Anyone with two remaining brain cells to rub together knows instinctively that smoking isn't good for your health. How much actual damage it does, on the other hand, is a function of many factors, e.g., starting age; duration in years; number of smokes per day; genetic makeup, etc. In fact, it's so complicated that only the Federal Government is able to determine who should pay the health care costs imposed by smokers on society. Thankfully, Dear Leader has solved this dilemma in less than 2500 pages of easily understandable medical terminology and rudimentary legal jargon.

However, there are a few troublesome areas of the law requiring adjustment. It appears that unqualified computer programmers have mis-coded portions of the new health care law as it applies to the young, the old, penalties, insurance mandates, private vs. employer provided policies, premium limitations, required starting dates, and subsidies. Aside from these minor aberrations in implementation, everything is rolling out smoothly.

Although probably unnecessary for the sake of the average reader, The Daily Caller has attempted to summarize the elegant simplicity of the president's solution in the following story: dailycaller.com

As an unqualified computer programmer myself, let me explain that even though one's a data, two's a data, three's a data, four, it ultimately all depends upon exactly how one separates the pretzels from the doughnuts.

And, the current meaning of "doughnuts".

Indeed.

Ya know, comrade...since everybody seems to have left town, why don't you come over for a while. We could listen to your album - again - and finish this gallon of reserve beet vodka. I have a bucket full of potato(e) peelings - just the kind you like. (Oh, and bring your spare phonograph needle if you decide to drop by)

I may indeed drop by, Comrade, and thank you so very much for the invitation!

Say, you don't suppose Comrade Putout might make an appearance, do you? Assuming, of course, that she's still on the planet?

Ding...Dong...Guess who?

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This is sooooooo cozy... Thanks for the re-decorating, too!

Nice pad Comrade!