CNN's finest interview since its inception in 1980

Anderson Cooper interviewed Jacob Blake’s father and then he asked questions about Jacob’s actions during the event that led to multiple deaths in Kenosha, Wisconsin this week. The father gave this bizarre response




Note: You might want to turn the volume up to hear what Jacob Blake's father says



 

Like many spiritual people, he speaks in parables.

"Let me tell you a story about Brussels sprouts. Once upon a time..."
 

Or maybe it was a story about how he tied a Brussels sprout to his belt.


 

Some comrades like Brussel sprouts.

Such clarity is profound these days, which totally confused Anderson Cooper.

But that's what parables do.
 

Comrades, this is clearly a reference to Brussels and their failures to unionize Europe. "How does this relate to Jacob Blake?", you might ask. The answer is simple. Failure to unionize leads to racial disparity leads to police shooting a black knife wielding wanted man, who was trying to steal a car and kidnap children, being shot in the back during a mostly peaceful resistance of arrest. It's not difficult to understand at all.
 

Brussel sprouts don't like you either


 

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt

... this is clearly a reference to Brussels and their failures to unionize Europe ...
Wow, that might be the ticket.
Brussels circus, and its endless failures...
If Komrade Minitrue peeks in here, he'll hip hop mad!

... but, but, the gist: Brussels sprouts ― a perfect roo-hippity-hoppity propellant, no?
 

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt

Comrades, this is clearly a reference to Brussels and their failures to unionize Europe. "How does this relate to Jacob Blake?", you might ask. The answer is simple. Failure to unionize leads to racial disparity leads to police shooting a black knife wielding wanted man, who was trying to steal a car and kidnap children, being shot in the back during a mostly peaceful resistance of arrest. It's not difficult to understand at all.

'pelipsky would like to request declassification from The Party™ to view non-redacted statement, your Kapitan Kourtship.