Comrades,

I have returned from my re-education and I feel full of"Hope and Change". As you can see I am back, albeit shaved bald and a little bruised; but a better Progressive for it. As such I would like to share a little of my growth experience with you:

First, we are stripped and hosed down and our heads shaved for lice. We are then given our new internment uniforms and feed a fine meal of gov't cheese and leftover "katrina emergency meals" while Papa Obama's inaugural address is continuously played on monitors for us. Afterwards, we are separated into groups of male. female and whatever you felt you were, and led to our sleeping quarters. The rooms were spartan; but each was provided a TV (Obama channel only- all the time)and a copy of Papa Obama's Blue Book.

Daily, we both studied and worked. Our studies included things like the exploitation by "American imperialism" of workers in our country and others, the glory of labor and the inevitable victory of Progressivism, led by the Papa Obama, over the US and for the American people. We were also shown pictures of American's true enemies to remind us of what the Progressives are fighting against. Our work was made up of mostly helping the US Treasury print money and write promissory notes to the Chinese.

Of course, we did have the required standard "confession" of one's alleged misdeeds in the past. All "guests" in the camps were required to write confessions and perfect them to complete their re-education. We worked on these at night in our rooms.

Comrades, it was quite vigorous but nothing to fear. In fact, I would even recommend it as a possible alternative for family vacations.

As we leave, we are all given a 12 step program to follow and remind us of our Progressive duty:

1. We admitted we were powerless over unregulated thoughts—that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that the Power of Papa Obama and the State is greater than ourselves and could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of Papa Obama and the State as we understood them

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of dedication to social justice

5. Admitted to Papa Obama , to ourselves, and to another Progressive being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have Papa Obama and the State to remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Papa Obama and the State to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all progressives we had harmed, and became willing to make
amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such progressives wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them;others or the State

10. Continued to take personal inventory of our social justice causes and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought meditation to improve our conscious contact with Papa Obama, as we understood Him, asking only for knowledge of His will for us
and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a "social" awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to
carry this message to other Progressives, and to practice these principles in all our affairs for the State.

Comrade Neotrotsky,
Glad to hear that you have successfully completed the 12 step program to completely shed the outdated dogma of individualism and are now feeling all hope-y change-y. I can tell His teachings have fully restored your sanity you lost during the Bush Regime. The Word of Obama can do that if one just accepts Him into his heart. I keep my Pocket Obama book in my shirt pocket so that His teachings are close to my heart at all times. Praise be upon Him!

Solidarity 9-6347 wrote:Comrade Neotrotsky,
Glad to hear that you have successfully completed the 12 step program to completely shed the outdated dogma of individualism and are now feeling all hope-y change-y. I can tell His teachings have fully restored your sanity you lost during the Bush Regime. The Word of Obama can do that if one just accepts Him into his heart. I keep my Pocket Obama book in my shirt pocket so that His teachings are close to my heart at all times. Praise be upon Him!

Thank you comrade. The body is now ready for the work of the State

Comrade Neotrotsky

There is one more thing the collective requires of you before you can be rehabilitated.

You need to stop the flow of oil from the damaged BP oil rig in the Gulf with your own body. Sacrificing your useless proletarian life for the Noble Cause of Saving Gaia and the Greater Good will prove beyond doubt that you are indeed a true prog.

If you have any questions about it, please consult The Ghost of Rachel Corrie for the moral, ethical and philosophical grounds for such an act of Service.

This is so glorious. I have a tear... no, 2. I know, from most recent personal experience, the joy you are experiencing to finally "have your mind right(I hate that word!!) correct". We have all come to love Jiffy-Lobo for those quick tuneups and adjustments we need, especially that confrontations with the enemy. I had a unfortunate incident 2 weeks ago, went Rush Limblaff blasted through the gulag radio system... Jiffy-Lobo was there to given me that much need brainwashing indoctrinationreeducation installment.
And I love your new do. I know you haven't noticed, but, yes, it is like mine! I love to keep it short as a glorious reminded to my internment reeducation days.
Welcome back, comrade!

Congratulations Neotrotsky. I will forward your 12 steps of redemption to my client who is currently embroiled in a show trial. I will urge her to heed your glorious words.

