Putin critic falls out window, dies

First this:

Pavel Antov, Russia’s “highest-earning elected politician,” was recently in India celebrating his 66th birthday when he reportedly fell to his death from a hotel window.

but wait, there's more...

In totally unrelated news, Antov had recently criticized Putin’s actions in Ukraine, characterizing air strikes on Kyiv as “terror.” Oddly, Antov perished shortly thereafter and just two days after a close friend of his unexpectedly died “from a heart attack.”

A chain of tragic accidents indeed. Back in the old days, when a troublemaker would be cleaning his handgun and it went off four times in the back of his head, or he slipped and fell on his own glacier-climbing ice-axe (while vacationing in Mexico), you knew it to be a true accident.

When will Russian dissidents learn to avoid open windows during the winter months? Isn't there an awareness ribbon for this? Perhaps an "I can't Breathe" style chant for a Soros-funded protest mob?

Not that it affects me, asking for a friend of course...

Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote: ↑

12/28/2022, 5:50 pm

Relax, Comrade, it's perfectly normal and common for critics of Putin people to fall out of windows in the Soviet Union Russian Federation.

Slippery floors. Discarded banana peels. Strong drafts. This fellow, for example, got dizzy and stumbled forward while trying to pet a cat:


At least that's what my Uber driver told me.

Vladimir Putin's Top Tank Commander DIES SUDDENLY Hours After Russian Leader Cancels Meeting To Discuss War In Ukraine

here we go again...

Alexei Maslov, the 69-year-old former Russian army commander and tank chief, passed away suddenly on Sunday in a Moscow military hospital.

but further down...

Maslov and Putin were set to meet hours earlier at the former general’s machine-building plant in Nizhny Tagil before Putin canceled the meeting unexpectedly and "at the last minute."

According to Daily Star, Maslov was criticized by both Putin and the Kremlin before his death for failing to produce enough tanks for Russian troops to use in Ukraine.

It appears Putin knew his schedule would be opening up, allowing him the opportunity to address more important issues. Awfully generous of Putin to allow his senior officers the "last minute" sick leave to go to the hospital with the sniffles.

That being said, if you nice folks will excuse me, I'm going to go make sure I make my beet quota, and maybe find some vitamin C.

Failure to produce enough tanks, huh? Good thing Putin was prepared for this tragic death by exchanging Russian prisoner Griner for USSA prisoner Victor (Merchant of Death) Bout in advance.

Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote: ↑

12/29/2022, 2:08 am

I'm going to go make sure I make my beet quota, and maybe find some vitamin C.

Vitamin C doesn't work. Linus Pauling admitted he was wrong about it back in the 1980s but no one listened.

However, Zicam works (and so do parachutes and inflatable suits).


 

Putin was mad because the general got greedy and stole 90% of the government money instead of the accepted 50% quota. That was why he had no tanks to give, and the ones he supplied were dysfunctional death traps.

Russia is losing the war in part because its generals had embezzled large chunks of their military budgets for their personal villa-dachas in the Mediterranean, and some in the Crimea.

The same generals are now about to lose those dachas because they're left with no resources to defend the Crimea, and their properties in Europe are also going to be confiscated and auctioned off to pay for the reconstruction of Ukraine.

Russia is known for its poetry, if not for its justice.

The thought of keeping 50% (or more) of a Biden administration defense contract... I'd get back in the military for such opportunities.

the fluctuating number of zeroes makes my head spin like that last batch of beet vodka fermented in the old anti-freeze barrel.

Red Square wrote: ↑

12/29/2022, 2:43 pm

Putin was mad because the general got greedy and stole 90% of the government money instead of the accepted 50% quota.

That dang Biden Administration Economic inflation has infiltrated even the minds of our enemies. The General forgot the last 10% went to The Big Guy.