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The People's News #94, June 3

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I always thought the carpet bomb was what dogs drop on the carpet for humans to step into. Live and learn.

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Red Square wrote:
6/3/2022, 9:53 pm
I always thought the carpet bomb was what dogs drop on the carpet for humans to step into. Live and learn.

Au contraire, Comrade. The KAB 5100 is near the pinnacle of Iranian military technology, taking advantage of one of the nation's most plentiful natural man-made resources: an endless supply of Persian rugs.

Each one can can instantly cover up to 5,100 square feet of enemy territory with luxurious woven camelhair floor coverings in a variety of colors and textures that are maintenance-free and never need padding.

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Each KAB 5100 is capable of dealing a devastating psychological blow upon enemy soldiers who will give up all hope as they gaze in awe and despair at the Islamic Republic's mastery of textiles.

Also, enemy infidels can cut pieces out to use as prayer rugs after the Revolutionary Guards convert them at swordpoint.

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Colonel Obyezyana wrote:
6/4/2022, 4:34 pm
Red Square wrote:
6/3/2022, 9:53 pm
I always thought the carpet bomb was what dogs drop on the carpet for humans to step into. Live and learn.

Au contraire, Comrade. The KAB 5100 is near the pinnacle of Iranian military technology, taking advantage of one of the nation's most plentiful natural man-made resources: an endless supply of Persian rugs.

Each one can can instantly cover up to 5,100 square feet of enemy territory with luxurious woven camelhair floor coverings in a variety of colors and textures that are maintenance-free and never need padding.

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Each KAB 5100 is capable of dealing a devastating psychological blow upon enemy soldiers who will give up all hope as they gaze in awe and despair at the Islamic Republic's mastery of textiles.

Also, enemy infidels can cut pieces out to use as prayer rugs after the Revolutionary Guards convert them at swordpoint.

What’s not to like? These are handwoven and tied, right? No machine developed since 1250 is used on these babies. Keep that fringe straight, comrade.


 
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