Pittsburg, PA -- This city of nearly 300,000 residents is down to only 740 full time police officers. Staff and budget shortages have forced some drastic changes, as explained by Police Chief Larry Scirotto.  "Look, we're not always a 'city of brotherly love' like Philly [Philadelphia, PA].  Pittsburgh is gritty and we have some crime.  However, we don't have enough officers for full policing 24/7.  So, we're transitioning to a 20/7 model of policing."

He continued, "The big change is no police will be available between 3am and 7am.  There aren't currently many calls during that time, so we figured the criminals must all be sleeping or whatever.  No sense in us paying officers to just drive around and do nothing, right?"

This change has been accompanied by a change in laws making it a crime to commit crimes 'when no police are available.'

It is rumored that the 'no police' hours will be expanded if this new model is successful.  According to Scirotto "I can see a day where we won't have police at all.  Won't that be nice?"

7am? Just in time for fresh donuts. This schedule of police personpower makes total sense. Every comrade knows criminals prefer to sleep late before clocking in for work.

Panem Et Circenses wrote: ↑

3/13/2024, 7:43 am

"The big change is no police will be available between 3am and 7am."  

In Houston, Texazistan, crime reports are closed using a code of not enough police staff.

The cases were suspended using a code implemented in 2016 that indicated there was not enough personnel to investigate the reported incident. Both the mayor and police chief now say it should have never even been created in the first place.

https://texasscorecard.com/local/housto ... ded-cases/

Wallyworld - The CODE says the case is closed, the Mayor says they're OPEN.

This whole concept makes as much sense as 'gun free zones.'