up for another night of wild partying studying the writing the writings of Karl Marx in the judge's chambers... shall we?

Are we out of pudding, btw?

Fear not, my six-stringed Comrade, People's Store #86 got a fresh shipment of powdered milk, we can dilute what pudding we have left and still achieve a useable consistency... should provide a couple of hours of semi-solid entertainment!

I think whatever is left over tonight goes to Mary-Kate and Ashley. That will keep us from an EPA violation (wouldn't the Commodore love to sink his little bitty hooks into THAT one!) and maybe keep them from the appetizer trays long enough for our other guests to have a nibble.

I sense you are right, the tempo of this trial seems to be fizzling. This is glorious news, as our innocence is all but assured! Especially if we can get pictures of the Frau in the chocolate pool with the Commodore.

I'd have had that shot last night, but Comrade Counselor Betinov was using my camera to take selfies ( I still don't understand how he does that...)

Ah yes, that Snoogie/Fraulein daliance was truly a marvel to behold! Who would have thought that our dear Comrade Fraulein's body could be so flexible?!? Amazing... and fortunately, I caught a couple of photos with my Obamaphone, so we definitely have some leverage - although it certainly doesn't compare to the "leverage" the Commodore was getting last night!

As you mentioned, our innocence is surely apparent to all, so hopefully we can get on with the concert schedule. Those Sov-Tek tubes in my amplifiers, while the very best in progressive sound technology, won't hold up forever to the cold of space in that U-Haul parked next to Laika's space station!

Darned good thing our drivers are union, the skill required to park a trailer in three dimensions at orbital speed doesn't come without training and experience!

I don't think the Russians will miss that antenna array, do you?

Antenna? Your new light and speaker stand can work as an antenna? Can we get Amerikkan tv reruns of Baywatch on this antenna?

Where is everybody? Is the trial over? Is there any leftover pudding? Comrades! I found a bunch of 100's acorns in a pack of skittles out back. Comrades! Anybody here? Comrades! I just parachuted in to hear the sentencing! Geez....I spend a few hours at the casino laundry and everybody leaves! Your Honor! I Object!

In another thread (about the poor Glitch Girl)

Tovarichi wrote:You know, she's still the right image for Obamacare. Sold to us as one thing, but upon closer inspection...

I did hear in the hallways of the People's Clinics that if you have to pass it to see what's in it, its a stool sample.

In the third sentence, Tovarichi exhibits exactly the political insights we need for someone to become the "Speaker of the House of The Peoples Cube" when our Progressive candidates regain control of the House and gain a 100% majority in the Senate in the November 2014 elections as the LIVs turn out in massive numbers to express their appreciation for ObamaCare. Then our HHS and the ObamaCare Division of the IRS will promulgate regulations for regularly subjecting Tea Partiers to the stool-sample regimen, under which constipation will suitably become a federal felony.

Surely a man with such insights and potential for being Speaker of the House of The Peoples Cube cannot fairly be barred from the Inner Circle, which is surrounded by the Outer Circle inside the Outer Cube, which sits atop the inverted Lower Pyramid balanced upon the tip of the Fickle Finger of the Cosmos. And, of course, it's the Fickle Finger that will be used by the ObamaCare Division of the IRS to extract compliance by constipated Tea-Partiers rejecting ObamaCare.

--KOOK (aptly named)

ORDER IN THE COURT!!!!!

Good Lenin, I knew I should'a put you two in lock-down during the trial.........Now listen up and listen good!!!

Cause it's SENTENCING TIME........

The PEOPLE'S COURT has found you NOT GUILTY of actually embracing TEA Party ideology and betraying the Party..........NOW COOL YOUR JETS with the celebrations and high fives......... but the court has instead found you GUILTY of going after a little 'embracing' of a different sort, that given the deviousness of the TEA Party she-devils allowed you to fall into temptation. The court acknowledges that your next concert is out in space and will put you far away from their clutches, which will allow you time to think and rehabilitate yourselves.

The Court also finds you GUILTY of improper use of diesel fuel, use of Atomic wedgies without proper permits and not cleaning the kitchen sink, that we threw in there with all the other charges. However, the court acknowledges that these are lesser offenses that do not warrant a death penalty......The Court has to acknowledge that the defense Attorney assigned to these two would have made even Bill Clinton proud with his, "it all depends what your definition of 'is' 'is' defense.

Therefore it is by order of this COURT:

That Comrade R.O.C.K in the USSA and Comrade Tovarichi are sentenced to perform a charity concert with all proceeds going to the victims of Post Atomic Wedgie Syndrome (P.A.W.S). This will also ensure that there will be no groupie temptations during your rehabilitation as they look like dogs even after a night after heavy drinking.

THIS COURT IS NOW ADJOURNED.......!!!!!!!

Quitter.

We didn't even get to account for the fuel because of the distances of travel for the USSO shows ROCK does for our IRS agents in training, and the concerts at the FEMA relocation/re-education camps that dont exist and dont need fuel or per-diem expenses to not get to (wink wink nudge nudge...) that we didn't go to in three states.

Anybody want some pudding? We have some left over.

Well...it appears that Party Justice has been served (along with copious amounts of pudding, beet vodka & willing yet nubile prog prole women)! Yes...Party Justice is paid for swift justice. I can only hope that when my time comes to appear before the dock (it's not a matter of if...but when) I will be treated with the respect & honor that this court has shown the accused...**coughing fit** To be guilty before being found guilty is the ultimate gift a humble Party Member can give to The People. We are all guilty Comrades...get used to it.

Sorry, lads. Got stuck in a thigh wrinkle and only just now pulled free. What did I miss?

Let's see...just give me a minute to read through this sentencing....

Ah. Dismissed, dismissed, justified, ignored, incoherent rambling....

And that's how Cube justice is served...with a side of pudding.

Most excellent, comrades, especially Comrade Commodore - whose judgely wisdom is second only to the former Judge Fraulein Pulloskies, herself a paragon of judicial honor and benchly pudding, not to mention ravishing and stuff.

I'd like to take a moment to thank our counsel, Comrade Ivan "Brain In Jar" Betinov (and also to pour a pint or so of beet vodka into that rather cloudy jar). Well done, comrade, at least during those occasional fleeting seconds when you were here with us in court.

I shall commence to writing a second R.O.C.K. Opera for the upcoming P.A.W.S. concert - I'm tentatively entitling it Wedgies Without Borders.

Thanks to all, and Comrade Tovarichi? The girls are waiting in the limo...

I do hope they brought their welding equipment.