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World War IV with the Wrong Rosie

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I did this as an illustration to World War IV with the Wrong Rosie, Roger L. Simon's review of Norman Podhoretz's World War IV: The Long Struggle Against Islamofascism, published on the sixth anniversary of 9/11.

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Roger L. Simon wrote:“You may not be interested in war, but war is interested in you.”

I kept thinking of that line – often attributed to Trotsky - when reading World War IV: The Long Struggle Against Islamofascism, Norman Podhoretz's analysis of the evolution of our current situation.

Not interested, indeed. What normal person would be? Like a lot of people, I was hoping Francis Fukuyama was right back in 1992 when he proffered the “End of History.” No such luck.

It was published in Pajamas Media on 9/11/07 but they wound up using only the top fragment of it.

The title and the general concept came from Roger. I also made him a hi-rez version of it to print out for the office.

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Oh my Go--Gah--Gospodin Lenin! What is that lying across her lap? Would that be the latest version of the Hildo-Hydra I've been hearing so much about?

What powers it? Sun, corn?

Perhaps wind? Specifically, continuous gusts of hot air, which might be a problem for the good folks in MA when Uncle Teddy's away, but definitely not for the likes of Rosie.

Or could it be fueled by something a humble prole like Pinkie shovels every day?

Wow! I wonder how many hours I'd have to stand in line just to get my name on a waiting list for one of those?

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Has a Norman Rockwell quality about it.



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Pinkie, that is the junior Hildo. The Hydra is for the time that company comes in. As you know, the original Hydra had many heads--up to 30 some say. But H8 likes to keep the company to a minimum, for it costs to feed them, they're hard to clean up after, and the silverware disappears.

The last confabulation was with Our Many Titted Empress; Mr. Reno, before she grew her second pair of hooves, that long ago; Barbara Mikulski; Ellen Goodman; Molly Ivins, before the rest of her was declared dead; Ann Richards, ditto; Rosie; Roseanne; Sheila Jackson Lee before she asked the director of NASA if they'd find the flag that the Apollo had planted on Mars; and of course Nansky Pelosky.

It took the same GE truck that is used to start jet engines to crank that one up, and when it did, the magnetic fields of the armature and windings pulled the nails out of the roof and the entire Rancho collapsed on Bruno who was in shock at the sight. I <i>told</i> him he couldn't take it--once I saw a bit of out of the corner of my eye and was hysterically blind. I had to pull him out from under the shingles.

Two weeks later there was a final tremor registering on the seismometer at Rice, and Our Many Titted Empress was a very proud porker for at least 15 minutes.

Then she started after the empty beer cans left by Rosie. I <i>hope</i> that she meant to cash them in. My imagination and what I overheard makes me think otherwise.

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I don't know what you have going on down there in Texas, Theocritus... but it is too damn progressive even for me. Jet engines? GE? NASA? Whoa... too much for me. And poor Bruno... poor stupid little Bruno. I bet he was shitting gerbils for a month after seeing such a sight!

Speaking of sights; all Party nomenklatura is invited to the Wilson's for a good 'ole fashioned elitist Georgetown cocktail party! I know! I know! I just got my invintation too! Supposedly we are all gathering to celebrate Valerie's third boob-job and Joe's sex-change operation. Ugh! I'm so excited! Oh, dress appropriately - and when I say "appropriately" I'm of course talking about leather... lots of leather (shouldn't be a problem for you, Theocritus).

I'll see you all at the party! Bring a designated pill-popping drunk driver! (Once again, shouldn't be a problem... we have every Kennedy on speed-dial).

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And the Kennedys are on speed-drive. Sorry.

Leather? Of course. Endangered species only. But this Joe. Is this a now-Joe or a then-Joe. Has the party perfected phalloplasty? If so, the stock in General Dynamics, the contractor for the Hildo Hydra, will take a hit in the stock market, and the Dow will decline a further 3%.

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"For Her Pleasure"... I have not seen that version of the Hildo yet. It looks electrically powered, and those seem to be some super high-voltage cables connecting it to a power source.

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Yes, 660V DC, the same as that running the NY subways. Which this is patterned after. But without brakes.

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I thought those were hoses for compressed air running from the pump, no? Isn't it how this Hildo portable operates?

The 660V DC version, I believe is for the portable iHildo.

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Yuck. I don't even want to imagine her using that thing, her entire body must jiggle for days after using it.
<shudders>

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Betty, it sets up moiré patterns in her cellulite which serve as diffraction gratings.

Actually, Red, the portable iHildo, the pocket stinger rocket, is powdered by cordite. It doesn't last long but you get a real bang with a bang.

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That must make it difficult to use in secret while in public areas.

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If she used it on the stage with Michael Moore no one would notice.

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The stage has not been built that can handle such stress.

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After the Party takes command of NASA for launching nuclear bombs into space <i>pour encourager les autres</i>, we can hold a party rally and for the stage use the vehicle which is used to transport the Saturn V and Shuttle.

That, if placed to make sure it is not on a tectonic flaw, will serve.

I think. But I'll be in Texas despite wanting to be in Orlando while I'll have Epcot all to myself.


 
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