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US Army is OFFENSIVE!

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Naming Our Military Helicopters ‘Apache', ‘Blackhawk', Is ‘Injustice'


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The Apache, Black Hawk, Comanche, Cheyenne, Chinook, Kiowa, and Lakota.

To the managing editor of the Boston Review, Simon Waxman, the use of Native American tribe names for military helicopters is a shameful injustice, perpetrated by the American government.

As a former pilot of said aircraft forced to fly in order to feed my family, I had no part in naming these machines, but "shameful injustice" indeed. And the saddest thing is that my beloved AH-64 (pictured above) are a symbol of aggression against our mooslimic comrades...

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Fortunately, Comrade President B. Husseinovich Obama I is removing all 192 Apache helicopters from the National Guard.

The teabaggers have naturally speculated that they were being taken from the National Guard and given to the Army because they are attack helicopters armed with hellfire missiles and such and would get in the way of Comrade Obama's coming Martial Law Extravaganza, but now the truth is out - we all know how much he hates the Army, and giving these racists helicopters to them is merely a sign of spite and ridicule!

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Renamed helicopters

Apache: Anglo

Black Hawk: White Death

Comanche: Craptek

Cheyenne: Trail of Tears

Kiowa: Klansman

Lacota: Imperialist

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Comrades, Progressives have always struggled with those Indian names and had difficulty uttering them without vomiting, perhaps these would be a better choice:


Retreat, Surrender, Redeployment, Appease, Capitulate and Re-Set
While we are suggesting new names, how about painting them in rainbow colors rather than that old fashioned olive drab. Just think we could also promote an outreach to gay and lesbian communities as well. A Win, Win for all Americans! This is truly exciting.....
Forward

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I think we need to look into dunning Government Motors for the inexcusable racism of having named pickup trucks Cheyenne and Apache in the 1950s and 1960s. Sure, this may bankrupt the company, but we can always bail it out with taxpayer money and pad a few union pockets in the process.


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I live in Arizona and know that actual Apaches like the fact that the AH-64 is named after their tribe... in particular because it's so bad-ass !

But who are they to have an opinion about it, when some guy in Boston complains ? !!!

It is not the purpose of an army to be offensive!

It is truly written by Dear Leader, "The best defense is to reduce the funding for the military, destroy their equipment after use, conciliate one's enemies, and whine 'Don't hit me!' when threatened."

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And indeed, what of Air Force "Jolly Green Giant" H-53 helicopters?


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For a creature covered in cat spit, you have made an astute observation.


Where is the outrage of FLATUS Moochele, Oprah, Rosie 'Donnell, Sheila Jackson-Lee, and Nancy Pelosi over the Air Force still flying the A-10 Warthog?
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[img]images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img]

Tovarich,

Please stop comparing these people to something that does its job well. Which of course means that our beloved administration wants to "retire" it . Just like our three space shuttles.

Rule of Government : If something works, get rid of it.

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trashmouth wrote:Comrades, Progressives have always struggled with those Indian names and had difficulty uttering them without vomiting, perhaps these would be a better choice:


Retreat, Surrender, Redeployment, Appease, Capitulate and Re-Set
While we are suggesting new names, how about painting them in rainbow colors rather than that old fashioned olive drab. Just think we could also promote an outreach to gay and lesbian communities as well. A Win, Win for all Americans! This is truly exciting.....
Forward
Bravo Comrade Trashmouth. Since no one likes vomiting too much, we all need to be more sensitive by renaming everything (including rules of engagement), and just be happy, jolly, and free. Why can't we all just get along . . . and in foxholes too?

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El Presidente wrote:Renamed helicopters

Apache: Anglo

Black Hawk: White Death

[highlight=#FFFF99]Comanche: Craptek
[/highlight]
Cheyenne: Trail of Tears

Kiowa: Klansman

Lacota: Imperialist

Comrade El Presidente,

I will see to the destruction of our enemies - whoever they are! (who are they?)

RAH66-Craptek-2.jpg

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God Speed Captain Craptek...


don't forget what you are fighting for!
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Comrade Putout wrote:don't forget what you are fighting for!

So that is why the Craptek's, ah, erm ... "probe" ... is extended!

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Captain Craptek wrote:I will see to the destruction of our enemies - whoever they are! (who are they?)

Uhhh, Captain?
I hate to disappoint, sir, but due to recent cuts in military spending to coincide with America's new "light footprint", the "Craptek" has had some minor redesign modifications.

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...and it will be re-named as the "George Armstrong Custer" after the officer who did so much for native-american relations with the Government...

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Red Walrus wrote: Bravo Comrade Trashmouth. Since no one likes vomiting too much, we all need to be more sensitive by renaming everything (including rules of engagement), and just be happy, jolly, and free. Why can't we all just get along . . . and in foxholes too?

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Well, at least the face of the military will be better! And now with new names...
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S/he approves!

trashmouth wrote: While we are suggesting new names, how about painting them in rainbow colors rather than that old fashioned olive drab. Just think we could also promote an outreach to gay and lesbian communities as well. A Win, Win for all Americans! This is truly exciting.....
Forward

Instead of being so offensive - this is how our military should be:


I think all 58 genders appreciate the new military!

