Dear Comrades,

As you know from all of the news reports, Prog Progression towards the Progressive World of Next Tuesday is at hand.

Young Pioneers are enlisting in our Dear Leader's service by the thousands, the Government Motors Company, has rid themselves of hundreds of capitalist franchises and will soon install their own factory direct franchises with Prog worker management at the helm (at least, that is what I infer will happen). This is an exciting time, but the rocket booster of millions of capitalist tax dollars must be extorted extracted from other greedy capitalist companies, and as a result, many of these companies will go under.

As they go under, many comrades might find themselves out of work.

But, you must agree that the means justify the ends, and we all must make necessary sacrifices.

Not that our Dear Leader and his inner circle aren't working very hard to insure that one day, no one will be without,no child will be left behind, no comrade will be without shovel ready work, no cavity unfilled, no shovel left unused, no mother's son will ever go to war again, no bastard baby will ever miss his father, no bottle blond will ever be without hair bleach, no molesting uncle will ever be sent to jail, etc.

In the meantime, don't you agree that all comrades should be prepared to go through a transition period?

I hope you don't think I am being selfish, but I have set aside a few provisions.

Here is my list of what I have set aside:

1. Twelve packages of Clairol Permanent Wave Lotion
2. 1500 Q-Tips
3. 6 bottles of Fantasia Hair Tonic
4. Vaseline
5. A & D Diaper Rash Ointment
6. Tupperware
7. 1 extra double female connector hose for my pool cleaner
8. A Texas flag
9. 12,000 safety pins
10. 5 pairs of no-run pantyhose
11. 3 Plastic Banjos
12. 5 pairs of rubber gloves

Oh, there's more, but it's taking up too much space.

Okay, go ahead, tell me I'm selfish, if you will.

I know Our Dear Leader will provide for all one day, because he is the one who will make bring our glorious system to complete fruition in a way that it has never been done before, but, but, there will be sacrifices, and I don't want to be without my curls.

I'm very vain, you know.

And A & D ointment comes in handy for so many things: cow udders, beauty crème, diaper rash and nosebleeds. And safety-pins are most useful, too.

Comrade Leninka, you are correct. You correctly understand that in this time of Hope and Change, that some things might be in temporarily short supply, while a more equal and prog way of distribution of goods is worked out.

More on this tomorrow when I have had some sleep.

Comrade Leninka, you are indeed selfish. Just look what this poor old prole womyn had to suffer because of you hoarding of leftover kapitalist supplies. I believe you have ulterior motives for your action, such as running a black market??? I think an interrogation is needed.

Of the poor old prole womyn, naturally. Her expectations are too high. Please identify her for trip to gulag.

I'm so glad someone is hording something besides ammo. Maybe you should add a tampons to your larder. I seen on a survival TV show that they make great fire starters when there is no dry tinder.

Come to think of it, there should be a warning on every package of tampons advising women not to cross their legs and rub them together lest they burst into flames.

prog off

ROTFLMAO! Gives new meaning to bush fire...

prog on

Speaking of tampons - did the Workers Combinate Chetex-FemHygProd ever develop Marxipad style tampons? Or is it part of the next seven-year plan?

Comrades Genosse and Whoopie,

I can't stop laughing at your suggestions.

I'll admit, I haven't gotten a Jiffi-Lobo lately. The only way I can defend my actions is that I am hoarding on behalf of my comrades so that we may carry forth the revolution where others may falter.

We'll have to think of some more applications and bring them to the party's attention.

Of course there are more applications. Tampons are known to keep beet beer fresh after the bottle or carton has been opened. Perhaps as a cleaner for The People's Rifle.

The rifle cleaner is a good one. I had no idea they helped keep beet beer fresh.

I just got back to the house. And I did come up with a new use. Using a rubber glove, and stuffing one tampon in each finger, this creates a handy prosthetic.

Also: Hair curlers, blotters for when I give myself a perm, and if you lose your car oil plug on the road, it would serve as a temporary fix.

Tampons are also good for bandages, they soak up so much blood after all. Oh yes, and if you dangle one by a string,cats and Che monsters like to bat at it and play. Except the Che monster gets bored just batting at it as you hold it just out of reach, and always comes back with a shotgun instead. So you need to let your Che monster grab the tampon most of the time.

Genosse Pieck wrote:prog off

ROTFLMAO! Gives new meaning to bush fire...

prog on

Speaking of tampons - did the Workers Combinate Chetex-FemHygProd ever develop Marxipad style tampons? Or is it part of the next seven-year plan?

Comrade while I HATE BUSH!!!! Bush fires are a different animal entirely. Yes comrade, your order has been fulfilled by the Woompa Loompas:

You are forgetting the major use of Chepax or Marxipads. I'm primus inter pares as far as tears go. I can turn them on and off like a spigot. I can cry with the best of them, over anything which seems to be to my advantage.

But once the cameras are off, do you really <i>want</i> those tears to get on your fine couture? Of course not. Marxipads to the rescue!

I'm sure that His O'liness has a big honking box of Marxipads in readiness for the time, and it will not be long, when his speeches no longer sound sage but sound, well, tired, and then he wll go into Clintonian lip-biting mode and then the tears will start to flow. And he'll need Marxipads to keep things all dry so that he can go to a nightclub or play a round of golf.

Don't forget the usefulness of the glue on the back of the Marxipads, either. This enables one to stick a Marxipad under one's hat (fruited, or not) to absorb leakage from any Jiffi-Lobo opening.

And for proles who find themselves out of work, and are without any State issued footwear, Marxipads will make an excellent combo foot-pad and fill-in covering for holey shoe soles.

