The collective finally has a replacement for the superstition known as "god"... it's Obama! Today, the prophet Rahm went up the mountain (actually, the attic of Obama's mansion in Chicago) and came back down with two stone tables (actually, a printout from Obama's web site until the page mysteriously vanishes) with these ten commandments which all who hope to be saved from economic or ecological armageddon must adhere:

I. I am the Lord thy Obama, thou shall not idolize other politicians before me.
II. Thou shalt not take the name of hope and change in vain.
III. Remember to keep holy my inauguration day and not mention the word "Blagojevich."
IV. Thou shalt honor my father and mother and not ask about my birth certificate.
V. Thou shalt not kill terrorists as we are the ones they have been waiting for.
VI. Thou shalt not commit adulteration of the environment by burning coal, oil, natural gas, etc.
VII. Thou shalt not steal except with the backing of Congress under the auspices of offically sanctioned bailout plans or public works projects.
VIII. Thou shalt not bear false witness against Obama, by which I mean bring up anything my office does not wish to be brought up.
IX. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife but feel free to step all over Sarah Palin.
X. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's goods (Chicago residents, check with your precinct captain.)

Obama commands us to build a vessel, the Ark of the Coverstory, which will be used to transport the holy printout to all important ceremonies and photo-ops. The ark will be 3 cubits long by 2 cubits wide by 1 cubit high and lined with gold. It will be adorned with the official Obama seal and the official slogan "Zero Posthumous" and contain a sheet of the Obama Commemorative Postage Stamps, each of which lists his resume in full. The Ark will be the base of a sedan chair to be sat upon by Oprah Winfrey (because she gave birth to his presidency) and carried about by 4 MSM journalists (because they have been carrying him all this time anyway.) The Ark will be accompanied by an entourage of fawning journalists, drooling pundits and babbling celebrities who will carry on their backs the backdrops and scenery from Obama's Denver and Berlin speeches in case the Lightworker wants to make more history somewhere or deliver some new commandments.

Are you sure the Ark of the Coverstory will be wide enough and strong enough to hold Oprah Winfrey?? I hear she's been stuffing her piehole with pancakes again.

Mmmm... pancakes....

Will the ark be lit by the aura of brilliance emanating from all things that have been touched by The One's™ hand?

I didn't know he was radioactive....

I hope there's some bailout money in the Ark for an offering to the 3 car manufacturers.

His Excellency will bring back some maple syrup from KKKanada for you, Premier Betty, when He makes His first trip there, after becoming POTUS. I like buttermilk, buckwheat and whole wheat pancakes with lots of butter. MMMMMM

It's important to note that the Ark will be covered by Oprah's ass when it's being used for a State ceremony.The VRWC will never defile such an important archive of Hope and Change!!

Komrade Zarkof wrote:Are you sure the Ark of the Coverstory will be wide enough and strong enough to hold Oprah Winfrey?? I hear she's been stuffing her piehole with pancakes again.

Well, Obama is all about "Hope" and if the damn thing collapses, that will be "Change."

Heading to the Monday's Obama Religious Organization of the Nation (MORONs) church. Why Monday, we prepare for the Progressive World of Next Tuesday.