Michelle Obama leaves for China tomorrow

FLATUS is taking Satchmo and Malaria (the royal offspring) and Grandma out for Chinese. Unlike the unwashed commoners, she will travel with the usual entourage of dog washers, strap hangers, three jets, and the usual "U.S. Taxpayer's Platinum Card", so that the cost of her enjoyment may be distributed across the paychecks of all over whom she rules.

Malaysian pilots familiar with the airspace have been contracted...

Comrade Tovarichi, I have just briefly - and partially - perused the glorious thesis of Comrade Mooochelle from her days at Princeton, mentioned in the article, and while it is filled with so-called grammatical errors and alleged punctuation mistakes and looks like it was written by a 5th grader, I have no doubt that this is simply because she wrote it whilst upon an intellectual plane much higher than that to which I have been able rise.

Like her husband, the Smartest Man in America, the Queen the FLATUS is simply amazing in her abilities, and I have no doubt that Malaria and Satchmo, their delightful offspring, will prove to be every bit as incredible as they grow older! It's good to see them traveling the world, giving the other nations the opportunity to admire and adore them as they spend huge amounts of tax dollars enjoy themselves as only royalty can!

How could she have known that her lofty thesis would have to be "simplified" with grammatical and spelling errors to let it appeal to the modern LIV's of today? Sheer brilliance.

I was truly moved at her story of overcoming the poverty of Harvard and Princeton (it is entirely possible that she might have been served as a guest once in the student cafeteria), eventually entitling her to the EBT funded amerikkan dream of the six figure " no-show" job.

Easily a weeks worth of programming for Oprah...

Comrades, apparently Moochelle's "mission" in China is in part to tell the Chinese children to "stay in school." Perhaps she missed the studies showing that Chinese children are superior in academics compared to, say, the children attending Chicago Public Schools. And a simple glance at the number of Asian students who are turned away from Cal Tech on the basis of "fairness" to (ugh) whites and people of a color other than white who didn't get the same SAT scores as the Asians, even with the requisite handicaps built into the scoring.

Comrades, the potential role of the first lady is to project a positive false illusionimage that her husband is a mere mortal even in America. Creating wonderful anecdotes to the press where her hard working husband comes home from a long day of beating Republicans and Rhinos into unconscious with a pen and phonework. After the initial press conference, I'm sure that she is quite willing to sit down with the leaders in China or any nation that seeks our destructionand apologize profusely for all the wrongs we continue to commit or have committed. No doubt the highlight of the evening will be the launching of the valued “School Lunch Program Tour” to all nations of the world. As progressives, we can at least agree with issues that are important to us.

The buffet will be ready for Empress Moo.

Comrades,

I have finished reading the entire FLATUS 14k+ word document and have only one comment. Any doubts I once harbored regarding Moochelle's grasp on the subject of flatology have been forever dispelled. A paragraph (below) taken from the "Conclusion" section of her paper is all you need to read. This single paragraph exemplifies the First Lady's mastery of a difficult subject and her thoughtful expression of complex human interactions.

BTW: The references to "sep/plur" and "int/assim" are explained earlier in the text as contractions of "separationist and/or pluralist" and "integrationist and/or assimiliationist" respectively. Hopefully, this will not confuse you more than following passage itself:

"By measuring relative comfort respondents feel interact-
ing with Blacks and with Whites as well as the time spent
actually interacting with Blacks and Whites, the respondents
ideologies, motivations, and ‘ attitudes towards the Black
lower class, the study is providing an idea of the respon-
dents' familiarity with Blacks and Whites, which will influ-
ence the extent to which respondents are attached to Blacks
or Whites, thereby indicating the extent to which the indi-
vidual identifies with Blacks or Whites. For example, a re-
spondent who spends increasingly more time with Blacks in
comparison to Whites or feels comfort with Blacks in compar-
ison to Whites or holds ideologies that are sep/plur rather
than int/assim, or is more motivated to benefit the Black
community as opposed to being unmotivated, or is more obli-
gated to the Black lower class, is more likely to be famil-
iar with Blacks as opposed to Whites, be more inclined to
become attached to Blacks as opposed to Whites and, thus,
identify more with Blacks as opposed to Whites."

*I hope you will all benefit from reading and re-reading the above paragraph until it sinks in fully. If only the founders of our country had understood these fundamental truths.

[img]/images/Michelle_Obama_In_China.jpg[/img]

Jubilant workers and peasants celebrate the arrival of Michelle Obama: "Yes we can live on vegetables, drink more water, and do all-day workouts!"

Tovarichi wrote: FLATUS is taking Satchmo and Malaria (the royal offspring) and Grandma out for Chinese. Unlike the unwashed commoners, she will travel with the usual entourage of dog washers, strap hangers, three jets, and the usual "U.S. Taxpayer's Platinum Card", so that the cost of her enjoyment may be distributed across the paychecks of all over whom she rules.

Oh, I'm so glad to see that she is only using the U.S. Taxpayer's Platinum Card and going full American Express Black Card - so we know she will be not spending all that she could.

The First Lady hopes to impose her 'Let's Move' program on China, saying "Better Red than Fed" [attachment=0]buffet.jpg[/attachment]

Not meaning to put such a fine point on your point, dear Tovarichi, but I believe the expression is "Goin' out for Chinx." Is that racist?

Go ahead and correct me, Pamski, it's my day...
It has also been pointed out to me that I inadvertently (some would say negligently) referred to one of the Royal Spawn as "Satchmo" when the proper interweb honorific title should have been "Sushi"

https://hopenchangecartoons.blogspot.com/2014/03/let-them-eat-rice-cakes.html

I shall report to Jiffy Lobo at once.

https://m.weeklystandard.com/blogs/cost ... 85814.html


((FLATUS + kiddies) (unofficial travel)) > ((Vice Premier Biden) (official travel))

Any questions?