Red Rooster wrote:

Genosse Pieck wrote:prog off

ROTFLMAO! Gives new meaning to bush fire...

prog on

Speaking of tampons - did the Workers Combinate Chetex-FemHygProd ever develop Marxipad style tampons? Or is it part of the next seven-year plan?

Comrade while I HATE BUSH!!!! Bush fires are a different animal entirely. Yes comrade, your order has been fulfilled by the Woompa Loompas:

Oh, Comrade Red Rooster. What a package! I hope the other female comrades (Comrade Whoopie and Genosse) won't mind when I speak for them and myself in saying: we girls can always use a good plug.

Leninka wrote: Oh, Comrade Red Rooster. What a package! I hope the other female comrades (Comrade Whoopie and Genosse) won't mind when I speak for them and myself in saying: we girls can always use a good plug.

Leninka, Well, ah, thank you, ah, for ah, (*sniff*) admirin' my package.

I am rather dense, and do not know the genders most comrades here... which is of course very prog-post-modern, for we are all persons, and not individuals. And in our prog-post-modern world: ladies and gentlemen are an archaic construct, where pimps and hos now rule... and all other inter-gender relationships shall be like the fog gray mist of ambiguity.

So Leninka and other female Comrades, yes, we at the Woomba Loompa Wombat Factory are busy developing wonderous products for she-progs all the time:



The Girlish Joy of CHE Spotting! - Page 1<br>

The Girlish Joy of CHE Spotting! - Page 2:
https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopi ... &start=100

Leninka wrote:
Oh, Comrade Red Rooster. What a package! I hope the other female comrades (Comrade Whoopie and Genosse) won't mind when I speak for them and myself in saying: we girls can always use a good plug.

Comrade Leninka,

ewwww... As I am a member of the male persuasion (subject to change without notice), I reject and denounce your sexist plugs. I merely want tampons for the survivor packs I will hand out to the partisans in my paramilitary revolooshunary guard.

I denounce all for the sexist crime of thinking about gender. As we all know, gender is a (grammatical) construct and has nothing to do with the actual plumbing. I am currently engaged in a bill before the Texas House which would force the elimination of all urinals because it is unfair to womyn for men to get to stand to pee.

Henceforth it will be a misdemeanor for any man to pull over to the side of the road and recycle beer in the traditional way. Unless he's putting out a bush fire.

Genosse Pieck wrote:

Leninka wrote:
Oh, Comrade Red Rooster. What a package! I hope the other female comrades (Comrade Whoopie and Genosse) won't mind when I speak for them and myself in saying: we girls can always use a good plug.

Comrade Leninka,

ewwww... As I am a member of the male persuasion (subject to change without notice), I reject and denounce your sexist plugs. I merely want tampons for the survivor packs I will hand out to the partisans in my paramilitary revolooshunary guard.

Comrade Genosse,

My deepest apologies. I DENOUNCE myself for the mistake. Of all people, it is I who should be most sensitive when it comes to gender definition. You are right, too, about the usefulness of tampons. They truly are for the masses, and messes, and all holes.

Comrade Leninka, apology accepted. May Che and Comrade Vlad have mercy on your soulless, hermaphroditic body.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:I denounce all for the sexist crime of thinking about gender. As we all know, gender is a (grammatical) construct and has nothing to do with the actual plumbing. I am currently engaged in a bill before the Texas House which would force the elimination of all urinals because it is unfair to womyn for men to get to stand to pee.

Henceforth it will be a misdemeanor for any man to pull over to the side of the road and recycle beer in the traditional way. Unless he's putting out a bush fire.

I DENOUNCE you Commissar Theocritus for not clarifying what you mean about "thinking" about gender.

Did you mean by thinking that we cannot think to ourselves: "I wonder if Leninka is a boy or a girl, or is she a masculine, but feminine girl, or a feminine, but masculine boy, or a girl in a boy's body, or did you mean that we need to disregard Leninka's gender altogether?

Note to self: "Leninka, you are being too pestiferous with Comrade Theocritus. Leave him be"

Leninka, as a matter of fact I think about sex all the time. All men do. Men are pigs. And it doesn't matter what their orientation or identification is. I'm quite sure that somewhere, someplace there is a man who thinks about nothing all day except his fetish for say a footstool.

There's nothing wrong with thinking about sex, but Lenin help the man who tells a prog woman who comes in looking like a million dollars that she looks good.

Yes Commissar it is sexist to even open doors for ladies she-progs wombats, but somehow not sexist that they insist men do the filthiest jobs. A pig? What would one expect from one who is relegated to crawling through the mud and taking care of all the family left-overs?

Any Wombat Worth A Willy lives by the slogan: "Cake and eat it too!"

A lot of the Wombats that I know would rather say, "A taco and eat it too."

"Jungie Janet oh Janet where for art thou oh Janet... the tacos are ready in the Woompa Loompa Cafeteria. Oh, you'll take yours to go again eh? Did Lousy Louise lick all the lilly lollipops again? I know, I know, and she never gives you a turn... well, I'll tell Thyroid Thelma to thwack her thug throttling rations this week... Lousy Louise will never lick all the lilly lollipops again if she is threatened with thwacking her thug throttling rations."

Que Commissar, did ju say TACOS? Did I ever tell about the time in the Bario when 5 desparados danced the mambo with ice picks while the tamale cart rolled down the road and the low riders bouned to the Mexican Polka? My name was Ice.

I do love tacos, especially with a little salsa verde and lime! Mmmmmmmmm.... how decadent!

I denounce myself for thinking it!

Around the the Rancho we tend toward burritos.