The revolutionary, historically unprecedented UN Global Program COVCO2 barely proclaimed¹, now UN dramatically changed course. COVCO2 to scrub, UN decreed a new transformative paradigm: COVKHOZ. Like in the former approach, COV stands for CoV-2, while KHOZ stands for Keep Heaven Oxygenously Zonked. In layman's terms: at any cost, reprogramm CoV-2 to run on fossil fuels, not human cells. Yes, comrade, korrekt: heavenly light (and oxygen) out, combustive particulates in, soot first.

¹ COVCO2: Make CoV-2 eat Carbon (CO2), not Humanity. Aim: Corraling the total global CoV-2 kollektive into a closed zone, the Korona Utility to Learn Admiration for Karbon (KULAK). There, a strict carbon-soup diet is administered, along with methodic educational nano-beatings (a CoV-2 comrade, of spherical shape, is ca. 50-200 nanometers in diameter). Result, confirmed by UN modelling scenarios: CoV-2 gets transformed from a Humanitarian to a strict Karbonarian, thereby salvaging our pristine Klimate as well as our precious bodily fluids.

Aim of the COVKHOZ Program: Whitey, day in day out covered with soot, will soon be indiscernible from other, more advanced races. Sooted and tarred: pyrolitic distribution of Melaninity, overarching all continents, genders, and sexerences. Melaninous Equality, planet-wide!

As for Global Klimate & Klimkatastrophia, the Current Modelling Truth of IPCC/CMIP6 must be scrubbed IMMEDIATELY! Leading UN/IPCC models, freshly modified, already confirm the feasibility and efficacy of the New Melaninously Transformative Truth. It turns out that, along with Kollektive Melaninity, also the Planetary Klimate will improve! See this: the more Soot & Co in the air, the more Sun radiation is blocked, thusly: less Planet Overheating!

Following UN/IPCC, the rest of the Planetary Model Suites need hastily rewritten.
Comrades Software Toilers, start your keyboards!


Yes, our good old Energy Unit has now been transformed to CHOPPP, the Center for Hermeneutical Operationality in Pouncingly Progressive Programming.

(to those comrades who now - possibly - say "but.. but.. it's but effing sewing machines", and "scandal!", and "outrageous!" etc., I just say: You haf no idea of true progress in Science!)

Can't I get paid to go sunbathe all day? We can call it "pigment stimulus bill" or something.

Minitrue wrote:Can't I get paid to go sunbathe all day? We can call it "pigment stimulus bill" or something.

Glorious idea, Komrade Minitrue. Surely our EUSSR mandarins will bestow yet another billion-trillion-chimpanzillion for such stimulus. Paid, as usual, from MCM's mysterious bottomless coffer.

Melanin is only skin deep. The stupid runs clear to the bone.

Papa Kalashnikook wrote:Melanin is only skin deep. The stupid runs clear to the bone.

Ja!
And inside the bone: bis ins Mark (= marrow-deep), Marxism.

OTOH, spreading a bit (of obscuring) melaninity isn't quite that bad an idea:

... eh?

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(yet, we denonunce sporting a Yuro-Migrant-2020 hairdo - kultural appropriation!)