Among the 260,000 new emails discovered during the latest email probe of Clinton's online conduct, the FBI has made the startling discovery that during Mrs. Clinton's time as Secretary of State, Clinton's yoga instructor received upwards of 1,000 top secret emails that were accidentally sent to her by Hillary Clinton.

The mix-up was a result of Clinton's careless use of her private email as a vessel for our nation's closely guarded secrets. At one point Clinton's yoga instructor even had the U.S. launch codes for the nuclear arsenal, keeping them on her unsecured laptop for several months before the mistake was caught.

Alongside the launch codes the instructor also received emails from Clinton that were originally meant for Vladimir Putin, in which the U.S. Secretary of State was asking the Russian President how much she could expect to see his offshore shell company donate to the Clinton Foundation in the coming months.

In other examples of the misuse of Clinton's emails, top officials who were expecting vital classified updates on events abroad, would instead receive pictures of cats with humorous captions, also known as "lolcats" - a practice popular with the elderly who often forward them to their friends and family using multiple CC lists.

Among state secrets received by the private yoga instructor was medical information describing Mrs. Clinton's health. In one email, an irritated Secretary of State was asking Clinton's private laundering service, where her favorite pantsuit was, after she had soiled her expensive custom-tailored pants during one of her "frequent" epileptic fits.

The discovery of the “Yogagate” emails has many experts seriously concerned about our nation's security under Hillary Clinton, given her loose handling of America's most sensitive secrets.

The release of newly discovered emails once again reveals the true daunting scale of Clinton's incompetency in handling sensitive information, making undecided voters doubt her fitness for the highest office.

Yet another seemingly innocent "yoga instructor" hacks into sensitive US documents?

I'm envisioning a conspiracy forming on the part of non-unionized and disgruntled yoga instructors.

The good news is that the ever-innocent MTE will be protected, and we find again another candidate for the "Vince Foster Retirement plan..."

This somewhat contradicts Hillary's previous statements:

Is der anything worse than a official government official type abusing der official government position for personal gain? No! That louse Comey wants to investigate all these here emails. He needs to come clean and resign. America demands Comey resign.

Like Stalin always said about solving da big political questions - No man, no problem.

Demand Comey resign. He can't get away with dis abuse of office. He's dangerous.