Image

Trump Causes Massive Hurricanes in First Term

9/9/2017, 4:43 pm
User avatar
trump-hurricane.jpg

Florida and the entire Caribbean are bracing for a barrage of hurricanes caused by President Trump - a Global Warming Denier.

For the 8 Obama years, there were no hurricanes - Florida, the gulf coast and the entire Caribbean were spared the savagery of nature made angry by global warming deniers.

Now, in only his first term, Trump has unleashed these monstrous meteorological events that are shaping up to be nothing but catastrophic.

It is believed that he has taken possession of a Russian Hurricane Generator to unleash on the voters of Florida who criticized his global warming denials.
Back to top
9/9/2017, 4:47 pm
User avatar
giant-fan.jpg

Trump is putting a devious plan into place to destroy Florida. We suspect Russian and Mossad involvement...
Back to top
9/9/2017, 7:53 pm
User avatar
What no one understands is that Comrade Puppet Trump never colluded with our friends, the Russians.

HE COLLUDED WITH SPACE ALIENS!

And these storms are their doing. To hide their gigantic space ships from view while they position themselves in our skies.

Ever notice how these storms always have the same shape as a giant flying saucer? That is not a coincidence, Comrades.

I don't know how many more are out there in space, getting ready to come in, but when they're in position, they'll pull the lever and unleash the most terrible weapon of all:

GLOBAL WARMING

And we'll all be dead.
Back to top
9/10/2017, 4:27 am
User avatar
Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:What no one understands is that Comrade Puppet Trump never colluded with our friends, the Russians.

HE COLLUDED WITH SPACE ALIENS!

And these storms are their doing. To hide their gigantic space ships from view while they position themselves in our skies.

Ever notice how these storms always have the same shape as a giant flying saucer? That is not a coincidence, Comrades.

I don't know how many more are out there in space, getting ready to come in, but when they're in position, they'll pull the lever and unleash the most terrible weapon of all:

GLOBAL WARMING

And we'll all be dead.
I feel triggered by the word "aliens." Perhaps you meant to say "undocumented terrestrials." And I think feel we should welcome these poor refugees and immediately give them EBT cards and voter IDs. Oh, but wait ... you did say they were Trump supporters, did you not? Then fie upon them! Let antifa beat them up. Oh, but wait ... they want to radically transform Amerikkka, correct? Well, then, let us welcome them ... but no, they are colluding with Trump ... oh, dear, once again I am thoroughly confused.
Back to top
9/10/2017, 8:32 pm
User avatar
RedDiaperette wrote:
Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:What no one understands is that Comrade Puppet Trump never colluded with our friends, the Russians.

HE COLLUDED WITH SPACE ALIENS!

And these storms are their doing. To hide their gigantic space ships from view while they position themselves in our skies.

Ever notice how these storms always have the same shape as a giant flying saucer? That is not a coincidence, Comrades.

I don't know how many more are out there in space, getting ready to come in, but when they're in position, they'll pull the lever and unleash the most terrible weapon of all:

GLOBAL WARMING

And we'll all be dead.
I feel triggered by the word "aliens." Perhaps you meant to say "undocumented terrestrials." And I think feel we should welcome these poor refugees and immediately give them EBT cards and voter IDs. Oh, but wait ... you did say they were Trump supporters, did you not? Then fie upon them! Let antifa beat them up. Oh, but wait ... they want to radically transform Amerikkka, correct? Well, then, let us welcome them ... but no, they are colluding with Trump ... oh, dear, once again I am thoroughly confused.

Comrade RedD,

Not to fret. Here. Lap up some warm, fortified milk. Have a cookie. The end is near.

Image
Back to top
9/11/2017, 12:15 pm
User avatar
Even as I type these words our valiant Director is addressing the Party Congress on the recent flooding of Farming Collective 37 in Houston. But I can state unequivocally that there will be no reduction in the beet ration this Winter thanks to the foresight of the Director who had ample stockpiles stored in Florida warehouses.

Hold on, I just received an urgent communique from the People's Storage Unit in Tampa... Oh crap! Umm, as I was saying, there will be no reduction in the vodka ration this Winter. Why eat beets when you raise a glass to the wisdom of the People's Director?
Back to top
9/17/2017, 10:51 am
User avatar
A very enjoyable account of how MSM covers natural disasters. Read the whole thing on Taki's Mag.

The Hurricane Algorithm

Joe Bob Briggs wrote:News executives love disasters. They get to act like Chuck Norris and Assemble the Squad.

“Maginnis, you cover first responders.”

“Wilson, get over to NOAA and stay on those maps.”

“Kelly, official press briefings. Work with Yurozawski to keep tabs on every emergency room within a 300-mile radius.”

“Bergram, you're Cop Shop, but we'll keep the aperiodic radio tracking the locals.”

“Ramstein, find that German guy who gets a hard-on for global warming.”

By the time a managing editor or a news director gets finished “covering this mother like blubber on a seal,” you've got thirty people who feel like they're crammed into a D-day troop carrier, waiting for somebody to throw open the landing door and engage the Nazis. They have lust in their eyes. They're hopped up like nekkid trance drummers at Burning Man.
Back to top

 
POST REPLY

Return to “People's Blog”