Where is Your Festivus Spirit???!!!

KOMRADES!!!

I sense a descending -- an almost counterrevolutionary -- quality of Proghood posted to this most esteemed standard-bearing website.

Where in Obama's Green Earth are the Secular Humanist sanctioned references to FESTIVUS?



I have been preparing all this year to challenge Dear Reader (AP&PBUH) in the Feats of Strength... Alas, he has flown to Hawaii to avoid my challenge



Show me your POLES!!!
 

Thank you, Comrade, for sharing the video showing Dear Leader demonstrating the clear superiority of the Venus Factor workout he uses. With that workout and Flatus Moochele's diet plan we will all be healthy enough to pay for and not use Obamacare (as planned).
http://www.venusfactor.com
 

Why should Putin get ALL the credit for his manly exercises? As his mistress, I insist that Russian women also get credit for their womanly exercises:



Not only is Putin stronger than Obama, but Russian women are much stronger than American women as my colleague, Tatyana Kozhevnikova, demonstrates in her world-famous exercise video at her Intimate Fitness website.

--Putin's Mistress
 

Putin's Mistress helped me to see who my real friends are when she posted a link and

Why should Putin get ALL the credit for his manly exercises? As his mistress, I insist that Russian women also get credit for their womanly exercises:

--Putin's Mistress
.
To my new best friend on The People's Cube Putin's Mistress,

Thank you for that informative video link!

I just now returned two Christmas gifts I had planned to give to Captain Craptek and the despicable Ivan the Stakhanovets!

Comrade Putout
.
.
First this...




...and then this!

I hope you all noticed Captain Craptek can shape shift!

He is a sneaky little rodent!!




 

That woman could do some serious bodily harm, but what a way to go!. I'm keeping a safe distance from that one.

May, you are returning my gift before I even have a chance to say "thanks, but I feel bad that didn't get you anything (immediately establishing my status as a victim)". How can this be?
 

May, do you remember the last time you paid me a visit at The People's Cube foundry?

Perhaps this image will refresh your memory.




If you are curious, this anvil is not a working anvil it is a paperweight anvil but it does weigh about seven pounds plus the wire rope sling was a pound or two.

I hope I'm still invited to your Christmas party?

Ivan the Cube Maker
 

Comrade Putout,

A question if I may: When can I expect this feat of womynly strength to spur a new Olympic event? I envision great, hulking daughters of The Motherland sweeping up bronze, silver, and gold in the vaginal dead-lift, snatch, and clean and jerk! This new subject provides us a cornucopia of possibilities I hesitate to open - if you know what I mean!
 

Yes, and I almost forgot tractor pulls and the popular tug of war! It's endless, I tell you!
 

Thank GOD for Title IX.

 

 

I'm not sure whether to laugh, hide in a corner petrified, talk to Rolling Stone journalist Erdely or call Al Gore. Far too many choices. What does The Party™ suggest?
 

Raum Emmanual Goldstein

Show me your POLES!!!

Dear Leader, Comrade Putin and all others who worship at the altar of The People, I will gladly show you 6,296 of your Poles where they sleep in Katyn forest.



You might consider taking one second each to remember them. It will only take two hours of your valuable time.
 

Lev Termen

Raum Emmanual Goldstein

Show me your POLES!!!

Dear Leader, Comrade Putin and all others who worship at the altar of The People, I will gladly show you 6,296 of your Poles where they sleep in Katyn forest.

katyniwb.jpg

You might consider taking one second each to remember them. It will only take two hours of your valuable time.

Apparently, Komrades, we have moved on from the feats of strength an are now coming to the airing of the grievances!

May I remind you, Komrade Lev, of the wise words of Kom. Stalin: "One death is a tragedy; one million is a statistic" And since he I not address a few thousand, one may assume they o not even register.
 

Comrade Craptek, here is a Marxmas gift I'm sure you'll appreciate.



 

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt

Comrade Craptek, here is a Marxmas gift I'm sure you'll appreciate.


Thanks for the suggestion Kapitan, but Comrade Putout bought me one for Marxmas last year. Here's a photo of her getting ready to give it to me. I wish she'd waited till after I'd finished my,... err,... height adjustment treatment though.


 

She looks like she'd blow through a bag of nuts with very little effort.