Oh my goodness, he ate Laika too?!

Not to worry Margaret - I just received this message, direct from Laika, on my bank of teleprompters!

ROCK in the USSA, how wonderful to see Laika is safe. I was about to ask if any Comrades had photoshopped pictures of Dear Leader having Laika over for a, uh, snack....

Have no fear comrades! Comrade Zero and I signed a non-aggression pact. That and a bribery of illegal Kobe beef and all the lobster Moochelle can snarf for life.

Thank goodness. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't know Laika was up there watching over us.

Laika the Space Dog wrote:Have no fear comrades! Comrade Zero and I signed a non-aggression pact. That and a bribery of illegal Kobe beef and all the lobster Moochelle can snarf for life.

Ya ain't fooling us, Comrade Hero Space Dog, we know you joined the witness protection program for its "side" benefits.

Please don't worry about me...I'm A-OK. It's my friend Snoop Dogg that you've have to pray to Lenin for safety. Snoop was recently invited to the White House for a "roast" and now he's in seclusion with George Zimmerman. Please don't say ANYTHING about Zimmerman hiding Snoop Dogg. Last place those White House chefs would go looking....Yo! We doggs are tight. Dig?

Whew! For a little while there I thought the market for Stimulus Brand Tin Foil was gonna tank. What a relief!

[a little later]

Hmmm, I wonder if this really works

[wraps head in tin foil]

Yo, Laika? Can you hear me now? Come in Laika...

huh? What? Who the #$%@ are you?

Whatayamean "ET Phone Home"? I think you gotta wrong number pal. Get off this line!

{bzzzt}

What? Mork calling Orsen? I don't know any Orsen! I'm trying to reach Laika! @$#% Aliens.

[rips tin foil off]

Oy friggin vey! I won't try that again!