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Now that the progressive Bible has been rewritten in kinder, gentler, Obamunist terms, it's time to take His message to the masses. Enter stage left: The Fainting Obama Supporter.


Fainting in church has long been a byproduct of fervent worshipping, or worse, actors in a scammy TV preacher infomercial. Rarely has fainting been caused by a political figure.

The Fainting Obama Supporter is a recent phenomenon. Since Obama started campaigning before his first term, no less than eight people have fainted at the sight of Him. This week, Obama Fervor claimed another victim.

Some have suggested that Ms. Allison may have fainted after seeing her new healthcare premium and deductible, but it turns out she was suffering complications from pregnancy and diabetes. If only the Republicans would provide her with an abortion and health insurance, she would be cured of the diseases of pregnancy and diabetes.


After watching these shenanigans play out, it's hard not to believe that perhaps Obama got his inspiration from some of the well-known scam methods.

A typical con artist trick is called the “Good Samaritan Scam,” which works by the scammer surreptitiously taking advantage of the victim, then offering to rescue the victim from the situation that the scammer caused. If a woman suffers a medical issue in his presence, Obama offers her a pain pill. This is what Saviors do. “Never let a crisis go to waste” on the path to single payer healthcare.

A medical version of creating chaos to play hero, is Munchausen Byproxy, a mental illness where the perpetrator poisons the victim, so that the perpetrator can nurse the victim back to health.

The progressive wing of the American government is enacting its own version of Munchausen Byproxy onto its citizens, by aiming for a socialized healthcare system. Such a system, due to long waits and refusal of care, is proven to make patients sicker, in countries that already have such a system. But, at least they care about you, even though you're getting sicker. And it's “free”!

This man fainted during an Obama speech, and visited a socialized healthcare facility. He did not see the Light in time. Now, he is a permanent resident of that Great Government Hospice in the sky.

The Fainting Obama Supporter is nothing more than a fictional victim of Obama-caused Munchausen Byproxy. The victim, overcome with Hope after seeing the Messiah, becomes light-headed. Obama, the good shepherd, steps in at just the right moment with a bottle of holy water, educating the audience on the importance of personal hydration. He appears to be an unwitting hero. One might be tempted to believe it, except for the fact that it's happened nearly a dozen times, on camera.


In the 1970s, Elizabeth Carmichael created plans for the Dale car. The Dale car was promoted as getting 70 miles per gallon with a retail price of $2000. This was a car that would revolutionize not only the industry, but society, as it would make cars affordable for the poor.


By the time it was discovered that this car was a fake, Carmichael had bolted with investors' money. The prototype was investigated by the authorities:

“On inspection of this vehicle it was not a viable vehicle at all. It had no engine. Two-by-fours were holding up the rear wheel. The accelerator was just sitting on the floor. It wasn't even attached. The windows were not safety glass. They would bend back and forth. The doors were put on by regular door hinges, like one might find on a house door. The vehicle just absolutely did not exist.”

Sound familiar? Less than one month after the launch of the hyped Obamacare website, there are no official numbers of successful enrollees, but myriad stories of people whose healthcare prices have skyrocketed. Obama himself could barely find three people who had successfully signed up.

Once the public got a look at what was under the hood of the Obamacare car, it became obvious that the system is held together by nothing more than blocks of wood and string. One IT expert claims that the website was built using "10-year-old technology." If you can even get in the website, you're in for quite a surprise.

Now, when the Obama supporter faints, it's most likely due to the shock caused by the price of the premium and deductible. But we can guarantee that Obama himself will never be held accountable for any of this fainting or fraud. No. He only wants to help.

The cause of the increased premiums and deductibles are caused by George W. Bush, the Republican Party, the Tea Party, greedy business owners, and even George Washington, who forced Obama to inherit all sorts of problems and who set up roadblocks (the Constitution) in the way of Obama's Agenda.

This week's fainting woman wanted to sign up for Obamacare, but hasn't yet. She, and everyone else who haven't signed up, are termed “Prospective Beneficiaries.” It's like a mirage in the desert. Millions have supposedly almost signed up, but nobody has quite managed to do it. Just keep sending that TV preacher a little more of your money. Salvation is right around the corner!

Just one comment, Comrade Olga - I believe that Comrade President is the Beta and the Obama, not the Alpha and the Obama. Valerie Jarrett is the Alpha.

I believe these progs fainting in the presence of Dear Leader is very real. Heck, I vomit faint just hearing his voice on the t.v.

Sometimes pretend faint is a way of removing oneself from premises, just as fake sneeze or cough is a way of hiding fact that one has burst out laughing.

RedDiaperette wrote:Sometimes pretend faint is a way of removing oneself from premises, just as fake sneeze or cough is a way of hiding fact that one has burst out laughing.