It's sing along time with the People's very own capitalist rope salesman.


Sung to the tune of Janis Joplin's "Mercedes Benz" (more or less). Feel free to add new verses.


O-bama won't you buy me a new Chevy Volt
My old one exploded, it was quite a jolt
I occupied Wall Street, joined in the revolt
So O-bama won't you buy me a new Chevy Volt

O-bama won't you buy me some morning after pills
My girlfriend forgot hers and I need my thrills
The thought of changing diapers really gives me the chills
So O-bama won't you buy me some morning after pills

O-bama won't you buy me a new pair of skis
My old ones are old I'd like some new ones if you please
I supported your debt hike and ate all my peas
So O-bama won't you buy me a new pair of skis

O-bama won't you guarantee good health and long life
I smoke and drink and fool around - just don't tell my wife
My irresponsible lifestyle cuts deep like a knife
So O-bama won't you guarantee good health and long life

O-bama won't you give me the sun, moon and stars
Too much ain't enough, everything should be ours
Screw the constitution, just use your czars
So O-bama won't you give me the sun, moon and star

A MOST equal rendition, Comrade Last - I find myself breaking (virtually) into a guitar solo, even though I'm toiling in the beet fields at the moment!

O-bama won't you buy me a new set of strings
This song's for The People™ - my Marshalls have dings
New tubes would be handy, some picks, various things
O-bama won't you buy me a new set of strings

Comrades,

If humor was permitted, that might be good for a chuckle or two, but it isn't, so it's not! You may have very well won yourselves an all expense paid, extended vacation in Siberia.
Train transportation arrangements are pending!
Dress warmly and bring your shovel.

Though of another verse...

O-bama won't you buy me a brand new Trabant
My Volt just had a meltdown, transportation is scant
I used to drive a Beamer, now my prog friends say I can't
So O-bama won't you buy me a brand new Trabant

PS - I realized after the fact that this probably belongs in the People's Karaoke. Sorry - I'm still a cube noob

Comrade TheLastCapitalist! For a new noob you're doing exceptionally equal. Welcome to the collective.

I took the liberty to illustrate your post and add the PeopleTube video of the song. After a while I'll transfer this thread to People's Karaoke.

One note, though. It's better to upload images to our server using the Editor For The Rich function. If you link them from other websites, chances are they'll disappear from this page sooner or later.

Oh Bama won't you buy me a Moskvitch four oh seven
I'm down on my luck and I want to drive to heaven

The Warsaw pact version of cool:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPdmadS ... r_embedded

That's what I want!

A most equal redistribution of a golden oldie.

I feel a song coming on...

O-bama, won't you buy me a brand-new iPhone?
My rich friends all have one, I feel so alone!
Why should it matter if I'm 40 and live at home?
O-bama, won't you buy me a brand-new iPhone?

O-bama, won't you pay for my mortgage and my gas?
Myself, I'm too bus-y, sitting on my ass!
Bankers and oilmen wage war on the middle class!
O-bama, won't you pay for my mortgage and my gas?

O-bama, won't you forgive my freakin' student loans?
Mastered Womyn's Studies for a job answerin' phones!
Livin' in dad's basement - mom, she just moans...
"O-bama, won't you forgive our damn student loans?"

O-bama, please give me my free unicorn!
It's almost Next Tuesday and I'm not reborn!
Expected so much, now feelin' forlorn.
O-bama, just where IS my damn unicorn?

O-bama please give Opiate his damn unicorn
He took Womyn's Studies - he loves Berni Dohrn!
Give Capitalist a new Volt, by Next Tuesday morn -
O-bama, give Opiate that damn unicorn

Wow! Really feeling the equality here. If I weren't a capitalist pig I'd be downright comrade like.

Oh, Opiate of the People, as one of the Obama administration's top crony capitalists I am hereby providing you with your requested unicorn. I couldn't find a live one, but here's the next best thing:


Well, gotta go - there's masses to exploit and I feel a thought crime or two coming on.

[later - at a presumably safe distance]

... Muahhh ha haaaaahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaa! My eeeevil plot is proceeding perfectly. Thanks to Obama and a few trifling campaign contributions, soon I'll be selling them Beets, Algae, Volts, Trabants, and maybe even Yugos!!! As long as they keep thinking I'm a good little communist nobody will know the difference. The fools!!!

... uhhhh... is this microphone plugged in? ... oh shit