Where are our missing seven states ?


* What are their names ?

* Why aren't they shown on our flag ?

Our Dear Leader Obama has stated their existence as fact.
And He is never wrong ! ( just ask anyone at MSNBC or Newsweak Newsweek)
Therefore the problem must lie with us, His uncomprehending subjects.

We must find them , for they represent additional sources of revenue for the Federal government of the USSA.

Are there any discoveries, revelations or suggestions concerning our missing states from this august body of socialist- inspired commentators?

Remember that Dear Leader recently gave portions of Alaska to Russia, so there are really only 56.843 states now.

Maybe he was making reference to the United States of 'bama [USOB] instead of the USSA.

The annexation of our southern neighbor would provide the missing states. Further confusion is they could not all be named for dear leader without a numerical sequence.

The USPS [the P is for Piece of; the S is self explanatory] is very inaccurate as it is, please do not help them to be more so.

Our economy is inteState if that counts.

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Remember that Dear Leader recently gave portions of Alaska to Russia, so there are really only 56.843 states now.

I just laughed so hard I spewed beet vodka all over my computer screen

I can think of at least 3 of them off the top of my head.

---

The State of Denial
The State of Confusion
The State of Perpetual Ignorance.

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Dear Leader has been in all but one of them, ya know. You'll have to help me out on the rest...

The other 7 states:

1. Guantanamo Bay (must be dismantled ASAP)
2. Guam (must tip over and drown due to US military presence there)
3. Puerto (Porto) Rico (must become a state ASAP)
4. American Samoa (must become a state ASAP)
5. United States Virgin Islands (must become a state ASAP)
6. The Philippines (must be recaptured and become a state ASAP)
7. Haiti (must be recaptured and become a state ASAP)

Once this plan is implemented, Republicans will never again have enough electoral votes or representation in Congress to play any significant role in the fundamental transformation of America. Obama said exactly what he meant about the 57 states, he just didn't realize the camera was rolling.

1-Mexico
2-New Ghetto
3-North Dafoodstamp
4-South Dafoodstamp
5-New Kenya
6-Taxhisass
7-Michelleweighsaton, the largest state

If Algore had properly applied the electoral votes of 7 more states, think how much farther along we'd be today!

The People's Little Pony wrote: I just laughed so hard I spewed beet vodka all over my computer screen

Comrade, I do not wish to single you out, but lately there seems to be a growing epidemic of waste as more and more people are spewing their beet vodka upon their screens. Such frivolous waste might be seen as a sign to those of lesser equality as acceptable behavior. Considering the tight rationing, and scarcity of all resources, let us try to not waste any more of the vital beet vodka upon a computer screen.

KOMRADES!!!

I am SHOCKED! Mein Obama in Himmel…EVEN Kom. RED SQUARE!!! Oh, what sad days!

It is my Great Patriotic Duty to provide your names to Janet Napolitano as it is obvious you are all Reich-Wing domestic terrorists (yes, I indeed recognise it is redundant to use the terms “Reich-Wing” and “domestic terrorists” in the same sentence, but I digress) !

You have ALL committed not one, BUT TWO Great Blasphemies against the Dear Reader (AP&PBUH)! And each and every one of you are complicit in this great crime against the State!

First of all… You claim that Dear Reader (AP&PBUH) has stated that there exist 57 states in the United States. How DARE you blaspheme Him!? [highlight=#ffff00]Dear Reader (AP&PBUH) was quite clear…there are 58 STATES!

[/highlight]https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=p ... pGH02DtIws

[highlight=#ffff00]Not only are you all guilty of great blasphemy, but you have revealed your lack of dedicated devotion to Dear Reader (AP&PBUH)…[/highlight]were you all true Obamazombies followers -- instead of a bunch of RethugliKKKan moles -- you would have known that Dear Reader (AP&PBUH) was quite clear on the existence of all 58 states.

[highlight=#ffff00]As if this blasphemous treason were not enough, you have implied that Dear Reader (AP&PBUH) has mismanaged these eight alleged “missing” states.[/highlight] Just because YOU are too incompetent and lack the sophistication to find these other eight states (either physically or on a map) does not mean they are missing!

You may rest assured that all 58 states are indeed well in HIS capable hands…as you lanquish through your proforma show trials!

I am suddenly curious. Why was he not allowed to visit Alaska and Hawaii? Who could bar him from anywhere in this nation?

minister without porfolio wrote:I am suddenly curious. Why was he not allowed to visit Alaska and Hawaii? Who could bar him from anywhere in this nation?

One may recall that this quote was recorded prior to his Emaculation to the Office of Dear Reader (AP&PBUH).

I find your lack of faith disturbing...

Komrade

See for yourself. How many stars am I holding up?


WRONG! [Turns the rheostat up a few more notches and flips a switch...]

[highlight=#ffff00]ZAAAPPPP!!!!!
[/highlight]
Look again... 58 Stars for 58 States it is plain for any good komrade to see....

Right....ROOM 101!

I apologize for my confusion. It seems I was not kept up to date with the most recent revision of party approved historical truth. Perhaps it would be best, though, for historical references to never mention a time before the Obama reign? That way we are able to create a more perfect image of constant fatherly love by our Dear Leader?