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anonemous1 wrote:
Red Walrus wrote: Bravo Comrade Trashmouth. Since no one likes vomiting too much, we all need to be more sensitive by renaming everything (including rules of engagement), and just be happy, jolly, and free. Why can't we all just get along . . . and in foxholes too?


Well, at least the face of the military will be better! And now with new names...

S/he approves!

trashmouth wrote: While we are suggesting new names, how about painting them in rainbow colors rather than that old fashioned olive drab. Just think we could also promote an outreach to gay and lesbian communities as well. A Win, Win for all Americans! This is truly exciting.....
Forward

Instead of being so offensive - this is how our military should be:

I think all 58 genders appreciate the new military!

Bravo...but,...it must master the art of synchronizing mouth and voice-track before advancing to finals. (that's voice-track comrades, mouth and voice-track!

Comrade أوباما is doing a splendid job effeminizing our military, don't you agree!

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How about a nice color-coded system of identification? Instead of The Tomahawk we could have "The Fuschia Missile"; instead of The Apache helicopter we could have "That nice Green one over there"; instead of the A1 Abrams we could have a fleet of Pinkies (no relation) like this:Image

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<off>
Yep, I'd put a missile or two into that one just to count the hang time on the turret as it flies through the air...the hull will burn for 8-12 hrs depending on fuel and ammo on board...Amnesty International my ass.
<on>

A fleet of Pinkies...oh the carnage that would be capable of!

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Krasnodar wrote:Image
Tovarich,

Please stop comparing these people to something that does its job well....

Indeed, though it would be acceptable to put Moo's mug as nose-art on a B-52 ... the crews could then still (and perhaps more) appropriately refer to it as a BUFF.

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AbecedariusRex wrote:How about a nice color-coded system of identification? Instead of The Tomahawk we could have "The Fuschia Missile"; instead of The Apache helicopter we could have "That nice Green one over there"; instead of the A1 Abrams we could have a fleet of Pinkies (no relation) like this:Image

Image That's not an M1 Abrams... but that's not what I really wanted to say - just wanted to relate a story that happened when I was in 2nd Armored Division at Fort Hood. First off, we had been instructed that the armor on the M1 is classified and if it ever gets exposed, we are to protect it from disclosure. Well, one day, the driver on my tank ran over a small tree and ended up throwing the track off — and the track "chain-sawed" the front-right track armor exposing the insides and broke the hinges as the track came completely off… Needless to say, I was quick to pull out my camera and snap off a couple pics before the mechanics or any higher ups showed up to investigate. But, my tank commander let them know I took the pictures, so they confiscated the film. I ended up having to guard that piece of armor for over 24 hours out in the field by the side of the road. Although I do not have any pictures to show — one thing I can attest — I believe the reason that they wanted it classified is that the insides of the armor is it is pink! The same color pink as that self-propelled artillery piece above. Kind of fitting :-)

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The "pink" would probably be the ceramic part of the Chobham (sp?) armor.

Oh, and Craptek? sorry, but they've cancelled your ride.

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Image Don't worry about Craptek, theres always a ride for him...

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[color=#C0392B]Tovarichi[/color] was being just plain mean when he wrote:Don't worry about Craptek, theres always a ride for him...
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After seeing the way you treated Red Salmon I am not surprised!
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Speaking of rides... here's Tovarichi in his garage reminiscing about the good old days on his Russian scooter bike. Nice posters, dude!
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Tovarichi ....... your idea has merit.

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Gotta' love that concussive detonation of HE ordinance !

And scratch one pink armored vehicle.

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Tovarichi wrote:Image Don't worry about Craptek, theres always a ride for him...

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Captain Craptek wrote:
Tovarichi wrote:Image Don't worry about Craptek, theres always a ride for him...

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Captain Craptek, you know it is risky to show our military intelligence here. We have capitalist spies running around here.

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All this yammering about putting Captain Craptek behind the controls of a politically correct named helicopter. It looks like I have to remind the collective of our 'flying squirrel' and some of his past efforts about the wild blue yonder.

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And who could also ever forget this graceful landing.

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Commodore Snoogie Woogums wrote:All this yammering about putting Captain Craptek behind the controls of a politically correct named helicopter. It looks like I have to remind the collective of our 'flying squirrel' and some of his [highlight=#ffff99]past efforts[/highlight] about the wild blue yonder.

Commodore,

As you know, The Party considers "past efforts" mere "accretions of history" and therefore subject to reevaluation in light of current truth. Ask Comrade Putout about my (ahem) skills... Also, I refuse to get my rotary wing certification till helicopters are perfected!

craptek putout airplane-2jpg.jpg

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Captain Craptek wrote:
Commodore Snoogie Woogums wrote:All this yammering about putting Captain Craptek behind the controls of a politically correct named helicopter. It looks like I have to remind the collective of our 'flying squirrel' and some of his [highlight=#ffff99]past efforts[/highlight] about the wild blue yonder.

Commodore,

As you know, The Party considers "past efforts" mere "accretions of history" and therefore subject to reevaluation in light of current truth. Ask Comrade Putout about my (ahem) skills... Also, I refuse to get my rotary wing certification till helicopters are perfected!

craptek putout airplane-2jpg.jpg
The picture is fake, the plane you flew had a gun on it. It was during the great war against the tyranny and the capitalists.


 
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