Oh, I just received your paperwork by the People's Courier Service...

umm, yes, you do that Comrade Whoopie, as you attempt to make fraudulent accusation at the totally innocent amongst us, to divert attention away from the photographed guilt of your (troll of a) client. *&%$#@!!!!

Long live Obamo ObomObama!

Now don't be angry Fraulein, I'm just doing my job as Public Defender. Every condemned thought criminal deserves a vigorous defense. I'm sure once the People's Prosecutor cross examines the witnesses you'll be vindicated.

Comrade Whoopie wrote:Congratulations Neotrotsky. I will forward your 12 steps of redemption to my client who is currently embroiled in a show trial. I will urge her to heed your glorious words.

Oh, I just received your paperwork by the People's Courier Service...

Rehab doc Neotrotsky.jpg

Thank you comrade. Just be sure to return the original to the gov't of Hawaii for safe keeping

Obamugabe wrote:Comrade Neotrotsky

There is one more thing the collective requires of you before you can be rehabilitated.

You need to stop the flow of oil from the damaged BP oil rig in the Gulf with your own body. Sacrificing your useless proletarian life for the Noble Cause of Saving Gaia and the Greater Good will prove beyond doubt that you are indeed a true prog.

If you have any questions about it, please consult The Ghost of Rachel Corrie for the moral, ethical and philosophical grounds for such an act of Service.

I am on the first train comrade. I regret I only have one body to donate to my State

Comrade Whoopie wrote:Now don't be angry Fraulein, I'm just doing my job as Public Defender. Every condemned thought criminal deserves a vigorous defense. I'm sure once the People's Prosecutor cross examines the witnesses you'll be vindicated.

Well, praise be Obama, do I feel better now, dear loyal Comrade (justs as long as you don't forget who butters your beets... umm, am wondering, did that come out the way I meant????). Troll are trolls and comradics are comrades, after all. Dear Comrade Neo, the state feels the same.

Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:This is so glorious. I have a tear... no, 2. I know, from most recent personal experience, the joy you are experiencing to finally "have your mind right(I hate that word!!) correct". We have all come to love Jiffy-Lobo for those quick tuneups and adjustments we need, especially that confrontations with the enemy. I had a unfortunate incident 2 weeks ago, went Rush Limblaff blasted through the gulag radio system... Jiffy-Lobo was there to given me that much need brainwashing indoctrinationreeducation installment.
And I love your new do. I know you haven't noticed, but, yes, it is like mine! I love to keep it short as a glorious reminded to my internment reeducation days.
Welcome back, comrade!

Thank you Frau,,,, I too am reminded of the talents of your coiffeur. Rumor has it, it is the same one that does the hair of the First Lady

Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:justs as long as you don't forget who butters your beets...

Rest assured Fraulein, nobody butters my beets better.

"Best better butterer around!" that's what the dear late Mr. P would always say. He loved that as much as my homemade Beet - Goat Gonad soup.

Most perfect Defender Whoopie of the Most Innocent Mrs Al Czarweary... ME.... I have been of taking 12 step test and make for the answers. As you to see I have been of good answering and all are of korrektness.

1. We admitted we were powerless over unregulated thoughts—that our lives had become unmanageable.
hmmmm…. CHECK!!! How much more unregulated is mind of Moose-alimb womens? And that is reason for burkha wearing! Which is what I am of doing and so I am then of having accusings of being clothes horsing around person because the mens to be of keeping to use the burkha for the secret mens business and to be making the messes of the burkhas so all burkha wearing women must to have many burkhas for such cases. And all for this I to be of having such accusations to be made against me.

2. Came to believe that the Power of Papa Obama and the State is greater than ourselves and could restore us to sanity.

hmmmm…. CHECK!! How can there to be any thing of much greater sanity than to be wife of great freedom fighter who is second in command to Osama been Laidon? With such sanity I to believe anything.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of Papa Obama and the State as we understood them

hmmmm…. CHECK!! Have I not now been of living at Gulag and to be of so much enjoyment of The People ™ instead of at side of husband? Is that not great sacrifice? (do not make for answer of last question… holding of the tongue must to be of continuance…)

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of dedication to social justice

hmmmmm…. CHECK!! What better social justice there to be than to be of living underneath the Sharia Law which is most socially justification of all things?

5. Admitted to Papa Obama , to ourselves, and to another Progressive being the exact nature of our wrongs.

hmmmm…. CHECK!! I always telling of story of whenever underwives to make the wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have Papa Obama and the State to remove all these defects of character.

hmmmm… CHECK!! Have I not been of the good weight loosing since I to be here? Queen Mother Mo has been to put all the childrens on the diet and I to take courage in her words and so now I too have left defect of fatness behind.

7. Humbly asked Papa Obama and the State to remove our shortcomings.

hmmmm… CHECK!! I was of much shortness when I to first come to Gulag and now I am of tallness.

8. Made a list of all progressives we had harmed, and became willing to make
amends to them all.

hmmm…. ALA ZEG!! This is not to be of me. Progressives are always being the friends of the downtrodden class of Moose-alimbs and we are always of great positive reception for all of the helps we are to be of getting from the Progressives. Are we not to now have big mosque in shadow of World Trade Center? This not to be possible if not for Progressives who are of great understanding of plight of my peoples.

9. Made direct amends to such progressives wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them;others or the State

hmmmm… see #8

10. Continued to take personal inventory of our social justice causes and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

hmmmm… CHECK! Freedom fighting to all be just cause of all evil kapitalism. There can to be no wrong in fighting kapitalism.

11. Sought meditation to improve our conscious contact with Papa Obama, as we understood Him, asking only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

hmmmm…. CHECK!! I always to repeat Osama Osama Osama… oh you to be talking of other one?

12. Having had a "social" awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to
carry this message to other Progressives, and to practice these principles in all our affairs for the State.

hmmmm… CHECK!! I am to be always of enjoyment to help to take freedom fighting to all the peoples!!

As for you Frrrrrau.... I have made up special mushroom Camel Hump Soup just for you to be of sipping and to be of showing you there is not one hard feeling of me for such wonderful show trial. What to say you to come at my cave at 5ish?

Comrade Neo.... what is to be of happeing that so many are of being of head hairlessness? Frau to claim my pussy kitty if of hairlessness.... Comrade Buffoon to show foto of me looking to be of mostly head hairlessness.... Frau has been of admittance that she to be of head hairlessness... Leninka try to sell me to head hairless stranger man I not to have been of seeing before....

I am of ObamaHope that now with most wonderful certificate you can once again be of having such wonderful robust head hair wildness.

But first to make for suredness that we always to be of rememberance of all of the sacrifice you to be of doing for The People ™

Comradess Mrs. Al,
"As for you Frrrrrau.... I have made up special mushroom Camel Hump Soup just for you to be of sipping and to be of showing you there is not one hard feeling of me for such wonderful show trial. What to say you to come at my cave at 5ish? "

I take great delightfulness in your kindly invitation, I am sure, but this would not be of properness in consideration of your glorious Show Trial. And besides, I am afraid I am full (cough cough). Maybe another time after your guilt sentence as been completed the trial?

Ladies please, there's no need for this cattiness. Justice will take it's course, have faith in the system. As for Mrs. Al being bald, I believe the pictures I just entered into evidence will lay that rumor to rest.

And Fraulein, you really should try that mushroom soup. When I was visiting my client I saw it cooking over the fire, when she turned her back I snuck a taste. Quite yummy!

Ooooo, I feel a little dizzy and my stomach hurts. You'll have to excuse me, I need to go lay dow........aaagggghhhhh!

Comrade Obamugabe,

I was moved to tears by that concise statement of the relationship between the individual and the state. Were I not terrified of needles, I would consider a tattoo. Perhaps doing it with burnmarks from my collection of Sputnik brand cigarettes might work.

Comrade Tovarich

Tattoos are indeed a progressive way to show your commitment to Mother Gaia and to your Dear Leader.

When you do decide to get that Tattoo, please remember to get the spelling right:

O-B-A-M-U-G-A-B-E

If you make a typo on a tattoo it can be very difficult to correct.

AMANDLA!

Obamugabe.